By henhouse - 18/07/2015 11:09 - Australia - Brunswick East

Spicy
Today, I lost my virginity. The most memorable aspect of it wasn't the fact that my boyfriend finished after two thrusts, but rather the fact that he first said, "The pilot has entered the cockpit." FML
I agree, your life sucks 31 988
You deserved it 3 647

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"Prepare for take off."

Lemme tell a similar story. Happened about an hour ago. I attempted to lose my virginity to the most beautiful girl on earth. Couldn't get it up.

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"Prepare for take off."

Landing gear engaged

He was basically the challenger mission. Too soon?

Ground control to Major Tom...

talk about crash landing...

IMO, yes, way too soon

Lemme tell a similar story. Happened about an hour ago. I attempted to lose my virginity to the most beautiful girl on earth. Couldn't get it up.

Don't worry about first times. most people are extremely nervous.

"Common bro, couldn't get it up? Gotta hit the gym more and quit being a bitch." -- Shirtless, Flexing FML Profile-Picture Douchebags

That's normal don't worry about it. The first time is almost always over hyped up anyways.

It's totally fine, 15-year-old girls don't gossip about things like this all the way until they graduate.

Was that before or after the second thrust?

This exact same thing happened to me last december

And after two seconds of being in the air you cum to a landing

A crash landing !

Well, i doubt op came to anything...

I'm sure there's been worse first times. Still it does suck - though it can only get better from here.

First times are generally supposed to be terrible - at least you got a funny story to tell out of it. It'll get better from here :)

To infinity, and beyond!

Maybe next time he can keep in in the air longer before cumming to a landing

That's actually hilarious, I would laugh it off ?

Would you? Would you really?

I actually would

Really? The question mark might be misleading.

First times always suck, especially if you are with an inexperienced partner. Sex can be overhyped and usually never lives up to your expectations the first time. But practice makes perfect, and hopefully he was respectful enough to make it up to you a different way ;)