Today, I found out my ex boyfriend is still obsessed with me. Apparently he named his dog after me and talks to her like she's a real person. FML
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By
myusername83
| 10
Does he kiss the dog like she's you, too?
By
junkman6
| 22
I once named a Pokemon after an ex girlfriend... Of course it was magikarp denoting how much of a "dead fish" she was in bed.
COMMENTS
By
challan
| 19
maybe he just thinks you're a bitch.
Reply
JMichael
| 25
At least when he gives the dog commands it'll obey.
Reply
perdix
| 29
#1, I guess to be a first, the your/you're/yore distinction has to slide. I know you know better :D
Reply
perdix
| 29
#29, thanks, Didi! challan nailed me a couple days ago about my grammar slip-ups, so I just wanted to tease her playfully in return ;)
Reply
challan
| 19
Perdix, my friend, if my phone has messed with me, I apologize. I don't believe I have ever picked on you at all!!!
Reply
ahippienamedrae
| 10
Aw man I was going to make that joke. ):
Reply
Kamon97
| 23
Haha #1 has a great point maybe I should get a dog and name her after my cheating ex :p
Reply
perdix
| 29
#51, it was the one where the boyfriend dumped the OP with the mother giving him tips. I screwed up at least twice in my comment, and you pointed that out. Don't worry, I know with you it is all in good fun (as is my "picking" on you) ;)
Reply
challan
| 19
you even remember which one?! I'm going to need to write a stalking fml about you...
Reply
happyevil
| 10
Naming the dog after you, that's weird, but talking to the dog like it is an actual person isn't that bad... I do it all the time. The good part is he can't tell me to shut up. :)
By
anonymous_kenie
| 7
Hey, you're admired
Reply
anonymous_kenie
| 7
Fuck you
Reply
JMichael
| 25
Really number 6?? I think that was a little uncalled for.
By
myusername83
| 10
Does he kiss the dog like she's you, too?
Reply
xBethanyC
| 15
I really hope they don't do more than that..
Reply
bellebe1998
| 16
oh god. tmi...
By
ZY1431
| 24
well thats a bit much.
By
perdix
| 29
Or he talked to you like you were a dog?
Reply
perdix
| 29
Come to think of it, I talk very sweetly to my dog. If I talked to women that way, I'd probably get licked and humped a lot more :)
Reply
murdersquirrel
| 15
my first thought was "but I talk to my cat like she's a real person, why is that weird?"
By
Cupcake_kid
| 5
Hopefully he won't start stalking you.
Reply
killthedead
| 13
What's wrong with stalking someone?
Reply
Jasmeent11
| 15
I think it sounds so creepy already, wouldn't be surprised if he did.
By
kinky44
| 28
Doggy style?
Reply
thatnucca
| 36
Since the romantic aspect failed, the poor lad's trying to get a best friend out of the situation...
Reply
TwiztedYuri
| 9
bestiality jokes... haha
Reply
thatnucca
| 36
Aren't dogs supposed to be man's best friend? Dirty minded people... Lol
By
junkman6
| 22
I once named a Pokemon after an ex girlfriend... Of course it was magikarp denoting how much of a "dead fish" she was in bed.
Reply
Nohman
| 14
That's a little Farfetch'd.
Reply
MidnaLink
| 32
Kinda fails when the stupid things evolve though!
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gracehi
| 31
So she seemed nice and harmless at first, and then she transformed into a terrifying monster?
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MidnaLink
| 32
lol
Reply
Radayam
| 13
I named my Ditto after my girlfriend after I found out that she had been sleeping with everyone. :(
Reply
chosha_fml
| 25
#11 Maybe you just didn't know how to bring her to life?
Reply
Puffgurl
| 6
44 That sounds like me xD
Reply
Derp_Jerpinson
| 2
Well tbh #10 even if shes a dead magikarp in bed, ALL women know the splash attack....the trick is getting them to use it in battle lol
By
mangobbler
| 11
I don't want to jinx it, but unless he does it already, stalking will get on that list of odd behaviour. Be prepared OP.
By
zahidnasir
| 22
welcome to the bitch-zone