By mmmretail - 25/05/2013 05:09 - Australia - Bairnsdale

Today, I had a customer tell me how much she regretted not aborting her expected child, how much she hates the father, and described to me in immense detail what it is like to pee while pregnant. All within the 30 seconds it took me to serve her. FML
I agree, your life sucks 47 971
You deserved it 3 289
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Top comments

guy24 9

She must if been talking very fast... Did she rap it to you?

183 7
MrSassypants 32

"Now let me tell you about my child, Wanted to have her aborted, 'cuz she wild, The father sucks, he looks like a duck, owns a shitty pick-up truck, and the pregnancy was terrible, the birth? Unbearable. The worst part was when I had to pee, Couldn't just sit down I had to lean, If I made a mess I would have to clean, It, yes, clean it all up, ******* smelled terrible; made me throw up, So what's up? I would like to order my meal, Chicken wings with fries, sounds like a nice deal, I would also like some coke, No ice 'cuz I easily choke, I'll also like some salad on the side, trying to watch my weight, I'm not trying fat up again 'cuz I'm on a date."

176 6

Comments

guy24 9

She must if been talking very fast... Did she rap it to you?

183 7
xlord 27

When you're in retail time goes slow enough for everyone to tell you their entire life story....unless you're on break, then it's over in 2 minutes.

37 1
MrSassypants 32

"Now let me tell you about my child, Wanted to have her aborted, 'cuz she wild, The father sucks, he looks like a duck, owns a shitty pick-up truck, and the pregnancy was terrible, the birth? Unbearable. The worst part was when I had to pee, Couldn't just sit down I had to lean, If I made a mess I would have to clean, It, yes, clean it all up, ******* smelled terrible; made me throw up, So what's up? I would like to order my meal, Chicken wings with fries, sounds like a nice deal, I would also like some coke, No ice 'cuz I easily choke, I'll also like some salad on the side, trying to watch my weight, I'm not trying fat up again 'cuz I'm on a date."

176 6
Cartera 10

45 - That was way more than 30 seconds.

48 3
rg350dx 29

46. It was OP's rap retort to the customers 30 second spit. Or just a floating omniscient rapping narrator for the encounter.

15 1
rg350dx 29

I'm gunna shoot some shit. Only got 30 seconds with my waiter. I'm, I'm, I'm blunt an' lookin for a sum up. This is ******* awkward. Walk up to my table like What up? I got a big gut. Nah, I'm just pregnant. I got some sperm from a shit pop. Sittin on the toilet is so damn nasty. I be like, damn, it really hurts when I go pee.

5 25
MichellinMan 20

Did I just read the entire first Harry Potter book?

5 20
Glitter_taco_ 10

#45 that may just be the longest comment I've ever rapped in my mind

19 1
fareith 15

45 - I'm sure your comment was amusing, but frankly, I am far too lazy to read it all!

28 1
MissCharlotte_fml 26

70, you dont have to read it... it is much more fun to rap it

1 1
adamo_erebus 26

She must speak really fast for her to divulge so much info in half a minute.

45 3
Lacist 19

Well it must be pretty easy to say, "Hey, I was pregnant it was hard to pee it was like a (insert sensation here), and I honestly should have aborted her because I hate the father he's a bitch."

12 1
hama806 19

Some people don't know how to spare others their life details.

35 4
Welshite 39

Hey, I love spilling my life story to random people. Unfortunately, they usually start running when I begin to sob and scream "I just want someone to love," and try to grab them in a hug.

26 1
SalviBarbie 15

Some just don't deserve to reproduce..

4 7
calipilot227 16

I work as a cashier at a retail store. You would be surprised how often this happens.

5 1
howdeedoo 22

She should get a job reading the terms and conditions at the end of commercials

134 2
nietzche 8

You should have told her how it feels to pee when you have a boner Seems legit

8 31
buckeyed 20

actually, it's hard for women to pee when aroused/post-****** as well

26 4
howdeedoo 22

11-Still, I think the lady would already know how that feels

7 2
Ameel_fml 19

#11 Is it? Peeing is the only thing I feel like doing post-******. lol

16 1
erockinthesuburb 17

11 - it's not that it is hard to pee, but rather the trajectory and aim are completely effed up.

5 2
buckeyed 20

really? it usually takes me a second to get going after haha but it is a good thing to do post-sex! (no utis)

6 3
buckeyed 20

what kind of service prompted that response?

17 3
SmittyJA24 26

I'll guess: she didn't like the food or your service & hated the restaurant as well.

5 1
challan 19

wow, F the childs life. I feel so bad for him or her. I would have recommended adoption.

59 4
perdix 29

You should have served her decaf.

29 4