By Anonymous - United Kingdom - Manchester
Today, I realized that my dog is an evil genius. As I sat down to have a snack, he barked as if he saw someone outside. I went to check it out, but nobody was there. When I returned, I found my dog on the table finishing off my bacon sandwich. FML
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  ilytyvm  |  25

Definitely a true problem solver. He's pointing out the only true solution.
You could take the sandwich with you, but then you have your back turned to your pooch, and if he has no courtesy, you could end up face down and your sandwich stolen from your hand before you know what happened.
We already know what happens when you leave the bacon sandwich on the plate while you go to check for a supervillain on your porch before you realize that the true villain is already in your house, scarfing down your sammich.
Therefore, the only answer left is to make your furry best friend his own food so he doesn't have to be put in the doghouse for stealing yours.
Good job!