Miscellaneous: Today, I brought my best friend home and told my dad we were...

By notgay - 21/06/2015 06:04 - United States - Cranford

Today, I brought my best friend home and told my dad we were going to study together. He loudly replied "Woah!", stumbled around for a few seconds like he was drunk, then apologized and said the "sheer amount of gayness" between us had overloaded his gaydar. We're not gay, dammit! FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 742

You deserved it 3 571

Miscellaneous

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 12/04/2013 09:24 - Australia

Today, I finally invited my girlfriend over to meet my oddball parents. The first words out of my dad's mouth were, "So, you're the silly girl who agreed to date my dickhead son." It went downhill from there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 732

You deserved it 6 929

Dad jokes, part #23556

By ashamed - 28/10/2019 02:00

Today, I finally let my parents meet a boyfriend of mine for the first time ever. My dad mentioned how he was happy to finally meet him, because for the past 4 years he'd thought I was gay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 564

You deserved it 190

Tonight, on Weird Parents…

By Anonymous - 10/08/2009 07:10 - United States

Today, my mom drove me to football practice. On the way she told me that she thought I was gay and that my friend was my lover. After 15 agonizing minutes of this, we get to my practice only to be greeted by my shirtless friend wearing a pink bandana saying, "Man, you hit me hard last night." FML

I agree, your life sucks 84 831

You deserved it 7 334

By parent - 08/03/2018 01:30

Today, I found out that my son has been telling me he's gay so we would allow the "female friend" who is actually his girlfriend to stay over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 191

You deserved it 2 810

By EchoDearEcho - 04/02/2010 14:52 - Australia

Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my parents. My mother turned to me and said, "Wait you're actually gay? I thought you were just saying that to piss off your father." I came out to her when I was 16, and have confided in her about my past relationships. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 875

You deserved it 4 761

By Karim - 12/12/2012 05:29 - France - Aix-en-provence

Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my family for the first time. My mother's immediate reaction was, "We didn't know you were gay!" No mom, she really is a girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 503

You deserved it 3 189

By Syferix - 18/03/2009 22:42 - United States

Today, I was leaving to go over to a friend's and my parents suddenly ask if I'm gay. I reply that no, I'm bisexual. My mom then asks if I've ever made out with someone of the same sex and I say yes. She turns to my dad and says 'I told you so. You owe me $20'. My parents bet on my sexuality. FML

I agree, your life sucks 110 635

You deserved it 27 052

By anonymous - 19/08/2013 05:41 - United States - Lamar

Today, I found my dad drunk, sitting on the bathroom floor crying. When I asked him why, he said, "My son is gay." I'm his only child, and I'm a girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 364

You deserved it 3 051

By thetheatreguy - 26/02/2009 14:56 - Canada

Today, I went on the best date I've been on in years. Later on, over drinks we get talking and I explain how I came out to my friends and family. When I ask him how he came out, he replies that he isn't gay, and oh, did I think this was a date? FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 660

You deserved it 12 829

By Asterisk1009 - 29/06/2009 05:41 - United States

Today, I finally got the courage to tell my parents that I'm gay. My mom said "Yeah, we know." When I asked how they knew, my dad, without looking up from the tv, said, "We've been monitoring your Internet history." FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 645

You deserved it 17 066

drewTheMan 8

Monday 22 June 2015 0:11

I guess it's pretty clear your dad never studied with anyone

karacakal2 30

Monday 22 June 2015 0:19

That's a whole new level of dad joke

Comments

i_lik_tomaters 21

Monday 22 June 2015 0:11

Wow

drewTheMan 8

Monday 22 June 2015 0:11

I guess it's pretty clear your dad never studied with anyone

daddysgirl243 21

Monday 22 June 2015 0:41

correction: never studied with another guy

octinate 17

Monday 22 June 2015 2:44

Maybe your dad thought you said you were 'going steady' not 'going to study' lol

MrConcise 34

Monday 22 June 2015 3:07

In fairness, who outside of Med or Law programs studies?

wchil 14

Monday 22 June 2015 4:41

everyone in college....and most of.high school

MrConcise 34

Monday 22 June 2015 4:49

Seriously? People don't remember things the first time they hear them?

HighasaCloud 46

Monday 22 June 2015 4:51

#51 - Ever hear of engineers?

keirookami 11

Monday 22 June 2015 5:16

Or his 'study' groups went all night

FusionPlacebo 26

Monday 22 June 2015 6:28

How can you remember everything without taking notes and looking them over? Obviously you must be some genius because I can't remember that easily and have difficulties hearing and have a better time with visuals.

MrConcise 34

Monday 22 June 2015 7:09

Well, I don't like to brag. (Wait, yes I do.) On a serious note, if you're having trouble remembering things, take a look around the room while you listen to people talk. You can create stronger memories by giving yourself a visual to associate with the words being spoken, even if it's completely unrelated to what you're trying to remember.

snipesrock 9

Monday 22 June 2015 22:15

#87 you are correct,I never studied and used photographic memory to remember things.

MrConcise 34

Monday 22 June 2015 22:31

Don't worry, I realize not everybody can be as gifted as us.

FusionPlacebo 26

Tuesday 23 June 2015 17:29

Maybe you should just stop being full of yourself and realize that not everyone is as "good"- oh ****. Why am I even trying to doll this up for you? Stop being a narcissistic asshole and get over yourself. Everyone's different.

MrConcise 34

Tuesday 23 June 2015 19:20

Jealousy is a dish best served cold. Hell, I don't even know what I'm talking about at this point. All I know is I'm great and you're telling me to not observe it.

be82tw 17

Wednesday 24 June 2015 3:45

@119, didn't anyone ever tell you not to feed the trolls?

QueenOfSuppness 25

Thursday 25 June 2015 12:10

He's not being a troll, he's being an ass

ModernaParker 5

Monday 22 June 2015 0:12

duuuude. my dad used to do stuff like that to me and my friend Alli. hahaha.

Mauskau 35

Monday 22 June 2015 1:56

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway

logicnazi 18

Monday 22 June 2015 2:21

#33, because your comment helped us thumb her story down any better

annarcheer 19

Monday 22 June 2015 3:47

#33 Has some issues.

pwnman 33

Monday 22 June 2015 4:06

33, that's the whole purpose of commenting. Commenting refers to sharing stores, providing opinions, etc.

bethanyhopkins 49

Monday 22 June 2015 0:14

That must have been a pain in the ass.

allforfun 23

Monday 22 June 2015 15:41

I lol'd

wakemeupplease 21

Monday 22 June 2015 0:15

Dads they always fail at being funny lol

whitnayfortooh 29

Monday 22 June 2015 4:53

same:/

One_Way 43

Monday 22 June 2015 9:36

Speak for yourself. My dad is hilarious.

Rinat_fml 26

Monday 22 June 2015 0:15

You and your daddy should sit down and have a talk. Tell him in all seriousness that you like girls. If he still doesn't believe you, that's his problem.

danielhartlesss 13

Monday 22 June 2015 0:24

If the dad still doesn't believe him after their chat, he should bring a female friend over to study and see how the father responds

colvindj 22

Monday 22 June 2015 0:29

I think you're completely over thinking this one. The dad is just being an asshole.

milehigh52 22

Monday 22 June 2015 0:33

#16 I thought I was the only one who understood that his dad is just trying to embarrass him.

Markovski 18

Monday 22 June 2015 3:18

Although #7 has a valid point, it's just the dad being dumb.

CommentKing207 23

Monday 22 June 2015 0:15

People say the loveliest of things when they are drunk.

CommentKing207 23

Monday 22 June 2015 0:36

Oh shoot I thought it said he WAS drunk, not acting like it. If he wasn't, explain it to him. If he was, ignore him. People say and do things from the norm when they have too much alcohol.