Work: Today, I had to take a drug test for a new job. I ended up spilling...

By Anonymous - 05/04/2014 23:16 - United States - Windsor Heights

Today, I had to take a drug test for a new job. I ended up spilling the cup of pee all over myself. I had to explain what had happened, then go sit in a waiting room full of disgusted-looking people, while I kept drinking water to fill my bladder back up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 413

You deserved it 6 445

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Same thing different taste

By overflowing - 16/04/2011 22:20 - United States

Today, I had to take a mandatory drug test with the doctor present. Nervous, I couldn't get myself to pee in the cup right away. When I finally did, I couldn't stop myself from overfilling the cup and getting pee all over myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 195

You deserved it 8 672

Are you taking the piss?

By Anonymous - 28/05/2019 14:00

Today, I was being drug tested as part of a pre-employment policy for substitute teaching. Once I had peed in the cup enough to pass the line, I put it on the only available space: the toilet paper holder. Trying to get toilet paper, I knocked the cup over, spilling pee all over myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 520

You deserved it 914

By Tib - 18/12/2009 06:42 - United States

Today, I had to take a urine test. I drank a lot of water so that I wouldn't force it. When I got there, I had to pee really bad. The cup was too small and when I relieved my bladder, it was a jet that rebounded off of the cup and overflowed going all over my hands, clothes, toilet, and floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 390

You deserved it 26 481

By urinanalysis - 03/12/2009 16:08 - Canada

Today, I went to get blood and urine tests done before work. As I was attempting to aim into the cup, I lost balance and slipped. I ended up peeing on my sleeves and my pants. I was late for work and I smelled like pee. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 365

You deserved it 7 313

By heck - 12/08/2016 13:57

Today, I took a drug test. Not only did I fail the drug test, but I mostly missed the sample cup and got urine all over my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 154

You deserved it 18 520

Straining

By NoPeeGiven - 14/04/2013 05:10 - United States - Palatine

Today, I had to go to the clinic for a physical. The nurse asked me for a pee sample; however, I had no urine to give. After 20 minutes of standing at the stall I was able to squeeze half a cup of pee. As I approached the sink to cover the sample, I somehow managed to drop it all over myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 890

You deserved it 9 989

By killme - 29/02/2016 07:00 - Canada - Belleville

Today, I had to pee in a cup. The cup almost overflowed. My first instinct was to drink some so it didn't spill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 554

You deserved it 23 576

By Anonymous - 10/06/2016 17:02 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I had to take a drug test for my new job, which I desperately need and which took me over a year to land. I got a shy bladder and couldn't pee. They marked me as non-compliant and revoked the job offer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 709

You deserved it 1 317

By analbel - 05/11/2018 12:00

Today, I had to get a urine analysis done for my doctor. I take medicine that makes me a little shaky sometimes. Guess who spilled their pee all over themselves while trying to put the lid on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 848

You deserved it 219

By slaughterteddy - 20/07/2016 23:23 - United States

Today, I spent two hours trying to catch a urine sample whilst at urgent care due to my inability to pee in public restrooms. I finally managed one, and was so excited by my success that I fumbled it and spilled it on my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 040

You deserved it 2 547

anythingmustbe 18

Sunday 6 April 2014 13:45

They probably thought you were pissed.

Capitan 15

Sunday 6 April 2014 13:49

Your story brought back the memories.. Except mine spilled on the nurse. She was pissed.

Comments

anythingmustbe 18

Sunday 6 April 2014 13:45

They probably thought you were pissed.

JustinKirby 20

Sunday 6 April 2014 15:07

Urine luck if nobody finds our about it.

NeatNit 32

Sunday 6 April 2014 16:08

Yeah, just don't spill to your friends about what happened and you'll be fine.

thefastnfuryass 14

Sunday 6 April 2014 19:23

Sounds like a piss in the pants good time!

viva_la_blondes 15

Sunday 6 April 2014 19:44

OP should make a song about it. I'd definitely download the M PEE 3

da_best_eva 9

Sunday 6 April 2014 23:14

What a piss-poor experience

Godsofdracos 15

Monday 7 April 2014 0:53

43... No, just no. That doesn't even make sense.

Marley_000 14

Monday 7 April 2014 7:53

How easy is it to spill a cup of your own piss, though?

Kergami 18

Monday 7 April 2014 12:47

Easy enough when you aren't paying attention.

ItsATwinThing 9

Sunday 6 April 2014 13:49

How did you end up spilling it over yourself OP?

glabberfasted 16

Sunday 6 April 2014 14:01

How does anyone spill anything on themselves? It's an accident. Although, speaking as someone who deals with patients' urine samples on a daily basis for work, I know first hand just how utterly unstable those cups are. Half of the time the cap doesn't even seal properly.

GuiLD15 7

Sunday 6 April 2014 16:36

...that second part of your comment really should have been your only reply, urine nurse. Especially if you knew the answer -.-

MrSassypants 33

Sunday 6 April 2014 17:00

And no part of your comment should have been your reply.

addictedtosorrow 12

Monday 7 April 2014 5:01

Your username matches your reply so well #37.

Capitan 15

Sunday 6 April 2014 13:49

Your story brought back the memories.. Except mine spilled on the nurse. She was pissed.

bazoo42 25

Sunday 6 April 2014 15:47

My cup luckily spilled on the floor. I had set it on the back of the toilet which, I soon discovered, was sloped.

purebliss_fml 19

Sunday 6 April 2014 13:50

very embarrassing situation OP. At least you (hopefully) won't see those people ever again

Octwo 16

Sunday 6 April 2014 19:10

I just keep wondering how they think they have a right to be disgusted. He's the one covered in urine. If anyone gets to be disgusted, it's him.

ohcheriecherie 20

Monday 7 April 2014 7:56

at least OP wasn't on drugs.

jsp16 24

Monday 7 April 2014 22:57

I had to look twice at "disgusted looking people" because I read it as "disgusting looking people."

radrahrachel 7

Sunday 6 April 2014 13:50

All that while covered in piss? Now that sucks.

cosmicriver 17

Sunday 6 April 2014 14:00

I feel your pain, my friend. I have done that myself. I have another drug test story, but I think I may attempt posting it. A hilariously embarrassing story for another time.

theDopestChiick 8

Monday 7 April 2014 7:01

tell me

Wizardo 33

Sunday 6 April 2014 14:02

Urethra be covered in piss than fail the test, in the end no one is gonna keep tract of this event anyway.

syki 22

Sunday 6 April 2014 14:40

I know your intentions were good and you just wanted to kid me, but most of those would be rather a stretch to even the most generous reader. That's quite enough, Random Online Noob. (Or "That's 'nuff, RON.") - Sincerely, The Anti-Pun League

syki 22

Sunday 6 April 2014 15:14

PS: I'm not actually as pissed as I think I might seem—oh no! I've been corrupted! PPS: It occurred to me that people might not get the last one. It's nephron. I need sleep.

babygurll19 10

Sunday 6 April 2014 19:28

#8, good try... it would've made more sense if you put "or" because you're trying to point out an "either-or" situation.

Jellybellybeanz 22

Sunday 6 April 2014 14:06

My brother dropped his cup filled with pee in the toilet and spilled it all. Then he had to drink a whole bunch as well lol but that's pretty embarrassing OP. FYL