By anon17 - 18/03/2010 13:49 - United States
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what an asshole...sorry OP sometimes it's the people who we luv most which hurt in the worst possible way. :-(
OP, money is only money and can be earned/replaced again. However, time is something that you can't back. Consider yourself lucky for finding out before you actually married this guy and just walk away now. Clearly, the two of you have different opinions on what the commitment level of your relationship should be. So, don't waist anymore of your precious time on him!
oh no he didn't! wait, the love of your life is a new found asshole and you're complaining about the cost of the reception? girl, priorities, hello! straighten them please.
Sometimes, it's easier to focus on being angry about the loss of money instead of dwelling on the fact that the guy you thought you were going to marry just broke your heart. Even though I broke my engagement off, it was still something so incredibly devastating to me. It was definitely easier to focus on figuring out if we could get any money back or use it some other way instead of focusing on the fact that my relationship had just ended.
I know! Use the reception site for a "Newly Single" party to celebrate getting rid of him. Tell all your girl friends to come and bring all their single guy friends. Then you'll see that there are plenty more fish in the sea and have plenty to flirt with. At least you found out now and not after the wedding.
You better believe that after my ex and I called it off, I told everyone that not only was he a douchebag, but my mother and I lost a ton of money because he couldn't figure it out sooner, lol. It was, by far, the best decision I ever made, but I felt I was allowed to be bitter about things, lol. He hadn't put a dime into it, and 300 for the photographer was kind of a LOT for me to put down at the time. I have a feeling the OP worked hard for her part of the money put in.
Arguably the biggest bro-hater phrase of all time: "I think it's time to settle down." Settle down? Are you fucking kidding me? Why would a bro ever need to settle down? What's the fucking point? Who the fuck came up with the idea of settling down in the first place? Women. They've worked through the years to convince men that they are over the hill and that no one will want them in their old age. While this tactic may have worked on some, there is a certain group of people who have been identified by countless scholars as "the smartest people on the planet " who can spot this evil witchcraft from fucking miles away. Bros see right through this bullshit. To paraphrase Wooderson, one of the greatest bro pioneers of all time: bros get older, but slam pieces stay the same age. Bros fucking love younger chicks.
At least you know about it now and not after you got married. Hopefully that's the only thing you put a deposit down on. When my ex-fiance and I broke up, we had already put non-refundable deposits down on the church, the photographer, the receptions site, and the dress. The dress, I will use when I get married, someday. The good part there is that Ive only tried it on in the wrong color and 3 sizes too small for me. I never got to see my actual dress, so it really has no connection to my ex. With the church, my mom was able to talk to them, and they gave her a reciept saying it was a charitable donation for her taxes. We actually used the deposit on the reception site to have a joint birthday party for my brother, his wife, and my sister. The photographer was the only thing I lost money on. It was also the only thing I had put my money down on, lol. Just find a way to be creative so you don't feel like you lost the money! Also, embrace the fact that you didn't get stuck with some guy that was going to cheat on you! I actually had a big party on what would have been my wedding date and called it my, "Thank God I Didn't Get Married" party! :D
#35: It says he was making plans to go out with her. Personally, the exchanging of pictures, emails, and making plans to go out with her are, in fact, enough. Is she supposed to continue until he actually follows through? In that type of situation, in my opinion, the intent is already there. Also, to me, I'd already put that in the cheating category. Though they didn't get to the physical part before she found out, it was definitely headed that way. The emailing/exchanging photos/making plans to meet, online, is kind of like going on dates, IRL. It may not be serious, but he was still checking out other options when he is supposed to be commited to marrying the OP
It's like a personal ad where the person is saying they saw someone and that they want to get to know them better. Here's an example I found in an article: "On the N/W train Monday evening. You: Attractive, 30ish, brown hair, soft smile, standing and holding the pole. Me: Black coat and black bag. You saw me smile at you - I looked away. I wish I hadn't. Would love to talk to you - please write soon." Included in the post is an anonymous e-mail address people can reply to. Posters often seem shy, or for some unfortunate reason fail to get (or keep) contact information"
all you seem to care about is the reception cost you're actually no better than he is