Today, I met an old friend, with whom I have a complicated history and we hooked up. He came before we even started. In his sleep, he pushed me out of the bed. When I woke up, he had peed himself in his sleep. Glad I let that ship sail. FML
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By
Joey44
| 15
Yeah, it really is a good thing you let that ship sail and didn't hook up with him again... oh wait.
By
windfuelsfire
| 10
In a nutshell, he jizzed in his pants, rolled you off the bed and then marked you as his territory
COMMENTS
By
Dodie__fml
| 2
Seems slutty....
Reply
peptidoglycan
| 4
Why?
By
Feedmyaddiction5
| 14
Wow good thing you passed him up
Reply
gasbandit
| 2
From his point of view: Doesn't matter had sex.
Reply
gojira666
| 7
That dude really sucks at life
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bizarre_ftw
| 21
33 - depends on how you define sex :/
Reply
Jennyboo5797
| 4
But I cried the whole time! Doesn't matter had sex!
Reply
ohmandapants
| 16
She didn't pass him up. She agreed to sleep with him. He just finished before they started.
Reply
irollup
| 4
At least he pushed you out of bed, before he wet the bed..
Reply
taytay6510
| 6
she put a bag on my head, STILL COUNTS ;)
By
Joey44
| 15
Yeah, it really is a good thing you let that ship sail and didn't hook up with him again... oh wait.
Reply
hemz_fml
| 13
That's how you treat an old friend, that's a bitch move
Reply
izvakutzklipx
| 2
Baddapadapa!
Reply
ntherewas1
| 11
Are you sure he didn't do all these thing on purpose? One incident in isolation may be an accident, but with all these douchey expound problems he really seems to dislike you...
Reply
ankoku
| 2
At least he pushed her off the bed before pissing all over it give the guy some credit!
Reply
purplegold
| 19
Hahahahhahaha took the words right out of my brain
By
jonnied23
| 20
Better you learned that now, rather than llater
Reply
Marcella1016
| 31
Silver spring md Donnie? me too!
Reply
Marcella1016
| 31
*jonnie
Reply
docscientist
| 9
It sounds more like OP learned "later."
By
windfuelsfire
| 10
In a nutshell, he jizzed in his pants, rolled you off the bed and then marked you as his territory
Reply
jayAZ
| 3
Ha!
Reply
windfuelsfire
| 10
She slept in it I'm pretty sure marking is to leave a smell...a bad one.. Thats on her
By
Miss_Michaela
| 10
Complicated history? If it wasn't that complicated before, it bloody well is now.
By
bones_17
| 5
All I got to say is pathetic :p
Reply
Mister_Triangle
| 21
Am I the only one thinking about it from his perspective?
He's probably loved the OP since the day they met, and the excitement of the moment made him fire too soon. Stressed out by failing his dream girl, he was unable to sleep well and became restless; resulting in him flailing about unconsciously and wetting the bed. Now he'll be ashamed of this moment forever and endlessly ridiculed by the faceless people of the interwebs.
He's probably loved the OP since the day they met, and the excitement of the moment made him fire too soon. Stressed out by failing his dream girl, he was unable to sleep well and became restless; resulting in him flailing about unconsciously and wetting the bed. Now he'll be ashamed of this moment forever and endlessly ridiculed by the faceless people of the interwebs.
Reply
DerekBlaskie
| 6
I applaud you 84 for reading waaay to into this haha. Good effort but that's a stretch..
By
ndhin831
| 2
Shouldn't he be the one writing to FML?
Reply
ThreeSheetsGone
| 12
Nah, today was laundry day for him anyway.
Reply
bizarre_ftw
| 21
Too bad they were at her house :)
By
WCARlover
| 34
You must be friends with my ex?
By
kkmwong
| 11
That must have turned you on so much.
Reply
bengermin
| 5
Some people have a thing for diapers... apparently that guy needs to.