By my back hurts - 04/09/2013 05:25 - Australia - Campbelltown

Today, I spent a large portion of the afternoon playing hide and seek with the door-to-door salesman who saw me sneak in the back door and won't stop knocking. No amount of hiding behind the couch will make him go away. FML
I agree, your life sucks 40 514
You deserved it 7 410

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Unless he's selling Cheetos, you might as well punch him in the face.

Why do you need to hide? You both know you're in the house, and it's his time he's wasting if he keeps knocking. Just go about doing what you'd normally do and he'll get bored. You do realise it's not some kind of wacky scenario where you opening the door to him is inevitable, right?

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A fun competition: who has more free time? Did you win?

Exactly. I usually tell these people Im not interested! -_- you would think the "no soliciting" sign under the door bell is hint enough.

I propose a better competition- OP calls authorities for harassment and (maybe?) trespassing; if the salesman can talk his way out of it you buy the product.

I have an even better idea. Shove a shotgun in his face

#81 well that escalated quickly

I would have answered just for the fact that I did not even realize that door-to-door salesmen still exsisted!!

Why do you need to hide? You both know you're in the house, and it's his time he's wasting if he keeps knocking. Just go about doing what you'd normally do and he'll get bored. You do realise it's not some kind of wacky scenario where you opening the door to him is inevitable, right?

Or they could just open the door and say "I'm not interested." Then shut it again. There's that crazy idea too.

He should also check to make sure it's not something important, one time this "salesmen" wouldn't go away, and when my mother finally asked him what he wanted, he said he was the U-Verse guy, and there was problems in the area with signal he needed to warn us about.

it seems those people are really enthusiastic about selling stuff

Um... #34, that's their pitch. I bet your mom bought something, didn't she?

its australia... just tell him to fuck off! :)

Unless he's selling Cheetos, you might as well punch him in the face.

He's selling a new flavor of Cheetos. I think that's at least worth a blow to the balls.

Oh I see what you did there.

LMAOOOO

I love references to other FMLs. Makes me chuckle inside. :)

Just answer and try to convert him to Mormonism. Gets them to leave every time.

I've tried converting one to the worship of The Dread Father and The Night Mother.

Hail Sithis!

You know that you can just politely decline his offers right? I admire your stubbornness though!

Exactly. You can be a normal adult about it and have the 2-second conversation it would take. Stop being such a coward. Do you deal with all your problems by running and hiding?

Let him keep knocking, just don't answer the door. Eventually he'll get bored, and all he'll have gained is a sore hand.

Or tell him to get lost, and if he doesn't, call the cops on him for trespassing on your property.

It's totally legal to go door to door and sell or ask for charitable donations, most of the time these people have permits to do so as well. Plus, calling the cops on someone for just knocking on your door is a pretty big overreaction.

Not if they refuse to leave your property it isn't.

On the flip side of that, 49, OP hadn't asked him to leave. All he/she did was hide behind a couch.

I'm aware that the OP hadn't asked him to go away. In Denmark, ringing people's doorbells to sell them stuff they haven't signed up for is generally prohibited by law, but I realize it may not be so in other countries - which is why I suggested telling him to go away first. I'm pretty sure staying on someone's property and banging on their door despite being asked to leave is considered trespassing and harassment no matter what.

Where I live you have to ask them to leave your property. If they don't you could legally arrest them yourself for trespassing as long as you call the police immediately.

I mean, is calling the police out of the question?

This post made me laugh far too much. I hope OP gives a follow up :D

I can give you a follow up now: "Then he got tired of wasting his time with me and left." This isn't exactly the most extreme FML we've ever read here, c'mon..

43, extreme or not, I would like to know what happened next too.

I'm pretty sure one of them eventually caved

@59 Nope, OP is still hiding and the salesman is still knocking.

Journal Entry 09/04/13 "It's been three weeks now and I think they are multiplying. The first one set up camp shortly after I posted my FML and a few minutes after that I heard knocking on the backdoor, then one on the window, and I'm pretty sure I hear a few on the roof. I've started to ration my food now and my couch fort is two couches wide and three couches high. What am I going to do!? Journal Entry 2014???? My food supplies have been gone for a week or so now and the real hunger is eating me alive. I might be hallucinating, but I've been here do long I can no longer tell what is real and what isn't. Who's to say magazine subscriptions didn't always have teeth? Or dust bunnies have discussions on particle physics? I know I'm going to die, but to whoever is reading this: let it be known I never bought anything from those annoying maniacs!

Hahaha, exactly. .knowing how long it went on for and who won is something I'd want to know! :p

Don't let him in or he might try to sneak in YOUR back door. That's creepy as hell.

In more ways than one...

Yes, that was indeed the joke.