Today, for the sixth time in a row, I was driving my kid to school and he made me late for work. Why? He was whacking off instead of getting ready. FML
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By
marcelmg
| 10
What did he say when you called him? I'm coming?
By
goose12321
| 11
Well you know what they say, getting up (and ready for school) is the second hardest thing in the morning.
COMMENTS
By
Zoey5683
| 17
Make him walk to school or take public transportation O.o
Reply
then000bster
| 16
Yeah seriously.... Is morning wood that hard to get rid of?
Reply
gracehi
| 31
Yeah! Make that wanker walk!
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NioBerry
| 7
dude for real if he has time to wack it make him get up and walk it ( or catch the bus)
Reply
AKGirlinSD
| 20
I pretty much agree with everyone's statements in this thread. OP, to answer your user name on your FML post, it is because he's probably going thru maturity and has discovered self satisfaction is the best feeling in the world, to him, at this point in his life. You need to sit him down and tell him to wake up earlier or he's walking or taking the bus because your work puts food on the table and a roof over his and your heads.
Reply
IscoreOnU
| 19
Yeah but he can do it at night or wake up earlier... I only do it if I have time in the morning... Not gonna be late for it
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uhhSavage
| 22
Yo, 73, thanks for sharing, man.
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sonicgreg
| 12
He needs to start taking pubic transportation
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whY402Jay
| 12
But he might get arrested for doing that in public... people don't wanna see that shit.
Reply
Sonfang
| 19
#60 I think you mean puberty, not maturity.
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AKGirlinSD
| 20
^Good catch, thanks! I think people understood what I meant.
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spazz666
| 18
Honestly. I don't know why you let him get away with this 6 times without any apparent consequences.
Reply
leezylvl3
| 3
You're funny lol
By
xeka
| 10
"Kid"? Oh goodness.. Well, at least he's keeping from liver cancer :b or whatever Science said it is.
Reply
zero4life123
| 7
I think you just gave me eye cancer....
Reply
charlotte178
| 4
Prostate*
Reply
DocBastard
| 38
Uh...what? I had to read through comment #2 several times to try to decipher it, and I'm still lost. Even my Idiot-English Translation Engine is powerless here.
Reply
AKGirlinSD
| 20
Doc, I'm pretty confused too! I think the commenter was saying that by some how masturbating, he has a lesser chance of getting liver cancer of what ever the doctors have proven what masturbating can do to help not get a type of cancer or disease. Either way, I reread it multiple times and it gave me a headache.
Reply
pmadNess
| 14
So Doc, will wacking keep any kind of cancer away? What about for women?
If true, I see an increase in masturbation taking ahold of the nation. Lol
If true, I see an increase in masturbation taking ahold of the nation. Lol
Reply
zandalee
| 19
Come on guys... We all know wanking causes blindness.
By
Stalkerloo
| 11
I don't know about anybody else, but if I got caught doing that, my Dad would make me walk to school.
Reply
insertnameherr
| 11
That kid needs to know when it's the right time to do that kind of stuff.
Reply
Lrigglez
| 7
Yea i agree
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Success4444
| 12
I say whack him in the head.
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CallMeMcFeelii
| 13
I'd say most fathers would have a hard time even looking at their son right after they caught them with their dicks in their hands. Just a strange situation..
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Joe9024
| 20
I think OPs son is already on that, 82
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Success4444
| 12
The pun was intended. I didn't think I had to say it.
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iammeorami
| 25
Ya, he was really "hard"
By
NessieMonster188
| 17
Like father, like son...
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sux4u121
| 10
I don't recall op saying anything about his chronic masturbation.
Reply
OptimusVader
| 23
The son certainly has his priorities in order.
By
goose12321
| 11
Well you know what they say, getting up (and ready for school) is the second hardest thing in the morning.
Reply
RpiesSPIES
| 27
I'd say getting up is the easiest, actually...
If you know what I mean ;D
If you know what I mean ;D
Reply
Caruci
| 7
At # 5 - Lol nice picture
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goose12321
| 11
Haha cheers Caruci
By
marcelmg
| 10
What did he say when you called him? I'm coming?
Reply
KingReppin956
| 15
Lmfao
Reply
zandalee
| 19
I wake my son up every morning with, "hands off cocks and onto socks".
He's never made me late for work.
Not yet...
He's never made me late for work.
Not yet...
Reply
koranne1
| 4
ohmygosh, that's funny :D
By
KittenQuinn
| 6
Mom?!
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Dadvocate
| 5
Lmfao
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kmccain
| 27
That would work better if you're profile didn't say you are a girl...
By
PenguinBitch
| 43
He's relieving the stress from having to wake up every morning.
By
Curtar2
| 18
well it it does help you focus if you masturbate before hand.
By
Sir_ND_Pity
| 35
"I'm sorry, mom! The little bastard keeps on spitting at me so I've got to choke it and teach it a lesson!"
Make him walk, OP!
Make him walk, OP!
Reply
Sir_ND_Pity
| 35
Dad*