Yeah man as long as your doing your best and keep at it you'll figure it out eventually even if you are not parenting very well now. You'll get there bro.

#1, yea, I was gonna say... your here for a reason buddy..

#81 obviously your reason for being here isn't to show off your spelling skills.

OP is kind of foolish and arrogant to go into therapy thinking everyone else was the issue and he was perfect.

Well, no. Sometimes it's a little shocking to hear the truth, maybe he was just too focused on a different issue to see the role that he played. I don't think it's at all arrogant, but instead natural. That's why the family hired a mediator, they obviously don't agree on or can't resolve their issues alone.

You can think that you are a good parent/spouse and still acknowledge that you aren't perfect and have issues. I think I'm a good mom and wife but I know that I am far from perfect.

OP never said he was perfect, he said he was good.

We all know that the truth is that the rest of the family conspired to make him take the fall guy so that they don't look bad in front of a third party. It's so obvious (: don't worry op after the truth is revealed you can adress their problems :P Ps : kudos for actually attempting talking your problems out

Apparently he has things to work on that is family never told him about.

They might very well have told him about it, only for him to dismiss it. He's probably only realizing now because 4 people listing all their problems with you are harder to ignore than them separately bringing something up here and there.

There's no person at fault here, there are two sides to every story. That's why OP is in family therapy, to work on that.

I don't mean to be rude, but that's a bunch of bullshit. It's usually someone's fault, whether it's one person or everyone involved (the only exception is true miscommunication). While therapy shouldn't be about "its YOUR fault and you're a terrible person and blah blah blah", it's just downright stupid to encourage someone's ignorance by acting like they hold no blame- ESPECIALLY when the /entire/ family agrees that he isn't a good parent/husband. Just because OP is unaware of his wrongdoings doesn't mean he's faultless.

My ex's shithead father used to beat the crap out of her and her siblings when they were little. All three grew up blaming themselves and thinking this fucktard is a great dad. People tend to blame themselves vs others and vice versa incorrectly.

#32- But that is specifically your ex's situation. My dad was abusive towards me and my siblings and we all do place the blame on him for being a shitty parent. So just because you know someone who was in a situation of misplaced blame doesn't mean that people aren't honest about who IS to blame. Some people may be too scared to voice who they think is at fault so it seems misplaced, but they deep-down know the truth of their situation.

I never said he had no blame I said he shouldn't take ALL the blame.

You said nobody is to blame. If you had meant that everyone is to blame you should have said that everyone is at fault.

72- I meant that no one is alone to blame and that not one person caused it. Don't be a prick just move on jeeze.

#79- I do still think that could be wrong, though. Sure, it'd be nice if everyone always shared equal blame and responsibility in every problem we face, but that simply doesn't happen as often as people would like to think. In most cases, a few people share only some blame and there's one or two people who just are much worse at causing the issues. This seems like the case here, even if his family don't have golden personalities themselves.

Good point. "Tend to blame" wasn't the correct phrasing, I should've said "can blame".

Wow great idea, maybe they should go to family therapy to work things out.

For some reason this reminds me of Michael's therapist in GTA V

This reminds me of The Office... Oy

#14 - As you'd expect, I'm gonna have to charge more for a session by FML app.

Are you saying that the entire family should be able to place all the blame on one person?

That's obviously not what they mean. They mean a dysfunctional family isn't dysfunctional just because it is, there has to be a reason