By whyyy - 21/11/2011 23:26 - United States

Today, I came home to find my dad's mid-life crisis has finally started. He's blacked all our windows, barricaded the door to the backyard, and set up a bunch of security cameras in and out of the house. It seems he's been reading up on Survivalist and Masonic conspiracy theory bullshit. FML
I agree, your life sucks 25 813
You deserved it 2 662

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I thought a mid-life crisis was when a person tried to recapture their youth, not just being a crazy person.

dragonstrike94 8

Hey don't joke about that "they" might hear you


He just cares about you all and want you all to be safe

Damn_Hippster 11

Hey, at least your prepared for the zombie apocalypse!

Muslimgal92 0

Yeah. When the apocalypse happens you'll be thanking him, you ungrateful B. :)

zurisbloodyrose 0

this wasn't going in the direction I thought it was..I thought he was planning on starting a rave.

n_epic_fail 14

That sounds less like "midlife crisis" and more like "I'm preparing for WW3." at least you can be reassured his ass won't be the first one down for the count...

All he needs now is a shotgun and a rocking chair.

youcunthole 0

Take a picture of your room then put it in front of the camera, mission impossible stuff right there

blackheart24 10

It would be so cool if zombies took over.

I think he has the right idea. The outside world is a scary place. You have to interact with other players, grind experience, and level professions.

Sounds like he needs some George Jones too... "I don't need your rockin' chair"

osiris39p 3

Looks like someone's been playing mw3

IvantheGrinch 5

I did that too, better be safe than sorry.

If he buys a Ford Taurus, then you'll know he's given up on all his dreams. THEN it's time to worry.

I thought a mid-life crisis was when a person tried to recapture their youth, not just being a crazy person.

SilverInGray 25

Maybe he used to be insane and mellowed out.

My dad's mid-life crisis was to: shave his head, get a tattoo, and listen to old-time rock & roll. In fact, he's been like that for over a couple months now. Not as psychotic as this guy, but still.

zurisbloodyrose 0

A mid life crisis is normally when you realize you're starting to get old and feel you haven't done enough with your life.

bossroyd 4

Is there a difference?

19, your dad sounds fucking awesome. Rock and roll ftw.

Uh, yeah, 57, he scares me a bit.

brettlovesgirls 4

My dads a lame-o and decided to get earstuds for his m-lc.

I see. Does your dad watch the walking dead by any chance?

JinxosGirl87 0

My dad decided to write and perform rap music. ::face palm::

57- I agree bro kinda. The rock part is good but rock and roll is more Elvis type and I'm into nirvana and metallica and guns n roses and those types of bands

rallets 22

bob seger?

mojobanks 8

For my midlife crisis I traded my 40 year old wife in for two 20 year olds !

113 -Teenage angst at its finest.

106 - you should make an FML. 113 - I'm more of melodic death metal/Viking metal and old school metal like you, but still, gotta appreciate some good ol' fashion rock n roll, because that's where it all started!

IvantheGrinch 5

Back in my day thats how youth was sunny.

boredblonde 17

he's smart to take those precautions, it's a lunatic's world out there!

no it isnt, its all just a conspiracy to make you think that its a lunatics world. but its really a normal world... yes i was sent by the government to trick you into thinking that this is a regular world when it is actually a lunatics world. or am i?

That wasn't even confusing. Just lame. Very lame.

You've been smoking that joint eh

oreobunbun 3

Just show him an episode of 1000 ways to die

Ull be thanking him when santas trying to break into UR house down the chimmney to eat UR cookies and drink UR milk

YOU'RE an idiot and I bet once the real grammer nazis get here YOU'LL be sorry

Spell "your", you dumbshit.

You could put the effort into capitalizing "UR" but you couldn't be bothered to add the y and o? It's two more letters, it won't take up much time I assure you.

You used "UR" even thought you knew FML would rape you for it?

oh fuck I facepalm its supposed to be your he meant not you're now my all caps you're looks derpish

51: Not until you brought it up.

No I didn't capitalize "ur" on purpose my iPod does it automatically

Is it really that big of a deal apparently everyone still knew what I ment

Yes it is. Even though we knew what you MEANT. Besides, no one wants to keep Santa out. We leave milk and cookies, he leaves presents. Fucking good deal.

Oh sorry I didn't know this was a fucking spelling test Ohhhh wait it's not!

It's not a spelling test it's SIMPLE ENGLISH. It's really NOT that hard to spell your.

If I wanted UR:) opinion i would have asked you but, until then shut up and mind "UR" own business

Btw I can spell any way I want it's not school and it's not work.. This isn't a serious site it's meant to joke around but thanks to dumb asses like you your killing this site and the hole purpose of it

you expect people on the internet to mind their business

If you want people to mind their own business and keep their "opinions" to themselves, get the fuck off this site. Edit: nice job spelling whole. You really made your point about knowing how to spell.

I couldn't edit my comment. I read yours wrong. You weren't making a point. You just really can't spell. Whoops.

his comment has been moderated due to excessive stupidity

flockz 19

can't we all just get along??? .... and exile the dumbasses to DocBastard's secret lab in the Himalayas? You know, I heard he needed victi-- ehh i mean contributors to the future of humanity.

That's really harsh on people who haven't gotten out of diapers yet.

ChronicBluntz420 7

Lol.. 21jason, ur fuked.

You spelled grammar wrong...

dragonstrike94 8

Hey don't joke about that "they" might hear you

afallingstar 22

Yeah you don't mess with free

josejimenez 0


Seriously, your dad's not paranoid... and it's not a theory

Speaking of which, why are there all these illuminati and conspiracy FMLs lately? Oh and in case you still think it's BS, look up something called Bohemian Grove.

He's prepared for the zombie apocalypse.

That is much, much worse than a typical mid-life crisis, which generally is just a new car and a haircut...

What is wrong with your father?

You never know when those darn zombies will attack you. Kudos to dad