By Anonymous - 27/07/2016 10:36 - Ukraine - Poltava

Today, I confessed to my boyfriend that I have no sex drive, but faked it to avoid hurting his feelings. It was after he confessed he is not attracted to women, but forced himself to have sex with me because he didn't want to admit he is gay. FML
I agree, your life sucks 25 134
You deserved it 3 608

Same thing different taste

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Whelp, looks like both of you not being honest led to something neither of you wanted.

This is why honesty is always the best policy


Well, that's one way to end a relationship.

This is why honesty is always the best policy

Whelp, looks like both of you not being honest led to something neither of you wanted.

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Redgy22 26

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I am in fact rather calm, considering that people are spewing the same train of logic that lead to conversion camps decades ago, where people were tortured and raped in an attempt to "fix" them. Excuse me for being a little annoyed with humanity repeating the same follies everytime a minority tries to get enough acknowledgment that they can't be attacked as easily by people who are annoyed that there are people different than them on our planet with nearly seven billion people.

Jesus Christ #21 I'm sure #7 is just trying to be helpful and was not be hateful at all. Maybe a little naive, but not disrespectful at all. Statistically speaking only a small percentage of people are asexual, so she may in fact be correct about OP not being attracted to her boyfriend and needing to find someone else. No need to crucify someone for trying to be helpful. Christ.

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polsen4273 8

I call BS on the whole asexual thing. It's called social anxiety. These people still ********** they're just afraid of other people.

No, asexuality is very different from social anxiety. As someone with social phobia, a step up from anxiety, I'm not asexual. I have sexual attraction to people. There's a difference between anxiety/fear and just not sexually attracted to people. You can be fine with people with no issues and still not want to have sex with people.

polsen4273 8

I'm not saying people with social anxiety are asexual. I'm saying people who claim to be asexual are just dealing very poorly and unconstructively with social anxiety.

But people are asexual WITHOUT social anxiety. And social anxiety doesn't keep you from having relationships- in which you can have sex. Asexuals can be in relationships but they are still asexual. They just don't have sexual attraction. Nothing is wrong with that.

askullnamedbilly 33

But... there are asexual people who have relationships. Ideally, with another asexual person. Being ace doesn't mean you don't want to be with people or share affection with them, you just lack the desire to rub your genitals against each other. As long as you've checked in with your physician to make sure you don't have an underlying health issue, there's nothing wrong with that. Some people have an incredibly high sex drive, some people have a low sex drive, and some don't have one at all. It's just the standard distribution in action.

I'm asexual and don't **********, so there goes that theory. Don't get me wrong, I USED to **********, so it's not a matter of not knowing what I'm missing - it never really did anything for me. I just have absolutely no interest in sex or sexual activity. I've never looked at anyone (that I know, don't know, a celebrity, a fictional person, ANYONE) and thought, "oh, I want me some of that."

#34 GhostFox Because being something as "asexual" is nothing but a poor joke and you are the same for being one of those glorious social justice warriors fighting through life with nonsense. Asexual? Come one damn there gotta be better jokes than that. It's a synonym for "attention wh**e" or friendlier - "attention seeker" just as much as this other whole shit the nowadays generation brought up, transgender and so on and so forth. I feel like my generation is the dumbest since humanity started.

Personally, I think not giving too much of a **** helps out in lots of situations. Like certain situations today. People get offended by others getting offended. Learn to shrug it off, amigo.

7, I seriously hope you didn't have sex until 3.99 years into the relationship and weren't stringing that poor guy on for 4 years.

Thank you. The way they reacted was way out of line. Plus, #7, you don't even realize that what you said about "gender assuming" in your rampage came right back out in your own words when you assumed OP was asexual. Just saying

Well that's a lot of information to become aware of all at once. I feel bad for both of you, you, feeling like you were obligated to have sex so you didn't hurt him, and him, having to hide his true self. At least you're on the same page now and can move on. However, remember this for all your future relationships, communication is key. Hiding how you feel only leads to problems.

let's remember that he also felt obligated to have sex with her so he wouldn't hurt her. never forget that men's sexual desires (or lack thereof) are just as valid and important as a woman's.

I agree, men's sexual desires are absolutely just as important as women's, and I understand what you're saying. However, in this instance, it doesn't say he felt obligated to have sex with her so he wouldn't hurt the OP. He felt obligated to have sex with her because he was gay and trying to hide who he truly was, it was so he could appear straight, there is a bit of a difference there. It is still really, and equally, sad though, him having to basically defy who he really is to hide something that isn't even wrong.

Given where you live, I can't say I blame him for being afraid to be openly gay- or you for being too worried to be openly a-libido (or asexual, if that is the case.) On the plus side, at least the two of you can be friends? Being outsiders in regards to sexuality or gender can be a hell of a bonding experience for some people.

Wait, people can reproduce asexually now? Golly Or are you talking about that fake sexuality?

awildwhisper 30

fake sexuality??!!??? please be joking. Asexuality is real and normal

Dodge4x4Ram 46

do double negative make this right. I know it works in algebra

Yes, they deserve to be born and live in a country that is highly bigoted and dangerous for people who aren't lucky enough to be heterosexual, born with sex traits that match their gender, and have a sex drive. They are SUCH bad people for being worried about being beaten to death in their homes by their family, or by strangers in the street.

Or they deserve if for not just being honest that neither one of them wanted this relationship. Please go be a SJW somewhere else?

From my understanding, Ukraine isn't fully accepting of LBGT+ people, so the truth isn't so simple to just say. Even to themselves.

This isn't just about LGBT or social acceptance of one's own sexuality. It does play a part, but the FML is illustrating a situation in which two individuals were not honest with each other (or with themselves) and it ended badly for both. I am seeing such anger and hate toward other commenters for expressing how they assessed the situation and if you're preaching equality, how is it fair to reject someone else's view on the matter? That's just my two-cents. People need to just stand together and get along. We are all different, grow up differently in different countries and cities with different backgrounds, it is OKAY to not think the same as someone else.