Today, I accidentally dropped my engagement ring down a sewer. To my surprise, the sewer water was frozen and my ring sat on top. During my efforts to retrieve it, I had to watch as the ice slowly melted due to the warm day. The ring sank further and further until it was completely gone. FML
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By
JacksonCampbell
| 9
This reminds me of that one time I tried to spice things up in the bedroom by wearing a dress for my boyfriend. It may sound completely unrelated to the FML, but it totally leads in to the whole thing. M'kay, so there I was, in full drag and with freshly-braided nipples, wearing a fake beard made out of Perdix' crotch hair, and cow's blood smeared on my lips in a cheap and yet magnificent imitation of the vintage lipstick of old. Once I'd finished sexily morris-dancing to the tune of Call on Me, I lifted my dress up sexily, anticipating an immediate ravishing, and all the glorious sounds of pealing thunder that would ensue.
So what does he do? He only calls me a freak for wearing my frilly edible teletubbies panties inside out on a fucking LUNAR ECLIPSE. I mean, what the dick, people? Here I am, trying to be sexy for my man, and I'M the bad guy? Is there no justice in this world? Wee-woo.
So what does he do? He only calls me a freak for wearing my frilly edible teletubbies panties inside out on a fucking LUNAR ECLIPSE. I mean, what the dick, people? Here I am, trying to be sexy for my man, and I'M the bad guy? Is there no justice in this world? Wee-woo.
Reply
ak7477
| 9
Yea I get how this is related to the FML..
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Mervin22
| 6
Please die
Reply
Doortje
| 29
Big fucking mistake man, you should NEVER wear your panties inside out.
I commend you though for having the guts to share this story with us. Confessing you made a beard out of perdix' crotch hair must have taken some courage. I mean, everyone will think you're a ginger now. Also, I get the feeling the dress you were wearing was made of leather, and with your figure.. no offense, but that wasn't a smart move.
If you ever want some advice how to properly turn your boyfriend on, you should send a private message to rallets. He'll help you out.
I commend you though for having the guts to share this story with us. Confessing you made a beard out of perdix' crotch hair must have taken some courage. I mean, everyone will think you're a ginger now. Also, I get the feeling the dress you were wearing was made of leather, and with your figure.. no offense, but that wasn't a smart move.
If you ever want some advice how to properly turn your boyfriend on, you should send a private message to rallets. He'll help you out.
Reply
satomi_ishida
| 0
Rofl God I love mod intervention on the retards who post stupid comments on #1. xD Always a hoot.
Reply
quite_bored
| 9
What the hell, you're 14. This is what's wrong with the world today.
Reply
LadyClarik
| 8
Oh my god...Morris Dancing *shudders* The mods rock.
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KingDingALing
| 9
You dumbass. You're ALWAYS supposed to wear POWER RANGER panties! Everyone knows that! When will people learn?!
There's no hope for you now. Your boyfriend will dump you for Perdix because he likes the way his crotch hair looks. You might as well just go jump on a table of forks with the sharp ends pointing up.
There's no hope for you now. Your boyfriend will dump you for Perdix because he likes the way his crotch hair looks. You might as well just go jump on a table of forks with the sharp ends pointing up.
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Mervin22
| 6
Calm down Sally...
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breakofdawn1
| 0
dude 14 high five ppl need to like jump off a cliff now these days
Reply
KaySL
| 24
What the fuck, #1? You are one deranged son of a bitch. A FREAK, dare I say. What the hell is wrong with you that you'd post an admission like that on FML of all places? You're a 14 year old boy, for god's sake. Well, I say "boy", and yet you really can't be considered male after that confession, can you? You sicken me for even thinking to put underwear on when there's a lunar eclipse out. Don't you know that's the surest way to bring misfortune and death upon your loved ones? Also... braided nipples? Fucking sicko.
Reply
DocBastard
| 38
Pssst...dude...where'd you get the edible teletubbies panties? Not for me, for...um, a friend...
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123zc1
| 3
God fucking damnit, Sirin. Not again!
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KingDingALing
| 9
DOC, THE EDIBLE TELETUBBIES UNDERWEAR THAT YOU ORDERED ARE HERE! Consider it a favor.
Reply
Kolden
| 11
what the hell. if I had one wish, it'd be too un-know that
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R34luver
| 5
14 and MALE!!!!! this comment made me wanna punch babies in the face :P
Reply
emodude44
| 0
....
I just licked my iphone looking for the acid that inspired this comment.
I just licked my iphone looking for the acid that inspired this comment.
Reply
obvanbob
| 0
dude everyone has qurks u probly do freaky stuff too
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LoveMySoldier82
| 0
You had me at Perdix crotch hair. Your boyfriend doesn't realize what he is missing out on.
Reply
srammer8
| 0
vancouver canada woot!!!
Reply
emjay09
| 0
kolden, much agreed. I am scarred.
Reply
fthku
| 13
I guess I'm the only one who thinks the mods went a little overboard with this?
It's just a 14 year old kid.
It's just a 14 year old kid.
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supertacowaffle
| 41
All I'm gona say is WTF???
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hessel
| 13
this has to be a troll
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Helpfulman
| 17
Its a fucking joke people, calm down.
By
wenta
| 1
so you didn't get someone to open the sewer
Reply
quite_bored
| 9
Right? There's such a thing as a manhole.
Reply
macskapingvin
| 0
I'm sure you know all about manholes.
Reply
SeaNDouble
| 1
#54 = WIN
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sammy92
| 0
hahaha this is y I love FML
By
aback
| 4
It was just taunting you.
Reply
Perksofbeingawal
| 0
If it was such a warm day, then why was it iced up? I have a feeling this fml was made up. Along with the other 82272373 fml's. Sorry to crush your dreams kids. and btw Santa isn't real... :)
Reply
vettle
| 6
because believe it or not, when the sun cones out, the day gets warmer! weird I know.
Reply
nokel11
| 7
hahahahah 111, you're fantastic.
Reply
kaprookie
| 3
121- Take another a photo this time with the camera pointing more towards your chest :)
Reply
ifinsane
| 6
That's just a bad day
By
ydi_4_suking
| 20
Haha so close but yet so far
By
cole86
| 0
HAHA
i feel no remorse for you
i feel no remorse for you
By
luller
| 0
Hi
By
Skatergirl14
| 0
ooohh I'm so sorry:~(
By
kportal69
| 5
why did you take it off?
Reply
LightningLadyy
| 0
Yeah.. How do you "accidentally" drop an engagement ring? You had to have been messing with it or had it off your hand.. Which isn't smart when you're by sewers.
By
NeatNit
| 32
Epic.
By
geminiwings87
| 0
I live in the sewers, and your ring fit my new fiancée perfectly :) thank you for your donation.
Reply
talktomandybaby
| 8
thats creepy and wierd........
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Mervin22
| 6
So you're the one who's been stealing my water?! Now give it back or else!
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macskapingvin
| 0
But I thought only alligators and rats lived in the sewers. Which one are you and how did you make the ring fit?
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yesmynameismy
| 0
lol
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Aerious
| 0
This sounds like a Futurama reference.
Reply
LoveMySoldier82
| 0
Mole people live in the sewers.
Reply
Nguyenydapooh
| 5
I love y'all trolls
So what does he do? He only calls me a freak for wearing my frilly edible teletubbies panties inside out on a fucking LUNAR ECLIPSE. I mean, what the dick, people? Here I am, trying to be sexy for my man, and I'M the bad guy? Is there no justice in this world? Wee-woo.