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By  BurnInDemonFire  |  28

I'm not sure about this one. A part of me says staying friends with an ex/fuck buddy is mature, but the insecure part of me wonders why you'd hide something like that, what else you're hiding, and how honest you both are about it just being a casual friends-with-benefits deal, especially if it's something that happens when you're both single. If you and your friend can maintain that relationship, and then start fucking, why aren't you able to become an actual couple? Again, I know it's insecurity talking, but I guarantee the first thought your now ex-boyfriend had when you told him was "Is she staying friends with him in case she wants to be his fuck buddy again, or could she even cheat on me with him because they've been so close before?", and, sadly for you, he's decided not to stick around to find out. There's a big difference between staying on good terms with an ex you see every few months or so, and a friend who is a regular part of your life, while sometimes being your fuck buddy. Your boyfriend wasn't comfortable with the latter still being the case.

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  alycion  |  38

People can accept their partners having friends. People can even accept friends with benefits relationships in the past. But when you are still friends with the person, it can be too much. Especially since it was initially held back and we don’t know how it was brought up. It’s the sake reason why people aren’t always accepting of someone still being tight with an ex.

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  Callyn  |  47

Telling you what, that she's slept with someone else? That not all of her relationships end badly and she's still friends with past lovers? I can't see the breach of trust.

By  BurnInDemonFire  |  28

I'm not sure about this one. A part of me says staying friends with an ex/fuck buddy is mature, but the insecure part of me wonders why you'd hide something like that, what else you're hiding, and how honest you both are about it just being a casual friends-with-benefits deal, especially if it's something that happens when you're both single. If you and your friend can maintain that relationship, and then start fucking, why aren't you able to become an actual couple? Again, I know it's insecurity talking, but I guarantee the first thought your now ex-boyfriend had when you told him was "Is she staying friends with him in case she wants to be his fuck buddy again, or could she even cheat on me with him because they've been so close before?", and, sadly for you, he's decided not to stick around to find out. There's a big difference between staying on good terms with an ex you see every few months or so, and a friend who is a regular part of your life, while sometimes being your fuck buddy. Your boyfriend wasn't comfortable with the latter still being the case.

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  wookieewhosshe  |  26

I think you have trouble separating friendship, sex and relationships. they are 3 separate things, and you can have sex with someone and not want to be in a relationship

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This is different. OP turned a friend into a fuck buddy, and kept him around despite getting into a real relationship. How would you feel if your partner introduced you to a friend, and told you that they get together and fuck when they're both single? It's almost as though OP told her boyfriend "It doesn't matter what happens with us, because I've got him, and I didn't tell you we're occasionally fuck buddies in case you scare him off." I didn't say this guy was right for leaving, but his reaction is understandable. If he'd stayed, he would have always had that little voice in his head questioning if they might be hiding their true feelings from one another, and he's just a cover while they continue denying those feelings, so he bailed before his insecurities got the better of him. Sex, friendships, and relationships may be three individual things, but combine any two, or even all three, and life can become pretty complicated pretty quickly. It would seem that OP's boyfriend didn't want to deal with those complications, while OP herself could be in denial that she wants more from her friend. If she wanted sex as a cure for the itch, as it were, why not find a one-night stand, instead of using someone she was close with and agreeing they weren't going to "label it, and make it awkward"? Just as well cross all the lines if you're going to cross one. That, or hook up with a total stranger to deal with the urge, which is the simplest option.

By  Major_Haywire  |  4

I wouldn’t sweat it, you’re better off. Some ‘men’ can’t handle the thought of their partner have previous sexual relationships. You had no obligation to tell him and your openness gives you credit. Save it for someone who’s a bit more mature

By  E2dav  |  3

You deserve better than him. He was completely unreasonable. Your sexual history is irrelevant and it's actually a good thing you remained friends with the other guy.

By  LostSoul  |  18

Either be upfront about stuff or keep your mouth shut. It clearly was an issue. Why bring it up later in the relationship? That to me seems like you were tossing it in your boyfriend's face. How would you feel if your boyfriend hid that he was still spending time with a chick he used to bang. Guessing you also had private conversations and alone time with this fab. Bad Form!

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  Callyn  |  47

So are you supposed to bring a sexual resume with you to every first date? She probably brought it up because it was relevant to the conversation.