Kids: Today, I had to clean up after the kid that discovered he could... - FML

By Anonymous - 11/09/2011 19:16 - United Kingdom

Today, I had to clean up after the kid that discovered he could finger paint with his poo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 239

You deserved it 3 179

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 14/05/2019 02:00

Today, at work, I came back from my break to find a child covered in mud. Turns out it wasn't mud. One of the other children had taken all of the poop out of their diaper and smeared it all over the floor, walls, and other children. The other teacher hadn't noticed, and I had to clean it all up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 111

You deserved it 139

By Vitani_Verci - 15/01/2016 06:57

Today, one of the kids at the daycare center I work at was so excited at the fact that his constipation was over, he felt the need to bring me his fecal matter, in his hands, to show me. Guess who had to clean up the aftermath. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 957

You deserved it 1 778

Primitive art

By Anonymous - 19/04/2021 00:30

Today, I went to check on my 2 year-old daughter in her playroom, since she was being awfully quiet. I walk in to see her finger painting with her own feces on her kiddie table. FML

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You deserved it 294

Learning curve

By Anonymous - 16/08/2017 16:00

Today, my 3-year-old son put into practice the lesson I taught him yesterday, about how to use a larger piece of Play-Doh to pick up smaller bits. Unfortunately, he used this method to pick up a small bit of poo from his pants with a larger bit of poo direct from the toilet. I was an hour late for work. FML

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You deserved it 490

By Anonymous - 27/02/2010 06:36 - United States

Today, I was babysitting to make a few extra dollars. While changing one of the kid's diapers, I turned around to find the other kid gone. I turned back around frantically, only to get poop flung at my face. I guess I found him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 594

You deserved it 3 172

By Dirty - 23/02/2017 08:00 - Canada

Today, I grabbed a fresh hand towel from the drawer in the bathroom. I wiped my hands and noticed they smelled like shit. My 6-year-old had wiped poo from his finger onto the dark grey towels. I guess he sometimes helps the poo out. Good to know. FML

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You deserved it 556

So sweet

By Mom of 3 - 07/10/2018 15:30

Today, I was washing dishes while my 2-year-old was napping… or so I thought. When I finished and went to check on her, I found she'd taken off her diaper and smeared poop all over the carpet. She must have been up a while because it was everywhere. I spent the next hour scrubbing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 952

You deserved it 428

By chuchie - 12/06/2009 02:39 - United States

Today, I was babysitting my 5 month old nephew who hasn't pooped in 2 days according to his mom. Well, he pooped. I accidentally stuck my finger in it. While I was wiping my finger off, he rolls over and pees on my new carpet. I roll him over to clean the pee and he opened fire and pooped again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 539

You deserved it 6 647

Surprise!

By ilana - 10/02/2012 09:51 - United States

Today, I was working at my day-camp, and one of my little boys told me he had to show me something important. He proudly showed me that he'd crapped his pants. I had to wipe his ass clean. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 422

You deserved it 3 346

By Livingthedream - 12/08/2018 06:00

Today, I got home from a long day of work and saw a pile of dog puke on the kitchen floor. I went to get paper towels and found a pile of dog shit. With my foot. Both of my kids were home all day and left the piles for me to clean because "that's gross". FML

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You deserved it 463

Next

Top comments

LaydiexSkull 3

Monday 12 September 2011 2:20

How creative!(: He might grow up to be the next Picasso OP :p

lemonkittens 8

Monday 12 September 2011 2:24

Poop really captures the true essence of the color brown. Or green. It depends. Be grateful now he can draw you pretty pictures in beautiful, high quality colors.

Comments

mcbobob 0

Monday 12 September 2011 13:49

an here on this wall is a beautiful nearly photographic rendition of Mr hanky the Christmas poo

lDobinho 1

Monday 12 September 2011 16:51

The first half of the 21st century will always be remembered for the new artistic movement it introduced, namely: 'poopoo-paintings', which require only the use of human paintbrushes (fingers and to a certain extent toes) and human products (excrements) in order to produce original and authentic works.

bshinn4884 9

Monday 12 September 2011 18:28

Today, my teacher this lady totally messed up my poo art. FML

SlapYouSilly 0

Monday 12 September 2011 19:12

Kmsl Wow

dogpup4 23

Monday 12 September 2011 19:22

Haha, the funniest thing about this is that I also live in Derbyshire.

stAterugby 0

Monday 12 September 2011 19:24

Genious!

Nikitakudi 0

Monday 12 September 2011 20:27

haha haha o.m.g. Thats nasty

Superllama12 11

Monday 12 September 2011 23:08

Genius!! I should try that!

tommys_cool123 4

Tuesday 13 September 2011 0:28

That's a shitty situation XD. Sorry. Had to.

missliss33 0

Tuesday 13 September 2011 1:23

That's just gross

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The Top

Today, I'm 37 years-old. I work full time and make 20 dollars an hour. I live with my parents. I still cannot afford to move out and I'm completely broke. I keep overspending because I get anxious because I feel like a failure. I'm addicted to sugar and eat a pint of ice cream a day. FML

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Today, I was shopping with my girlfriend, when a girl came out of nowhere, screaming at me for cheating on her, and saying she was dumping me. I've never seen her before, and she was almost grinning during her little act, but my girlfriend believed it, and I'm now single. FML

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The Top

Today, I still can't find a job to support myself. The only experience I have is a month in retail and a summer spent in a kitchen de-pooping shrimp. FML

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Today, the guy I like recommended I buy this computer game. Wanting to impress him, I agreed. Turns out it was a joke. I am now the proud owner of Microsoft Train Simulator 2005, and he can't stop laughing. FML

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Today, in the middle of the night, my fiancé started yelling gibberish in his sleep. When I tried to wake him, he punched me square in the face. FML

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Today, I had to admit to myself that recently my biggest kink was watching Sam Seder debate libertarians. My oh my, watching him dunk on them on YouTube gets me hot and bothered. This feels wrong. FML

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Today, I accidentally sent a nude to my 10-year-old brother. FML

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Today, my son claimed credit for a money-saving scheme at work that belonged to a colleague. He claimed this to someone in very upper management, but when they tried to ask follow-up questions, he obviously had no idea how to answer, admitted his lie and was sacked on the spot. FML

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