By Champignon - 01/11/2013 14:17 - Belgium - Brasschaat

Spicy
Today, during dinner, my mom told my dad and me in great detail about the "awesome" new cosmetic surgery idea she just had: constructing earlobes for lobeless ears, using skin taken from women's labia. I was forced to sit through this until I finished my plate. FML
I agree, your life sucks 47 209
You deserved it 4 275

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I'd rather have lobeless ears than wear lady parts on my head.

That had to be ear-itating! No...? Okay...

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...well, Happy Halloween, I guess.

Can I ask why this is getting marked down? It was submitted during Halloweentime and... well, pretty horrifying.

Because it has nothing to do with Halloween whatsoever. When you get thumbed down, you have two choices: 1) accept it and move on, or 2) find all the people who thumbed you down and kill them. #2 can be tricky, so I'd advise you to go with #1.

Number two is much more fun and satisfying, though.

You're right Gingerette, that's why I'll dislike you.

I choose #2. I'm already halfway done.

I would have probably threw up. Your mom needs better business ideas by the way. The simplest business ideas are the ones that make millions.

I rather have my labia any day! Its more useful than my earlobes...

Yea 2 is right why take the labia which is attached and you have to wait for it to grow to take off extra. Any smart person would use the already readily available foreskin taken from circumcisions.

I'd rather have lobeless ears than wear lady parts on my head.

"Don't be such a cuntface"

You never know. If I was a burn victim or war veteran-- missing my ears, I would like the option to decide if I would be willing to have that procedure done. There are a great number of women that are having labiaplasty surgeries. I guess due to a rise in porn, some women feel they need to have that pornstar look in order to feel sexy. I think those are the women that would supply the "lobes". Waste not want not. :P

#3, wouldn't you like the feeling of permanently streaking? I guess that was a short-lived fad in the 70's, but Ray Stevens immortalized the craft.

Sigh, enslaved. Stuff I didn't want to learn

"Waste not want not" indeed, but unfortunately, the scenario of labiaplasty patients as skin graft donors might not be entirely practical (assuming the mom's idea would even work). Allogenic (meaning the donor is another person) skin grafts usually trigger an immune response from the host, thus making them highly susceptible to rejection. An autograft (skin taken from a healthy site on the patient's own body) would be a better long-term solution, but does not allow the patient to retain her intact labia AND have grafted ear lobes.

I wouldn't mind having women's labia on my head. I think...

That had to be ear-itating! No...? Okay...

You could probably hear people coming.

HA! it took me three years, but i finally got that.

Lobeless women?

Yup. Some by birth, most by accident e.g. car, fire... it's not an arm or an eye but who wants to look like a freak (involuntarily?)

Who wants to look like a freak voluntarily?

62, don't you know any teenagers?

Creativity got taken to a whole new strange level.

ViviMage 38

Hairy earlobes?! No thanks.

labia are hairless

The inner labia are, but I'm assuming she meant the outer since those are made of skin, not mucus membrane.

Well that's a whole new lobe for cosmetic surgery, and dinner conversation.

lips to lobes! awesome!

that sounds eerie