Miscellaneous: Today, I found a letter in the postbox at my new flat which ran...

By Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I found a letter in the postbox at my new flat which ran something along these lines of: "Hi. We're the gas company. You owe us £1,229.79 and have 7 days to pay us. Lotsa love, dated 7th September." FML

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Miscellaneous

Triage

Get the message, dude

How could you forget?

By Anonymous - 24/11/2020 03:31 - India - Bangalore

Don't hate the player…

Today, I went on a Tinder date with a guy who insisted that I go with him to his friend's house party to meet people and socialize, as I'm new to the city. When I got there, I realised he had invited two other girls as his date as well. FML

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915

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129

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By needanewphone - United States

Today, while I was getting ready to take a shower, I placed my phone on the counter next to the toilet. While I was washing my hair, someone called me. My phone was on vibrate, so I didn't hear it until it vibrated off the counter and into the toilet. FML

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18881

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By sleekRelease

Today, I was expecting an important delivery for a party I'm having tonight. I was in the shower when the doorbell rang. In my haste, I slipped and ended up with a bunch of little cuts and bruises. Turns out, it was someone trying to leave a note saying it would be delivered tomorrow. FML

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1663

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By Anonymous

Today, I was at an outdoor market with my family. We'd had dinner and were about to leave when 2 women stood next to our table, smoking. We called out to let them know they could have it, as we were leaving. They thought we were complaining about the smoke. They yelled at us and stormed off, while the other tables stared. FML

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1352

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By Anonymous - United States - Burlington

Today, my girlfriend was making lunch and asked me to pass her the peanut butter. I'll never know why, but as I handed it to her I said the first thing that came to mind: "I really want a dog." She looked at me in horror, then told me to get out of her house. FML

I agree, your life sucks

29018

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By liberatedwoman - Oman

Today, my mother sat me down to tell me that since coming home from college, I sounded like "a liberated woman". She was disappointed and disturbed by this and said that I should stop having strong opinions and ideals because it would make finding a husband for me difficult. FML

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55975

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By jerdub93 - United States

Today, I was eating cereal while absentmindedly reading the box. I was amused when I found it expires on my birthday. Then I realized it expired on my birthday two years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks

18071

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By hobosarea-holes - United States

Today, I picked up a penny off the street for good luck on my job interview. A few seconds later, a hobo beat me up, took my wallet, and ran off. The whole ordeal made me late for the interview. So much for good luck. FML

I agree, your life sucks

31159

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By pipefitter28 - Canada - Vernon

Today, I tried to impress a girl at the gym on the squat rack, but let out a big fart. She was grossed out and laughed at me with her friends. Her boyfriend came over and told me I was a dead man, and I'd better leave. I'm now the proud owner of a year membership at a gym I can't go to. FML

I agree, your life sucks

22074

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By afraidofcans - United States - Stafford

Today, after years of being terrified of those biscuit cans that pop when you unwrap them, I finally decided I'd open one myself. I'm sitting in the hospital with a sliced hand from the lid and can feel therapy in my future. FML

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23696

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By justmyluck5150 - United States

Today, I told the doctor that one of my ribs sticks out farther than the other. When I lifted my shirt to show him, he immediately laughed and said, "Whoa, that's not subtle is it!" As if I wasn't already insecure about it. FML

I agree, your life sucks

11124

You deserved it

825

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By kp - Australia

Today, it was my boyfriend's birthday. After spending a reasonable amount of cash to get us a nice hotel room to celebrate, he decides he would rather spend the night drinking with his friends. They all threw up in the bath tub before passing out on our bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks

30036

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By MedStudent90 - United States - Saint Paul

Today, my son got in trouble at school. The kids had to solve a problem by determining whether it was better for "Edna" to repair or replace her AC unit. He said Edna is an "old person's name" and she was "probably going to die soon anyway", so she shouldn't do either. FML

I agree, your life sucks

31994

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By Jess

Today, I called a doctor's office for a referral. I was in public, so when she asked me what type of issue I had, I mumbled that I had a vaginal issue. After painstakingly having to repeat this several times, she said she was asking what kind of insurance I have. FML

I agree, your life sucks

23696

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By Project-Mayhem - United States

Today, my family went to the Christmas tree farm, and cut down the perfect tree. When we got home we put the kids down for a nap and took some time to relax. We went out to the truck to bring the tree into the house, it was gone. Someone stole my Christmas tree from my driveway in broad daylight. FML

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33387

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By Anonymous - United States

Today, my nine year old stepson overheard me telling my husband that I was almost out of my favorite shampoo, and since it was discontinued, I couldn't buy any more. He got in the shower and happily emptied the bottles down the drain. FML

I agree, your life sucks

31984

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By troll of a gran - United States - Oklahoma City

Today, I took my grandma to what I thought was a nice movie. An actor used the word "cunt", which prompted her to ask what that word meant in a loud "whisper". She followed up even more loudly with, "Does that mean pussy?" FML

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35750

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By Anonymous - United States - Ridge

Today, I had to take my son to the ER after he badly messed up trying to light his farts on fire. FML

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23551

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3043

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By PNeil

Time wasting

Today, after having spent all of last night studying for an algebra test, I find out that the test was on a completely different chapter of my textbook. FML

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1131

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By katchoo - Denmark

Today, I had a panic attack when a huge spider ran over my hand. I screamed, wailed, and killed it with a shoe while shouting. Ten minutes later, police slammed on my door. My neighbor called them, saying it sounded like someone was being murdered. FML

I agree, your life sucks

47453

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By Bliggins - Canada - Winnipeg

Today, someone very close to me came out of the closet. Normally I would fully support them, had we not just gotten married. FML

I agree, your life sucks

44873

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By BrownDump - United States

Today, I was taking a dump and I pushed so hard that I got light headed and passed out on the floor. FML

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41242

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14157

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By Dsark - United States - San Diego

Today, during a lecture, my teacher jokingly talked about the time he was best buds with George Washington. Another student then asked, "Really? You knew him?" I'm in an advanced placement U.S. history class. FML

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44233

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By anonymus - United States

Today, I asked a woman where her beautiful accent was from. The woman stared at me for a while. Then her daughter told me that the reason her mother talked like that was because she had a stroke a few months ago. FML

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53777

You deserved it

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By Tallie

Today, I fell down the stairs, breaking my foot and tendons. It was the first time I had ever broken anything, and the doctor said that it's the most complicated break he'd ever seen. It's too complicated to operate. Now I'm stuck in a wheelchair for god knows how long. FML

I agree, your life sucks

3100

You deserved it

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By Greenpuppy416 - 4/7/2020 05:02

Bad date #3764

Today, I had a date at a formal restaurant I'm well known at. My date showed up two and a half hours late with a jogging suit on, and then got mad at me for ordering, eating, and paying without him. FML

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1703

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125

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By FootFlakes - United States - Boston

Today, I had to explain to my girlfriend once again that the dry skin she picks off her feet belong in the trash, not on our coffee table. FML

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By Disappointed

Today, my teenage daughter asked me to buy her the morning after pill, saying "It's for my acne." FML

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40687

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5098

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By anonymous - United States - Vacaville

Today, my boyfriend was giving me a back massage while I was laying on my stomach. A few minutes into it, he stopped. I turned around to see why; he was taking a picture of my butt. FML

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34020

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7593

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By sadsadperson - Australia

Today, I lied to my diary about getting laid. FML

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44814

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By Nightbird827

Today, a police officer pulled me over. He asked me where I was headed, so I jokingly replied, "Probably to jail after you run my name". He laughed and took my information, only to then arrest me for unpaid parking tickets I never received. FML

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21903

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By newhostess - United States

Today, I was training for my new job at a restaurant. As part of training, they give you free food so you know what to reccommend, and the dish I got was really good. Eight hours later I saw it again while I was puking; I got food poisoning from my own place of work. FML

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53832

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By Anonymous - United States

Today, I went indoor rock climbing with my uncle and his 5 year-old girl. I'm about halfway up the hardest ascent when my arm cramps up. As I stretched my arm, my cousin yells up at me in her tiny voice, "Prove you're a man and climb that wall!" I fell off. I was emasculated by a 5 year-old. FML

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24517

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By mybackhurts

Today, my doctor ordered me an EKG to help my health anxiety. I have panic attacks and feel like my heart is out of rhythm, but my doctors have all told me it’s just in my head. I got the test results. I meet with the cardiologist next week to discuss surgery. FML

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4811

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By Anonymous - United States

Today, I was running the drive-thru window at work, when a man pulled up with his dog in the seat next to him. As he was counting out his change, the dog leaned over his hand and drooled all over it. Not only did he pay exclusively in coins, those coins were slimy from dog drool. FML

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27830

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By Kevin

Today, while at an important meeting at work, I got to watch helplessly as a police officer gave me a parking meter ticket. Added to that my boss chewed me out for "never paying attention and staring out the window during meetings". FML

I agree, your life sucks

25429

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By baconrash - United States

Today, I found out that the acne under my arms was worse then the severe acne on my face. FML

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29796

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3668

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By Telley21 - United States - Rexburg

He had to find out eventually!

Today, I made my boyfriend a beautiful dinner of seafood and rice. This was the first time I could afford lobster, and thought it would be a great treat for us both. I learned that this was the first time he has eaten lobster, and he learned that he is allergic. FML

I agree, your life sucks

7105

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By Anonymous

House rules

Today, I had a date with a guy I've had a crush on for months. Not knowing where the date would take us, I shaved my pubic hair. Later, in the middle of making out with the guy, my dad storms into the room to tell me, "I had to get some Draino, your pubes clogged the shower." FML

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2027

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By APersonSomewhere

Today, it’s my 21st birthday. The people I invited over spent most of the time talking about their LARP group which I am not a part of and so could not participate, talked over what I wanted to watch, and then it ended with an intervention by them for me because they were upset that I was upset. FML

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Top comments

By shuttuplily | 0

#603248 - Sunday 4 October 2009 20:07

Did they spray it with perfume and make a lipstick kissy mark at the bottom too?

By alwaysalady | 0

#603329 - Sunday 4 October 2009 20:23

its not verbatim, he paraphrased, humorously. Its probably fro the previous tennents. That sucks

COMMENTS

By JohnE3 | 0

#603234 - Sunday 4 October 2009 20:05

You got the cash, right?

iKaite | 0

#603283 - Sunday 4 October 2009 20:12

But its the 4th of October. Nearly a month late. Im guessing it was a fake letter.

seanreddog | 4

#603288 - Sunday 4 October 2009 20:13

YDI FOR NOT BEING AMERICAN!!!

Sue! Sue! Sue!... Where is Sue, anyway?

polkadot1196 | 0

#603306 - Sunday 4 October 2009 20:18

See, this means it is a fake letter, which means DON'T pay them!

the_stereotype | 0

#603675 - Sunday 4 October 2009 23:55

agreed. it's probably a prank letter. it's even written like one.

mohomonopoly | 0

#603896 - Monday 5 October 2009 1:34

Im so sick of seeing FML's from other countries!! I just cant relate to them, why cant they all just be from america..

Kylias | 6

#603961 - Monday 5 October 2009 2:04

... I hope you're not serious, #58.

pingpongpickle | 8

#1021956 - Monday 7 June 2010 0:03

what did 58 say??

By shuttuplily | 0

#603248 - Sunday 4 October 2009 20:07

Did they spray it with perfume and make a lipstick kissy mark at the bottom too?

By xshyguyx | 0

#603249 - Sunday 4 October 2009 20:07

When did you move in? Cuz you probably should have checked the mail back then instead of waiting about a month later to realize you're overdue

kyliebear | 15

#4941388 - Monday 17 September 2012 13:04

#3 It's fake..lol.

By fringle | 0

#603268 - Sunday 4 October 2009 20:10

uh oh

By pwnrzero | 0

#603274 - Sunday 4 October 2009 20:11

meh. if this is from the previous person, the not FYL worthy

By MaxOfMetal | 0

#603279 - Sunday 4 October 2009 20:12

And what did they say when you called them? Was your NAME on the account? Think before you say you're doomed.

By sweetspicegirl | 0

#603295 - Sunday 4 October 2009 20:15

i dont get it

sayyestothedress | 24

#6062743 - Friday 12 September 2014 3:50

Me either

By dnlphm94 | 0

#603297 - Sunday 4 October 2009 20:15

Lotsa love? What company ends a letter with something like that? I say the letter is fake. They're trying to scam you.

DoomJeff91 | 2

#603304 - Sunday 4 October 2009 20:17

Are you serious dude? Do you not get the humor that the OP is using? Reread it please.

rosierosierosie | 0

#603309 - Sunday 4 October 2009 20:18

so much fail in one post

powertoast_3000 | 6

#1775431 - Wednesday 1 December 2010 0:10

someone who FINALLY gets this!! it's so irritating "ooh t's fake if it says lotsa love" for god's sake...

By rabidcactus | 0

#603299 - Sunday 4 October 2009 20:15

http://all-the-exgirlfriends.info/?uid=30394

By alwaysalady | 0

#603329 - Sunday 4 October 2009 20:23

its not verbatim, he paraphrased, humorously. Its probably fro the previous tennents. That sucks