Today, I had just finished an elaborate charcoal drawing as part...

By Lameartist - 12/2/2012 10:36

Today, I had just finished an elaborate charcoal drawing as part of a college application that took a good week. When I read over the requirements, I found out it needed to be done in graphite pencil. FML

I agree, your life sucks

16510

You deserved it

37720

Favorite

Miscellaneous

Does it taste good?

Long story short

Everyone's an expert

By BoomHeadshot - 2/5/2012 02:27 - Australia

Today, I was trying to sneak home from a party. Instead, I head-butted a glass door and woke my mother up. FML

I agree, your life sucks

7590

You deserved it

32709

Favorite

By Anonymous - 26/6/2010 00:29 - United States

Today, I was at the store when I saw two extremely hot girls. I walked into their aisle and they looked at me and smiled. I stopped and pretended to look at something so I could listen to what they were saying. They started laughing and walked away. It turned out I was reading a box of tampons. FML

I agree, your life sucks

11488

You deserved it

51441

Favorite

By justagirl - 21/12/2019 14:00

Fatherlessness

Today, my ex started to talk to me again after 3 years. I've been in an amazing relationship for the last 2 years. She let me know she is taking me to court for child support. I didn't even know I had a kid. FML

I agree, your life sucks

2327

You deserved it

200

Favorite

By Anonymous - 8/2/2017 04:00 - United States - Tucson

Today, I was playing tug of war with my dog. She let go and I ended up punching myself in the mouth. My lip is still swollen. FML

I agree, your life sucks

5861

You deserved it

1055

Favorite

By NotHungryAnymore - 1/3/2016 15:46 - United States - Rochester

Today, my boss is now so comfortable with me that she doesn't even try to hide the fact that she goes digging for gold in her nose through every conversation we have. FML

I agree, your life sucks

18707

You deserved it

1315

Favorite

By Anonwymous - 18/10/2009 10:16 - United Kingdom

Today, I asked my fiancé's daughter to use her phone so I could call mine which I'd misplaced. Busy with homework, she nodded. Only after she jumped up did I notice that she had my number listed with a humiliating nickname, and accompanied by a photo of her middle finger. FML

I agree, your life sucks

35845

You deserved it

5494

Favorite

By not living happily ever after - 2/12/2014 17:02 - United States - Virginia Beach

Today, I deleted a load of junk that was messing up my mother's computer. I don't know how I'm going to tell her I accidentally wiped out all of her wedding photos. FML

I agree, your life sucks

23405

You deserved it

31297

Favorite

By pey - 21/5/2020 14:00

Revelations

Today, my boss told me I had to fire my co-worker. I didn't want to do it, but I didn't want to lose my job. I told my co-worker that the boss said we had to let him go. He told me that he had sex with my wife. My wife didn't deny it. FML

I agree, your life sucks

2264

You deserved it

132

Favorite

By Anonymous - 15/5/2016 14:56 - France - Brunoy

Today, I accidentally left my bedroom light on all day. When I got home, my mum screamed at me for wasting electricity. This is the same woman who leaves the TV on all day while she’s at work, all so our dogs have something to watch and won't be “bored”. FML

I agree, your life sucks

14812

You deserved it

1363

Favorite

By Boo Boo - 22/1/2012 04:23 - United States

Today, I went to get my blood drawn to see how far along I am pregnant. The lady stuck both my arms twice and then busted a vein in my right arm. She told me to come back tomorrow to try again. FML

I agree, your life sucks

31988

You deserved it

2265

Favorite

By Justcan'twin - 9/10/2017 16:45

Today, at 5:30 on a Sunday, I noticed my tire had a bubble in it. I found a tire shop 15 minutes away that would be closing at 6pm and made it there in time, but the shop had closed early. I left to try and make it to the next one and had a blow out. FML

I agree, your life sucks

2449

You deserved it

275

Favorite

By Alicia - 13/5/2010 22:49 - United States

Today, my friends and I had a long fun day at the river. That was until sundown. I now have mosquito bites in places you don't want to know. FML

I agree, your life sucks

23723

You deserved it

11319

Favorite

By cloudish - 21/5/2017 12:00 - Germany

Today, I finally had the guts to tell my best friend that I like him more than just as a friend. I was about to tell him when he excitedly told me that he met the love of his life yesterday. FML

I agree, your life sucks

4950

You deserved it

585

Favorite

By HairyBoobs - 5/11/2009 14:22 - United States

Today, I nearly sliced my nipple off while shaving my chest and had to go to the ER. Turns out it was a teaching hospital so I got to explain in front of two doctors and eight med students how, even though I'm a woman, my nipples are so hairy I have to shave them. FML

I agree, your life sucks

43261

You deserved it

6849

Favorite

By secret123 - 24/2/2009 11:01 - United States

Today, me and my girlfriend were watching some show about sex on the discovery channel. The topic of female orgasms came up and she said, "Wow, I wonder what that's like?" We've been dating and sexually active for three years. FML

I agree, your life sucks

47011

You deserved it

19000

Favorite

By GN - 17/9/2012 04:47 - United States - New York

Today, I got stopped by the fuzz. The officer told me he "could care less" about my excuses. He was probably about to let me go without a ticket, but my inner Grammar Nazi kicked in and I explained why he meant to say "couldn't care less." I got the ticket. FML

I agree, your life sucks

9296

You deserved it

46760

Favorite

By snidpea - 31/1/2010 17:07 - France

Today, I sprained my ankle while playing soccer. I still have to walk home. In the rain. FML

I agree, your life sucks

27957

You deserved it

3465

Favorite

By - 25/1/2019 20:00

Today, I called 911 and got taken to hospital via ambulance after a suicide attempt. When I called my mom, the first thing she asked was, "How much is the ambulance going to cost?" FML

I agree, your life sucks

2755

You deserved it

927

Favorite

By Emmz91 - 6/9/2019 16:00

Brain fart

Today, I couldn't open my car door from the inside. I rang my father-in-law in a panic and he opened it from the outside for me. Then he asked why I just didn't roll down the window and do it myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks

630

You deserved it

1535

Favorite

By yellow_sunflowers101 - 16/4/2009 16:53 - United States

Today, my family and I ran into an older man my parents knew. He continually asked me questions like do you play football, have you started shaving yet, etc. I thought he was joking. He told my parents I had grown into quite a young man. I am a girl and he wasn't joking. FML

I agree, your life sucks

76332

You deserved it

4835

Favorite

By kittyslayer - 15/12/2011 02:46 - United States

Today, my landlord came and beat on my door demanding the rent check. I just got home from a trip and my wife was supposed to pay it while I was away. What happened to the money? Black Friday. FML

I agree, your life sucks

32867

You deserved it

3861

Favorite

By Anonymous - 10/5/2015 13:47 - United States

Today, I was feeling pretty, so I wore a skirt for the first time in years. Two hours later, my thighs hurt from slapping together so much. I no longer feel pretty. FML

I agree, your life sucks

31543

You deserved it

5219

Favorite

By kiriakousauce21 - 15/2/2010 07:44 - France

Today, I woke up thinking after wearing glasses and contacts all my life that I had miraculously been corrected to 20/20. Turns out I had just fallen asleep with my contacts in. FML

I agree, your life sucks

11817

You deserved it

32730

Favorite

By Username - 25/5/2011 16:06 - United States

Today, my boyfriend told me I looked pretty. I said, "Aww, that's the first time you've said that to me." He replied, "Well, it's the first time you've looked pretty." FML

I agree, your life sucks

52264

You deserved it

9570

Favorite

By rackman007 - 13/5/2009 23:26 - United States

Today, I was wearing my new sunglasses while watching a basketball game. A pretty hot looking girl was sitting a few spots next to me so I stared at her breasts. A few minutes later, I looked up at her face and she was looking at me in disgust. It turns out that my sunglasses were see through. FML

I agree, your life sucks

9242

You deserved it

91639

Favorite

By Noname - 14/3/2009 18:22 - United States

Today, I checked my Facebook to find I had been tagged in a bunch of photos from a party I had attended last night. On each picture I had a comment from my mom saying, "You're grounded." FML

I agree, your life sucks

33969

You deserved it

81824

Favorite

By Anonymous - 14/2/2010 01:21 - United States

Today, my husband and I took a walk on the wharf. We walked by a Wax Museum and in front of the museum there was a bench with a very realistic wax man sitting on it. I got very close to his face and yelled over to my husband how realistic the wax man looked. Just then, he coughed. FML

I agree, your life sucks

8668

You deserved it

34601

Favorite

By mommysgirlapparently - 29/10/2010 03:17 - United States

Today, my mom was on my Facebook and saw a chick leave a nasty comment on my status. My mom commented back something awful and really bitchy. My mom still fights my fights for me. I'm 20. FML

I agree, your life sucks

27639

You deserved it

8017

Favorite

By cheshirealyce - 5/3/2015 17:36 - United States - Jacksonville

Today, my day began with a "Good morning, beautiful." and ended with a "Maybe someone would love you if you were pretty." FML

I agree, your life sucks

36480

You deserved it

2800

Favorite

By Mishlette - 23/1/2015 13:27 - United Kingdom - Derby

Today, I started at my new job. Turns out my boss is a complete douchebag. He spent most of the day looking over our shoulders and making cuntish comments about our work, then called a guy a piece of shit for farting and forced him to spray disinfectant on his chair. FML

I agree, your life sucks

31758

You deserved it

2735

Favorite

By Anonymous - 6/4/2014 21:07 - Ireland - Dublin

Today, while on a first date, I had to excuse myself to the restroom. I was still tired from pulling an all-nighter, and fell asleep on the toilet. When I woke up and rushed back out, my date was gone. Everyone now thinks I'm an arsehole who pulled the old "window escape" trick on her. FML

I agree, your life sucks

46718

You deserved it

13778

Favorite

By Anonymous - 6/8/2013 15:19 - United States - Decatur

Today, my daughter, who was born in late 2000, mentioned how amazing it is that she'll be alive during the year 3000. I asked her exactly how old she thinks she'll be by then. She said, "Thirty, duh." I've screwed up as a parent, so very badly. FML

I agree, your life sucks

63523

You deserved it

15819

Favorite

By CheeseyPotatoes - 11/4/2011 13:16 - United States

Today, I wore a fake wedding ring on my left hand when buying a pregnancy test so the cashier at Walmart wouldn't think I'm a slut. FML

I agree, your life sucks

23642

You deserved it

73330

Favorite

By pieceofcake163 - 29/12/2010 08:59 - United States

Today, I found out that my booty call only likes to have sex with me so afterwards he can watch ESPN on my plasma screen TV, because he has neither. FML

I agree, your life sucks

11512

You deserved it

16976

Favorite

By Anonymous - 22/3/2009 03:38 - United States

Today, my little 7 year old brother asked me what horny meant whilst in the car with my parents. When I wouldn't tell him what it meant he screamed, "I'm getting horny!" at the top of his lungs, and told my parents that I told him to say it. FML

I agree, your life sucks

67582

You deserved it

7087

Favorite

By nomwar - 17/6/2013 13:55 - United States

Today, I went to a new bar with friends. After arriving I became extremely gassy; I planned a smooth release during the loud music. Little did I know the bar occasionally dips its music to hear the guests singing. When the music turned off all eyes turned to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks

46022

You deserved it

14825

Favorite

By Anonymous - 24/9/2012 19:09 - United States

Today, my mother found a hickey on my neck. Not believing that it was from the hungry 2-month-old child I was holding, she confronted my boyfriend about it. He promptly accused me of cheating. FML

I agree, your life sucks

29745

You deserved it

2647

Favorite

By Kelly - 27/12/2010 04:44 - United States

Today, I gave my boyfriend a box of chocolates as a present. A few hours later, he texted me saying that the box of chocolates contained nuts. He's allergic to nuts and his mother now thinks I'm trying to kill him. FML

I agree, your life sucks

26523

You deserved it

11744

Favorite

By Scarred4Life - 1/1/2012 06:18 - United States

Today, the last few seconds of my 2011 was spent staring at my drunk, naked uncle pouring olive oil over himself and rubbing it in. FML

I agree, your life sucks

32661

You deserved it

3483

Favorite

By Anonymous - 13/8/2020 08:01

Time to move out

Today, I'm spending $1,400 on rent each month to hear my upstairs neighbor walk from one end of their apartment to the other, and then back again. This occurs pretty much all day and all night. Yesterday I woke up at 3:30 a.m. from the banging of steps. My other neighbor played his music so loud, I felt it through the wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks

867

You deserved it

Favorite

Add a comment

You must be logged in to be able to post comments!

Create my account Sign in

Top comments

By itsame0987 | 18

#4025857 - Sunday 12 February 2012 19:12

You should have read the requirements first op. YDI

By eigelste | 0

#4025856 - Sunday 12 February 2012 19:12

Damn light it on fire and start over

COMMENTS

By eigelste | 0

#4025856 - Sunday 12 February 2012 19:12

Damn light it on fire and start over

CalCommando | 6

#4026052 - Sunday 12 February 2012 20:06

Arson is usually frowned upon in universities.

boundbytheanimus | 9

#4026102 - Sunday 12 February 2012 20:22

Arson is the burning of a building.

davidbdb485 | 0

#4026126 - Sunday 12 February 2012 20:35

Arson is the intentional burning of property, it doesn't only include structures, including your own. Ex: Setting your car on fire to collect insurance.

quite_bored | 9

#4026318 - Sunday 12 February 2012 21:50

Arson is a very good kid.

Jbfu | 0

#4026328 - Sunday 12 February 2012 21:56

Who the hell cares about arson and what it means? Just burn the damn thing!

boundbytheanimus | 9

#4026360 - Sunday 12 February 2012 22:10

45, Ah, sorry?

MelTheGreat | 23

#4026387 - Sunday 12 February 2012 22:22

You make a good point there, sir.

brown24eyes | 0

#4026395 - Sunday 12 February 2012 22:26

you can probably get away with specifying that it's a 6B graphite stick

bizarre_ftw | 21

#4026436 - Sunday 12 February 2012 22:45

Or this, this is good too (compared to my idea)

alexwarfield333 | 1

#4026939 - Monday 13 February 2012 2:35

Hey 35! Fail!

eigelste | 0

#4028520 - Monday 13 February 2012 6:15

In case no one understood the joke, it's a charcoal drawing and charcoal is the best base for a fire.

nic7973 | 23

#4028979 - Monday 13 February 2012 9:38

burn baby, burn

Strajee | 23

#6607055 - Monday 16 May 2016 8:32

35 was joking as in taking it that the OP of this comment meant the school and not the paper. I can't believe nobody caught on to his hilarity!

By itsame0987 | 18

#4025857 - Sunday 12 February 2012 19:12

You should have read the requirements first op. YDI

123josie123 | 11

#4026013 - Sunday 12 February 2012 19:55

^ this.

Nebulas_n_Novas | 7

#4026054 - Sunday 12 February 2012 20:06

2 is right, you should have read over the requirements before starting

xcarxcrashx | 9

#4026175 - Sunday 12 February 2012 20:51

No 43 but I but at least a hundred more people will post the EXACT same thing.

2ndSucks | 15

#4026177 - Sunday 12 February 2012 20:51

If we want to get our posts seen, we sure as hell do!

BeaterOfTheDrums | 15

#4026179 - Sunday 12 February 2012 20:51

Yes. Without it, the idiots will ask the same question in rapid succession.

Nixiechick | 3

#4026281 - Sunday 12 February 2012 21:30

Agreed

markrs | 0

#4026309 - Sunday 12 February 2012 21:47

Yeah! You should've read the requirements first! Glad everyone one of us is on the same page! :)

The_Tool1 | 13

#4026400 - Sunday 12 February 2012 22:29

Next time i would read the requirements first.

bizarre_ftw | 21

#4026444 - Sunday 12 February 2012 22:48

Does anyone else think the op should've read the requirements a tad more closely?

xcarxcrashx | 9

#4026911 - Monday 13 February 2012 2:20

*the second but should have been bet

I had to re-read it a couple of times to figure out what I meant.

capnbzarr | 43

#4029956 - Monday 13 February 2012 18:14

Or, in the parlance of our times, RTFM!

By ElricMustang | 23

#4025859 - Sunday 12 February 2012 19:12

YDI for not reading the requirements beforehand to make sure.

ScaughtieHolden | 11

#4026311 - Sunday 12 February 2012 21:47

I thumbed you up because you and #2 posted these at the same time.

TorturedXeno | 27

#4026550 - Sunday 12 February 2012 23:31

... and now YOU'RE getting thumbed down.

clumsychik | 1

#4026883 - Monday 13 February 2012 2:08

Srsly you guys!

By resshead | 0

#4025861 - Sunday 12 February 2012 19:12

Close enough.

crazychick1269 | 7

#4026045 - Sunday 12 February 2012 20:05

Your pic is creepy:/

HeartOnSleeves | 8

#4026069 - Sunday 12 February 2012 20:10

Your daughter is creepy.

MerrikBarbarian | 9

#4026160 - Sunday 12 February 2012 20:47

34- what the hell is creepy about ferrets?!?

CryMoreFMLs | 14

#4026346 - Sunday 12 February 2012 22:05

I have 3 ferrets and I love them dearly :)

bizarre_ftw | 21

#4026447 - Sunday 12 February 2012 22:50

FERRETS!!! ^_^
They're like Kinkajous :)

xcarxcrashx | 9

#4026917 - Monday 13 February 2012 2:23

34 your pic is ??? A sequined blob on top of highlighter colored hair??

crzysk8r | 0

#4026978 - Monday 13 February 2012 2:54

I just think the way that their all curled up is terrifying

By MelTheGreat | 23

#4025863 - Sunday 12 February 2012 19:12

Always read the fine print... or, in your case, just the print.

KyuuketsukiApple | 30

#4026575 - Sunday 12 February 2012 23:39

"small print" = small (but significant) details usually written in small letters

By 159_fml | 17

#4025866 - Sunday 12 February 2012 19:13

Ydi you should of read the requirements before starting

FinnishAmerican | 3

#4026236 - Sunday 12 February 2012 21:12

How many people need to say this? Lol geez.. Think of a unique comment

FinnishAmerican | 3

#4026403 - Sunday 12 February 2012 22:30

Double post, my phone was being dumb

bizarre_ftw | 21

#4026465 - Sunday 12 February 2012 22:59

I refer you to comment two and replies

Isoldael | 25

#4026503 - Sunday 12 February 2012 23:17

Check the times these comments were posted. It's likely they all wrote their comments when there was no similar comment yet. So no need to bash these people :)

laden_swallow09 | 34

#4027605 - Monday 13 February 2012 4:36

Here's a good reason to bash: it's SHOULD'VE, contraction of "should" and "have" respectively.

VeganVampyre | 26

#5471600 - Tuesday 30 April 2013 4:37

149- or just "should have"... Why the need for unnecessary contractions?

By toenibbler | 14

#4025869 - Sunday 12 February 2012 19:13

At least you'll have something to use next time you get a charcoal project.

crazy_whitechick | 6

#4027819 - Monday 13 February 2012 5:33

I worked really hard on a charcoal drawing just to find out that they will take any kind of art besides..... charcoal! Of course. They told me this 3 days before my audition.