By MoRuined - South Africa - Johannesburg Today, I found my first grey hair. How? My boyfriend stopped in the middle of sex to point it out. FML I agree, your life sucks 39147 You deserved it 3857 63 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Ophelia - United States - Albuquerque Today, I was so bored with my job at McDonald's that I actually hoped someone would come in and make a huge mess for me to clean. No one did. FML I agree, your life sucks 23323 You deserved it 4097 111 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - Croatia - Zagreb Today, my wife paid a man with a fake crystal and an even faker accent to investigate the creakiness of our apartment complex floors. $300 later, she told me he'd found a "sinkhole of chi energy" and that the building may collapse if we don't pay him to disperse it. I want a divorce. FML I agree, your life sucks 31349 You deserved it 3392 62 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States - Cypress Today, my mom mentioned how she loves certain actor's "British" accent. I couldn't help but mention that there's no such thing, and that there are lots of different accents in Britain. She got pissed and lectured me for "lying" to her and trying to make her feel stupid. FML I agree, your life sucks 34543 You deserved it 20256 71 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Shauna - United States - Jacksonville Today, it was my birthday. I finally got the PS3 I've been asking for, for a long time. When I opened the box, I didn't find a PS3, but a bunch of clothes that my mom put in my brother's PS3 box. FML I agree, your life sucks 28922 You deserved it 4171 178 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By notattractiveatall - Australia - Newcastle Today, two girls came up to me on the street and asked if they could take a photo with me for their high school scavenger hunt, because they needed a picture with a stranger. One of the girls shook her head and said to the other, "It needs to be an attractive stranger" and walked away. FML I agree, your life sucks 25679 You deserved it 1749 61 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States - South Salem Today, I heard the ice cream truck. Being the idiot that I am, I ran down the steps and almost immediately fell down them. I needed four stitches. I didn't even get my ice cream. FML I agree, your life sucks 22996 You deserved it 9542 96 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By mosaicevolution - United States - Decatur Today, after finishing my second glass of wine, I walked out of the bathroom and saw the tag on my hair dryer from last year's rehab visit. FML I agree, your life sucks 23168 You deserved it 16817 80 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By shitface - United States - Arlington Shared towel Today, after I took a shower, I was wiping my face with the towel I share with my sister. It smelled peculiar, so I took my face away and looked at it. Turns out, I was wiping my face on a huge shit stain. FML I agree, your life sucks 1974 You deserved it 1174 14 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By raaquel - United States Today, I found out my boyfriend of 5 years has been cheating on me with a Realtor. The same Realtor who helped me sell my condo so I could move in with my boyfriend. FML I agree, your life sucks 34004 You deserved it 2993 49 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Jason - United States Today, I spent forty minutes trying to break into my own house after being locked out. After finally getting in through a small unlocked window, I discovered my keys in my pants pocket. FML I agree, your life sucks 9704 You deserved it 44249 102 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By its dark - United States - San Francisco Today, it's day three of our power being off because of a glitch in the power company's computer system. They won't turn it back on until we pay the $2000 we owe from 2010. We moved here in 2012. FML I agree, your life sucks 22242 You deserved it 1292 43 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - France Today, I'm still in love with my ex boyfriend who is going out with someone else. But at least I now know that he's gay. FML I agree, your life sucks 38554 You deserved it 4337 38 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By dibman - United Kingdom Today, at work, I was asked to sharpen some pencils. I'm an electronics and mechanics engineer, and while I understand it's been quite a while since I was in primary school, I still wonder why my boss felt the need to explain in minute detail how to sharpen a pencil. FML I agree, your life sucks 27629 You deserved it 2942 79 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Overflow - United States Today, I was desperate to teach my 2-year old to use her potty. I had to pee, and thought maybe she would learn by watching me use it. Everything was going well, until I realized that I had a long pee. So long that it overfilled her potty all over. FML I agree, your life sucks 16223 You deserved it 62977 125 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - Canada Today, I saw my girlfriend going into my best friend's dorm room and suspected her to cheat on me so I placed a camera in his room to spy on them. In the end, I discovered that my girlfriend has problems in math and both my best friend and brother are gay. FML I agree, your life sucks 20745 You deserved it 83110 151 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By pi_power_15 - United States - Spring Grove Today, my football practice ended early due to severe weather. Not only had I misplaced my phone earlier in the day, both my parents thought the other had picked me up. I was in the rain for an hour and a half. FML I agree, your life sucks 23653 You deserved it 2808 48 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Skazzy3 Today, I got banned from my school library after I ran after a guy who stole my bag. FML I agree, your life sucks 32889 You deserved it 2215 47 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Cheesey_Dorito Today, I couldn't find the keys to open the store I work at. The resulting stress gave me chest pains that ended up sending me to the hospital. I still missed work and my father found the keys under the passenger seat in his car. The same seat I sat in on the way to the hospital. FML I agree, your life sucks 2490 You deserved it 472 7 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United Arab Emirates - Dubai Today, I found out that my classmates hate me so much that they have a seating arrangement where people have to sit next to me on a rotating basis. A fight broke out yesterday because someone tried to skip their turn. FML I agree, your life sucks 63155 You deserved it 17437 145 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By myboyfriendisweird - United States - Phoenix Today, after having sex with my boyfriend, we were cuddling when he grabbed his penis and made it say, "That was amazing! Thank you for the sex." He's 21 years old. FML I agree, your life sucks 31159 You deserved it 6636 133 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States - Athena Today, the car across the street has been broken into so many times that my parrot has started to mimic its car alarm. FML I agree, your life sucks 21839 You deserved it 1711 34 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Burnt - United States Today, I accidentally set my hair on fire while lighting a cigarette. I panicked and put it out by slapping myself in the face. FML I agree, your life sucks 10726 You deserved it 60855 270 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By erin - France Today, I met a guy online, and I realized the cyber sex I had with him was better than the sex I get from my boyfriend. FML I agree, your life sucks 9256 You deserved it 33556 202 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Amb - United States Today, I realized my boyfriend makes the same noises in bed as he does when he's winning in Call of Duty. FML I agree, your life sucks 39929 You deserved it 6163 179 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By lolomg - New Zealand Today, my dad met my fiancé's dad for the first time. My fiancé's dad is a cop. He had arrested my dad for indecent exposure in the past. FML I agree, your life sucks 40380 You deserved it 3041 103 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States - Ellicott City Today, in the middle of sex, my girlfriend yelled, "STUFF ME LIKE A TURKEY!" I couldn't finish. FML I agree, your life sucks 64508 You deserved it 8132 156 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Unlucky. - United States Today, I took my parking permit off my car to debate a ticket that I got for not having my permit displayed. Twenty minutes later, when I got back to my car, I had another ticket on my window for not having my parking permit displayed because I was using it to disprove the first ticket. FML I agree, your life sucks 31838 You deserved it 8044 35 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States Today, I was sitting in the living room with my husband when we heard a baby coo. This would have been adorable, if we had a baby. FML I agree, your life sucks 20679 You deserved it 1451 72 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By phansmootchie - United States Today, I lost my keys. My roommate locked me out, then yelled at me when I made her come home to let me in. I tore my room apart searching for them, and even went out to search my locker room. When I got home, I glanced at my wall only to find my keys hanging on the hook I set up specifically for them. FML I agree, your life sucks 8277 You deserved it 37311 59 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By rice_cake - Australia Today, I was sitting at a bus stop and a guy stops in front of me and says "Oh very nice. How much?" I reply "You couldn't afford me." An old guy sitting next to me says "I bet I could" and puts his hand on my leg. I forfeited the bus and walked home in the rain. FML I agree, your life sucks 59081 You deserved it 25937 213 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States - Santa Barbara Today, my husband and I had some bath time to ourselves. After having sex, he decided to put bath salts in my vagina to spice things up for the next round. It's been twenty minutes out of the bath and it still feels like there are pop rocks in my vagina. FML I agree, your life sucks 50487 You deserved it 36856 235 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By allwaysbuggedinheaven - United States Today, I returned home to find out that my new and very expensive computer had overheated. I confronted my mom, and she told me that she had covered up the fan because she didn't like the noise. FML I agree, your life sucks 61287 You deserved it 3670 227 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By dadsadipshit - United States Today, my dad lost his mind over the meteorite incident in Russia. He's convinced that it's part of some big government conspiracy to cover up a UFO crash-landing, and now he won't stop dismissively calling us "sheep" and telling us "do the research" just because we don't agree with him. FML I agree, your life sucks 28297 You deserved it 3181 109 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By xJade2012x - United States Ouch Today, in my karate dojo, I was being taught how to fall properly. My sensei instructed us not to fall with our hands out because it could sprain our wrists. As I was getting ready to help demonstrate a backwards break fall, I actually fell over. Guess where my hands went. FML I agree, your life sucks 13916 You deserved it 20551 97 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - Canada Today, I shaved my legs and pits for the first time this summer. It took 3 disposable razors and an hour to get the job done. I've clearly been single for far too long. FML I agree, your life sucks 16821 You deserved it 47132 294 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Jaymz Today, I went to my son's final band performance. I also have a busy toddler, so I ended up watching most of the performance in the hallway on a tv monitor. In the middle of the awards ceremony, my toddler pulled the fire alarm. Everyone had to evacuate the building. FML I agree, your life sucks 3264 You deserved it 2242 30 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - Reserved Today, my boyfriend called me as I was getting ready for bed and asked me to pick him up from the bar. Being a loving girlfriend I drive the 45 minutes; when I get there his friend informs me he left about 45 minutes ago. FML I agree, your life sucks 37309 You deserved it 5176 89 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By garfwebba - United States Today, it's my birthday. My boyfriend didn't get me a present. He did, however, get me a card from our cat. He signed it "Have a purrrrfect birthday." Then he left to go to work. I was alone all day long. FML I agree, your life sucks 28370 You deserved it 6586 159 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 15/2/2021 05:01 College life is hell Today, my crush came up to me at a college party and said "I like you." I tried to be cool and said sarcastically, "Thank you. I like myself too. That was a wonderful prank." He was amazed, and asked me how I knew it was a prank. FML I agree, your life sucks 1131 You deserved it 168 4 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By 4yrldkicker - United States Today, I was at the mall and someone peeked their head under the door of my dressing room while I was half dressed. Not knowing who it was, I kicked him in the face just out of instinct. Its was a 4 year old kid looking for his mother. FML I agree, your life sucks 57638 You deserved it 23442 299 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By UnidentifiedFun | 37 #6085214 - Thursday 9 October 2014 16:02 Well where was the grey hair...? Send a private message 111 7 Reply
By darwinism | 30 #6085228 - Thursday 9 October 2014 16:08 Next time you are having sex and he is really close to finishing, stop and ask him if he thinks red will be a good colour to cover up your grey hair. Send a private message 52 4 Reply
By JMichael | 25 #6085206 - Thursday 9 October 2014 15:59 Must not be that satisfying if he's bored enough to point out grey hairs. Send a private message 24 43 Reply
Reply MrConcise | 34 #6085268 - Thursday 9 October 2014 16:45 He's probably trying not to climax too early because OP is smoking hot. I'm definitely into cougars. ;) Send a private message 5 30 Reply
Reply Rulerray97 | 25 #6085321 - Thursday 9 October 2014 17:34 You had one job. Give sympathy or at least a funny comment. Aanndd you fucked up -.- Send a private message 40 7 Reply
Reply devildog562 | 33 #6085354 - Thursday 9 October 2014 18:09 At #16 Who says she's a cougar? I have some Greys in my beard and in 26... Send a private message 29 3 Reply
Reply GentlemanBastard | 15 #6085355 - Thursday 9 October 2014 18:10 Why is sympathy ranked over a funny comment? This is what's wrong with FML. Send a private message 13 20 Reply
Reply foxwasalamb | 24 #6085382 - Thursday 9 October 2014 18:48 @27, my boyfriend was 17 and has white hair, white eyelashes, and white in his beard sporadically Send a private message 5 7 Reply
Reply devildog562 | 33 #6085396 - Thursday 9 October 2014 19:03 Just realized I said in 26, I swear I'm not in 26. I'm 26 ** Send a private message 4 6 Reply
Reply zarosian | 17 #6085676 - Friday 10 October 2014 3:10 You dated Santa? :o Send a private message 3 6 Reply
By Erto | 17 #6085208 - Thursday 9 October 2014 16:00 I have a dig bick You that read wrong You read that wrong too You read that again to make sure I'm not fucking with you Send a private message 1 6 Reply
Reply JMichael | 25 #6085212 - Thursday 9 October 2014 16:02 How is this relevant to the FML? Send a private message 2 0 Reply
By UnidentifiedFun | 37 #6085214 - Thursday 9 October 2014 16:02 Well where was the grey hair...? Send a private message 111 7 Reply
Reply sayyestothedress | 24 #6086304 - Friday 10 October 2014 23:05 You should point out what a small dick he has! Send a private message 1 10 Reply
By snoopy325 | 23 #6085215 - Thursday 9 October 2014 16:02 At least he's comfortable with you. My husband stops if he thinks he sees a pimple somewhere and I have to remind him it's not the time. Send a private message 7 24 Reply
Reply ChristianH39 | 30 #6085262 - Thursday 9 October 2014 16:38 Because you've never had a pimple right? Send a private message 40 4 Reply
Reply cjwayy | 22 #6085276 - Thursday 9 October 2014 16:54 Yes because pimples aren't a natural thing that happens to the vast majority of humans, it's "nasty" Send a private message 26 3 Reply
By devildog562 | 33 #6085217 - Thursday 9 October 2014 16:03 Did he pull the hair in a sexy way ? Send a private message 34 9 Reply
Reply Enslaved | 36 #6085397 - Thursday 9 October 2014 19:06 Ha, and if it had 50 shades, he would have pulled the hair right out of its root! Send a private message 15 4 Reply
By iireenee | 23 #6085226 - Thursday 9 October 2014 16:07 That's an awfull thing to hear! I really hope he keeps that to himself at those moments next time! Goodluck with your hair! Send a private message 5 15 Reply
By darwinism | 30 #6085228 - Thursday 9 October 2014 16:08 Next time you are having sex and he is really close to finishing, stop and ask him if he thinks red will be a good colour to cover up your grey hair. Send a private message 52 4 Reply
Reply EverestMelting | 23 #6085271 - Thursday 9 October 2014 16:46 What if he's into that? Send a private message 2 10 Reply
Reply WolfyGrace | 24 #6085480 - Thursday 9 October 2014 21:06 Remind me how that's a bad thing, 17. Because I'm pretty sure it isn't bad if OP's boyfriend is into red strands/streaks of hair if she has it. Send a private message 6 1 Reply
By annarcheer | 19 #6085231 - Thursday 9 October 2014 16:09 wow now I see what he was focused on. Send a private message 1 16 Reply
Reply cdawg69 | 10 #6085477 - Thursday 9 October 2014 20:57 juzt stop.... Send a private message 2 6 Reply
By BadApple88 | 29 #6085241 - Thursday 9 October 2014 16:13 Well as long as the sex was good... Send a private message 9 4 Reply
Reply Goblin182 | 26 #6085430 - Thursday 9 October 2014 19:43 I'm thinking that if the sex were good he wouldn't have noticed a grey hair. Send a private message 8 1 Reply
Reply devildog562 | 33 #6085593 - Friday 10 October 2014 0:05 Maybe the hair was right in his face. Think about it ... Send a private message 3 3 Reply
By worldclassrager | 39 #6085254 - Thursday 9 October 2014 16:19 Would ya look at that... Send a private message 3 8 Reply
Today, I started to cry while masturbating. This isn't the first time that this has happened. FML I agree, your life sucks 107 You deserved it 42 3 Comments
Today, I woke up with a sore clitoris. I haven't had sex with my boyfriend for weeks, but I did masturbate yesterday. I guess I can't get horny without... I agree, your life sucks 330 You deserved it 69 4 Comments