By good_aim - 27/07/2013 08:03 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, I returned from a long business trip a day early to surprise my wife. She was sleeping, so I climbed into bed and started spooning her. Thinking I was an intruder, she simultaneously kicked me in the groin, elbowed me in the ribs, and smacked the back of her head into my jaw. FML
I agree, your life sucks 48 251
You deserved it 26 835

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At least you know that she wont get robbed without fighting back

At least she's not having an affair?


At least you know that she wont get robbed without fighting back

or forcefully cuddled!

That's one helluva struggle snuggle

Damn OP, can I take lessons from your wife? :o

Plus he knows she's not cheating

Well at least you know your wife will be fine when you're away! :D

Sounds like he married Jason Bourne.

You mean Jessica Bourne? Nice lady..

At least you know she'll be safe when there is an actual intruder...

Do actual intruders crawl in bed with her and spoon her?

Even intruders need love.

Hes climbin yo windows snatchin yo people up tryna rape em... You guys could finish it right?

At least she's not having an affair?

Atleast she wasn't jane the killer.

I'd thought this was gonna say he caught someone else in bed with her.

58 - Me too! Congratulations, OP; Your wife is faithful.

Yeah, in my variation, OP managed to lie right on top of him. That'd be surprising enough.

Must say halfway through reading the FML I assumed this would be how it ended. Nice to hear its not for once ;)

Well, good to know she can protect the house like a boss! :D haha. Damn, that had to hurt though! Lol

I can protect the house in my sleep!

Are you married to the Black Widow?

Not a widow if she's married... xD

It sounds more like he's married to Gracie Hart (she remembered S.I.N.G. - well, she forgot the I)

On the bright side, she can protect you from evil. She's like the Fifth Element.

:/ sucks to sucks

This has to be one of the most influential comments I've ever read. I will, from this day forth, live my life by the code of sucks to sucks!

Go home 9, you're drunk.

Thats shitty deal. But least you kno she can take care of her self

Was putting a "w" there too much work?

apparently the "w" was just too much work!