Health: Today, I learned explosive diarrhea is real. I felt it coming...

By Anonymous - 24/11/2009 11:44 - United States

Today, I learned explosive diarrhea is real. I felt it coming and dashed into our supermarket. 10 feet in, liquid poo started spewing down my pants legs. 150 feet to go. I ran. It ran. They watched. After 15 minutes of cleaning, I slunk out. Now, I have to find a new market, maybe a new town. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 184

You deserved it 3 523

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 17/07/2015 17:14 - United States - West Palm Beach

Today, I felt some serious gas building up while at the supermarket. I tried to quietly fart it out, only to end up sharting myself. I had to frantically waddle out of the store as discreetly as possible as several people in the vicinity freaked out and tried to locate the source of the smell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 572

You deserved it 4 359

Leaked

By Morgan Bailey - 18/09/2018 14:00

Today, I tried to let out a small fart in a crowded restaurant. I had diarrhea. I walked past several families to get to the bathroom and clean myself up, only to still go home with a huge wet spot down my ass. My shirt wasn't long enough to hide it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 729

You deserved it 879

Poot

By dumblonde76 - 14/09/2021 07:00 - United States - Jackson

Today, I had a rumble in my tummy whilst picking up groceries. I tried to let out a little poot, but ended up shitting in my pants. I had to leave without the groceries. FML

I agree, your life sucks 888

You deserved it 365

Shitty situation

By Anonymous - 21/11/2022 22:00

Today, I had explosive diarrhea. I got off the toilet to change my 3 year-old's poopy diaper. He was being stubborn, so I was going to go back to the toilet, which is when he laid down. I thought I could do it. I couldn't. He ran around diaperless as I ran back to the toilet with liquid shit running down my leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 950

You deserved it 163

Fools rush in

By Anonymous - 15/11/2022 10:00 - United States - Utica

Today, after a shopping trip, I had the worst diarrhea attack and almost shat my pants before I could even get in the front door. By the time I could get the door open, it was taking all of my self-control to keep from shitting myself. I had to shit on the toilet with the front door and bathroom door wide open. FML

I agree, your life sucks 796

You deserved it 145

Looks like we made it… Oh.

By Anonymous - 12/10/2020 23:01 - United States - San Jose

Today, I went on a walk with my family because I'm trying to be more active. We were near my son's school when I got a grumbling in my stomach. I rushed to find a place to take a dump. As I approached a Porta-Potty, my ass couldn't hold it any longer and I shit myself 20 feet away from the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 322

You deserved it 192

Get rid of the evidence!

By Anonymous - 18/08/2020 17:11

Today, while my roommate was taking a bath, I became horribly sick out of nowhere. Since the bathroom was occupied, I ended up having explosive diarrhea in an Amazon box in my bedroom, which I immediately ran out to the dumpster. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 645

You deserved it 149

Jeremy?

By Anonymous - 20/04/2022 22:00

Today, I shat myself in the middle of Walmart. It dripped out the bottom of my pants till i made it to the restroom, which was on the other side of the store. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 112

You deserved it 258

First time for everything

By Anonymous - 02/02/2024 06:00 - United States - Hoffman

Today, I've been sneezing and coughing and not feeling well, so I decided to go to the grocery store to get some bone broth and some orange juice. Shortly after grabbing the orange juice, I felt like I had to pass gas, except it wasn't gas, it was diarrhea. At 35 years-old I pooped my pants in the grocery store. FML

I agree, your life sucks 573

You deserved it 151

By Anonymous - 31/12/2013 18:22 - United States - Bessemer

Today, I was at work alone with a stomach bug. For some reason, our bathroom was out of toilet paper, so I had to quickly run to the nearest store to buy more, only to shit my pants midway there. I'm pretty sure the cashier knew exactly what had happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 177

You deserved it 4 208

amaranthphantom 0

Tuesday 24 November 2009 16:16

I love the way you wrote that OP!! (first?)

Avenging_Angel 0

Tuesday 24 November 2009 16:42

Oh God  I remember when I had really bad diarrhea at Books A Million... Luckily it didn't reach past my underwear when I finally got to the bathroom. Note to people in charge of bathrooms: it is NOT cool when you have to ask for keys to bathrooms. When I gotta go, I GOTTA GO.

Comments

Jimboom 11

Tuesday 24 November 2009 17:15

Lol. Funny shit. And your not missing much by having to avoid that crappy supermarket. ;)

Rachel420o8 0

Tuesday 6 April 2010 7:26

roflmao.... did u put the play of words on purpose or was it purely coincidental?? "crappy supermarket"... classic... awesome!!! and btw FYL indeed OP

grandma_moses 0

Tuesday 24 November 2009 17:18

everybody poops. maybe not explosively..

driedpeaches 0

Tuesday 24 November 2009 17:24

Should of just shit in your car, or outside, or just anywhere other than streaming it through the store and everyone's food..

Inky_fml 0

Tuesday 24 November 2009 17:40

Today, this guy came into my store and sprayed nastly, liquid diarrhea EVERYWHERE. And I had to clean it up. F both of your lives.

culeysue015 0

Tuesday 24 November 2009 17:41

you arent the first, go read The Austin Road Trip story by Tucker Max. He just so happens to be famous and loaded, so rather than be embarrassed by it, he published it in a book and made a movie out of it...maybe you could try that

trizzieb 0

Tuesday 24 November 2009 17:48

Thats great. my wife calls that a " home depot moment" because the same thing happened to here there. it was funny as hell. Another time my step dad vanished for what seamed like forever at a restaurant. turns out, he had the same thing and had to throw out his underwear in the bathroom trashcan. FYL

caancoha 0

Tuesday 24 November 2009 17:52

Crud, OP. I'm sorry you had such a shitty time. Hopefully you ran down the aisle with toilet paper and paper towels to make the poor workers' lives easier.

chellinha93 0

Tuesday 24 November 2009 18:13

RUN FOREST RUN! LOL. Very funny OP, FYL though.

bdfortin 0

Tuesday 24 November 2009 18:17

Here's a tip: Learn about sphincter control, you idiot. Clench that ****** up like someone's trying to rape you (and you AREN'T enjoying it). Then not only will you be able to make it to the bathroom, you could walk there calmly without causing a scene.

goldpeaches 0

Tuesday 24 November 2009 20:44

true!

Oplleez 0

Wednesday 25 November 2009 0:28

Yeah... i'm SURE op didn't try to hold it or anything. IO guess you would know. Shit must run through you all the time cause you're definitely an asshole.