FML : Today, I had a panic attack when a huge spider ran over my hand. I screamed, wailed, and killed it with a shoe while shouting. Ten minutes later, police...

Today, I had a panic attack when a huge spider ran over my hand. I screamed, wailed, and killed it with a shoe while shouting. Ten minutes later, police slammed on my door. My neighbor called them, saying it sounded like someone was being murdered. FML

I agree, your life sucks

You deserved it

By katchoo - / Sunday 3 November 2013 07:34 / Denmark

Animals

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Top comments

By Draconium | 8

#5740611 - Sunday 3 November 2013 15:33

Technically someone WAS being murdered. Spiders have feelings too. ;_:

By kitkat2701 | 18

#5740610 - Sunday 3 November 2013 15:33

That must've been awkward to explain...

Comments

By kitkat2701 | 18

#5740610 - Sunday 3 November 2013 15:33

That must've been awkward to explain...

puggypark | 14

#5740625 - Sunday 3 November 2013 15:38

The spiders will be coming for you OP

PuggieKid | 22

#5740687 - Sunday 3 November 2013 16:20

At least you have caring neighbours?..

justmeandmycatss | 9

#5740694 - Sunday 3 November 2013 16:26

umm… yes. "Your neighbor has a complaint about noses heard that sounded like someone was being murdered. May we come inside?"

"Uhhh…"

Sports_guy3 | 28

#5740711 - Sunday 3 November 2013 16:38

Someone WAS being murdered. ;-)

By Draconium | 8

#5740611 - Sunday 3 November 2013 15:33

Technically someone WAS being murdered. Spiders have feelings too. ;_:

TourettesGuyFTW | 25

#5740658 - Sunday 3 November 2013 15:56

In this case, the feeling is flatness.

caohm | 18

#5740659 - Sunday 3 November 2013 15:57

when a spider of any size is that close to anyone its just primal instincts say CRUSH! KILL IT! SMASH IT! until you pulverized it so bad you can't tell what it used to be.

KingreX32 | 21

#5740960 - Sunday 3 November 2013 20:09

spiders are the spawn of Satan.

swaggalikethat | 22

#5740973 - Sunday 3 November 2013 20:20

When you put it that way #2, then Op IS a murderer :0 CALL THE POLICE (again) THERE'S A MURDERER ON THE LOOSE!!!

154rct | 7

#5741004 - Sunday 3 November 2013 20:44

"Hey, my family is cold, can we sleep in your bed tonight? Or squish my wife...that's cool to."

Sports_guy3 | 28

#5742194 - Monday 4 November 2013 17:55

OP: "Why am I going to jail?! I didn't murder anybody!"

Police: "Yes you did. The spider."

Wizzlbang | 10

#5743060 - Tuesday 5 November 2013 9:45

Actually, the fear of spiders and most insects is a largely culturebound thing, largely restricted to the western world. Which is weird, considering that's where all the most harmless spiders are.

By omgomgomg_NO | 13

#5740615 - Sunday 3 November 2013 15:35

ah, the webs we weave...

ebonyirony | 29

#5740674 - Sunday 3 November 2013 16:09

"What a tangled web we weave"

Rainhawk94 | 27

#5740721 - Sunday 3 November 2013 16:50

Killjoy

Tikmysta | 16

#6350236 - Tuesday 14 July 2015 7:21

Oh no, you didn't
Brilliant!

By karatekid97 | 17

#5740617 - Sunday 3 November 2013 15:35

Okay, I feel like a follow up story is DEFINITELY needed here.

By Dracoboxer357 | 35

#5740622 - Sunday 3 November 2013 15:36

Confucius say no use cannon ball to kill mosquito.
The point? You over reacted. :p
At least using a cannon can justify having several minutes of drama attached to the actual act. ;P

Faff | 20

#5740901 - Sunday 3 November 2013 19:24

i feel like every single person on this site has anxiety.

whyisitme12 | 19

#5741383 - Monday 4 November 2013 3:14

Confucius is why I'm failing history, why does he have to be so complicated!!

By avi_7 | 9

#5740623 - Sunday 3 November 2013 15:37

poor spider

fakedsincerity | 32

#5741112 - Sunday 3 November 2013 23:30

incy wincy will climb up the water spout no more. RIP. :(

By awilliams44 | 9

#5740626 - Sunday 3 November 2013 15:39

No just the spider....

By transcedental | 18

#5740630 - Sunday 3 November 2013 15:40

I can imagine the white outline of the spider's tiny smashed legs.. and how the police officers examine the murder weapon. Heh-eh.. what's wrong with me.

Welshite | 39

#5740638 - Sunday 3 November 2013 15:47

Cause of death: blunt force trauma.

Aussieinusa | 5

#5740661 - Sunday 3 November 2013 15:58

I wonder if the police took Ops fingerprints?

Welshite | 39

#5740737 - Sunday 3 November 2013 17:06

They had to check the mandible records of the deceased so they could inform the family. Tragic, absolutely tragic.

KVKdragon | 26

#5745158 - Thursday 7 November 2013 2:18

I imagine a highly publicized trial will take place soon after. This is not a Stand Your Ground situation since the spider merely walked by without criminal intent or purpose and the OP killed it in cold blood ;)