By kise - France - Paris Today, drunk at a party, I leaned through a window to throw up. I was outside. FML I agree, your life sucks 10835 You deserved it 33530 0 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Tabeling101 Today, I was in Walmart on a motorized cart and got stuck on a clothing rack next to a super hot guy. Panicking, I said "I just had surgery, I'm a new driver." After failing to get myself unstuck he had to pull the clothes rack and I apart. FML I agree, your life sucks 7467 You deserved it 1415 16 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Brandon - United States - Springfield Today, my wife cancelled on our date we had planned for over a month. It would have been our first one-on-one date since the birth of our first child. Our child is over 13 months old. FML I agree, your life sucks 13309 You deserved it 1259 59 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By julie - United States Today, I realized that if you are too lazy to get completely dressed in the morning and only put on a top, you should not answer a Skype video call from your boss that involves you standing up, turning around and grabbing files from your filing cabinet all in clear view of your web cam. FML I agree, your life sucks 9015 You deserved it 42396 90 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States - Rahway Today, I was out shopping with my mom. While we were walking, a guy in a car honked at me. I'm not used to compliments, so I was pretty flattered and flashed him a smile. He looked back at me, confused, then shook his head and pointed at my mom. FML I agree, your life sucks 46439 You deserved it 5983 72 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Lillian - 25/12/2020 01:58 - United States Are you OK, hun? Today, I walked into a store to buy a type of bread I like. The stuff was sold out, so I asked an employee when they'll be restocking it. The employee yelled at me, because, "They do have that bread," walks to the isle, and then when she saw that they really were out of the bread, she walked off. FML I agree, your life sucks 955 You deserved it 105 2 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 24/7/2020 02:00 Goldfinger Today, I found out my boyfriend doesn’t think it’s important to wipe after he poops. FML I agree, your life sucks 1709 You deserved it 168 20 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By hugadyle - 18/4/2020 14:00 Getting some action Today, I took a trip to the library's public computer section to get some important work done. After a bit of work, I went to stretch only to see that the man next to me was watching some adult films on his computer and discreetly touching himself. I still had 58 minutes of computer time. FML I agree, your life sucks 1480 You deserved it 146 5 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By pandasbear - United States Today, I went on a first date wearing a new hair color. It was Interior Latex Slate Speckled Grey, from accidentally leaning my head against a wall while house painting earlier. FML I agree, your life sucks 22791 You deserved it 14162 56 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By adam - Czech Republic Today, my dad is having his midlife crisis and bought a mercedes along with a girlfriend less than half his age. I was trying to be supportive until I found out he is funding his midlife crisis with my university loan. FML I agree, your life sucks 26150 You deserved it 1542 59 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By anon. - United Kingdom - London Today, while working at the bar, I accidentally spilled a beer on my chest. Several drunk men whistled and seemed to enjoy what they saw so much that they bought even more drinks and started coming onto me. My boss asked if I could do it again on my next shift. FML I agree, your life sucks 27237 You deserved it 2747 76 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - Canada - London Today, my coworker called me a liar when I said I've been to New York. This is the same psycho who honestly expects me to believe that she and Brad Pitt have a "thing" and that he secretly communicates with her through interviews on TV. FML I agree, your life sucks 26702 You deserved it 1781 73 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States Today, I went onto the treadmill at my gym. When it prompted me to enter my age I put 27. I'm 29 and am lying about my age to a workout machine. FML I agree, your life sucks 9713 You deserved it 38665 104 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By not chicken spaghetti - United States - Clarksville Today, while cooking supper with my boyfriend, we both smelled something funny. He tasted the sauce I was making, then asked me to taste it because something was off. I guess the burned teflon of our cheap pot mixed with Rotel just doesn't work that well. Now we're having dry chicken and plain noodles. FML I agree, your life sucks 5721 You deserved it 655 18 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By anti-peecleaner - United States Today, my boyfriend walked out of the bathroom, informed me he'd accidentally peed on the floor, and told me I could clean it up when I get a chance. FML I agree, your life sucks 33319 You deserved it 5188 198 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By thecathater - Australia - Brisbane Today, I found out that I'd been wrong to constantly accuse next door's cat of peeing on my car every night. It was actually my 16-year-old son. FML I agree, your life sucks 51720 You deserved it 7079 93 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By zzarzzur - United States - San Francisco Today, I installed motion sensor lights in my house to save on energy. When I laid down in bed, I saw the lights turn on from downstairs to the kitchen. I live alone. FML I agree, your life sucks 24665 You deserved it 1835 100 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States Today, my electricity went out. The electric company said it was because the bill was at least 4 months overdue. Apparently, I have been paying for my roommate to go out and party for weeks. FML I agree, your life sucks 36655 You deserved it 3996 63 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Spadiethestar - France Today, I discovered that my cheating, stealing ex boyfriend is posting pictures of naked women having group sex, with my face photoshopped onto them. He sent those to my boss, my friends, my family, only because I refused to bail his drunken self out of jail a couple weeks ago. FML I agree, your life sucks 73727 You deserved it 7054 280 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By embarrassed - United States - Great Neck Today, I went to a baseball game with my girlfriend's dad. I got a boner when they sang the anthem, because that's what I sing in my head when having sex with his daughter so I last longer. FML I agree, your life sucks 52500 You deserved it 20386 165 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By fmldailyyy - Ireland Today, my husband told me he had been cheating on me for the past 8 months. Twenty minutes later, he asked me what was for dinner. FML I agree, your life sucks 40891 You deserved it 3059 121 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States - Metairie Today, I was walking to school with my earphones in, when someone tapped me on the shoulder. I was shocked, and whirled around to hit him in the crotch. I soon realized he was just trying to return the commuter pass I'd dropped at the station. FML I agree, your life sucks 7556 You deserved it 34119 136 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 21/11/2020 11:02 Conspiracies claim another victim Today, after learning that "phones are tracking you" and that "Google is spying on you" from some shady website, my son destroyed all our phones and computers. FML I agree, your life sucks 853 You deserved it 160 10 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By bye loser - Canada - Abbotsford Today, I went on a first date. Everything was going well until he asked me, "So, what's the biggest thing you've stuck up your vag?" FML I agree, your life sucks 45530 You deserved it 3942 122 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By notyoueallie - United States Today, I got woken up by Hallelujah blasting outside my apartment windows for 30 minutes straight. FML I agree, your life sucks 26400 You deserved it 3806 130 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By gameguy3424 - United States Today, I went on my afternoon stroll to my local park. As I reached the park a little boy was peeing in the bushes nearby. His mother called. As I walked by, he turned, still peeing, right to me. He ended up peeing on the front of my pants and on my shoes. My house is 2 miles away from the park. FML I agree, your life sucks 44515 You deserved it 3188 60 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Greattitan2 - United States - Beaufort Today, I was working at a fast food restaurant when I cut my hand. There was a good amount of blood flowing out so I ran to my manager and asked where the first aid kit was. He then picked up a washcloth and some tape and handed it to me. FML I agree, your life sucks 25519 You deserved it 1885 68 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By NotJoeyEssex Today, I was so lonely and bored, I thought about making the most of our current heatwave by giving myself heatstroke, just so I could talk to a doctor. FML I agree, your life sucks 1066 You deserved it 1060 13 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By chubrubber - United States - Bronx Today, I participated in a walk for charity. Even though I was supposed to walk 5K, I stopped after 3K because the pain from my thighs rubbing together nearly sent me to tears. FML I agree, your life sucks 10949 You deserved it 2331 57 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States - Pleasantville Today, while blissfully unaware that it was the anniversary of the 9/11 attacks, I was making paper airplanes during my free period in school. Next thing I know, I was reported for, "making jokes about the 9/11 attacks." FML I agree, your life sucks 27381 You deserved it 8825 192 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By bloody - United States Today, my fiancé threatened to leave me for "bleeding too damn much." FML I agree, your life sucks 52028 You deserved it 5059 119 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By BrokeInLove - France Today, I was shopping for rings with my fiancée. We spent over 2 hours selecting the perfect ring and diamond to match. When filling out the paperwork I discovered I left my wallet at home. She had to pay the 20% down payment for the ring. FML I agree, your life sucks 17178 You deserved it 51917 103 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 13/6/2020 17:02 Corporate ass Today, I found out that my boss would rather give grant money back than give it to any of his employees as any sort of bonus for working through the pandemic. Two of us have worked for him for over 20 years. So much for loyalty I guess. FML I agree, your life sucks 1660 You deserved it 168 6 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By MimiFufu I am what I am Today, yet again I got delayed in airport security. One month ago, I thought it was a good idea to wear make-up when renewing my passport. It turns out I look nothing like myself without makeup. Hello shattered confidence and 5 years of needing to wear makeup for every flight. FML I agree, your life sucks 1157 You deserved it 917 6 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States Today, I was riding my bike without the seat cover on. I hit a curb wrong and the two metal rods from the skeleton of the seat went through my jeans. I went to the med clinic to then find out that I had to get stitches in my scrotum. There were no male doctors. FML I agree, your life sucks 27372 You deserved it 49634 181 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By ruinedmoment - United States Today, I was looking at an old post between my ex and I on Facebook. Everything I was reading was adorable. Just as I was reminiscing about the great relationship we had, I look to the right of the screen to see the girl he cheated on me with in "People you may know". Thanks Facebook. FML I agree, your life sucks 35421 You deserved it 8170 155 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 17/11/2020 04:56 - United States - Marietta Bye Herbie Today, after hours of waiting and $300 spent, I find out my transmission is dying. My car is old, so the price of rebuilding it is more than it's worth. That's money well spent. FML I agree, your life sucks 736 You deserved it 74 2 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By jello_bellied_snack_snapper Today, my daughter was stung by a bark scorpion, requiring a visit to the ER. Luckily, we were seen quickly. Unfortunately, due to a new policy, the medicine used to treat the sting is not available for children as it "might" cause low blood pressure. Awesome. FML I agree, your life sucks 3965 You deserved it 213 7 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - Canada Today, a crying kid was brought to my attention by a customer. He was so upset from losing his mom that he couldn't say his name or his moms name. I took him around the store asking him to point out his mom. Once we found her she told me "I was hiding from my kid to test his independence." FML I agree, your life sucks 40595 You deserved it 2792 201 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Ackno Today, I was having sex with my husband when the pores on his forehead triggered my trypophobia. We had to stop before I had a panic attack. FML I agree, your life sucks 5925 You deserved it 1694 48 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By NotAnInLawFamilyMan - United States - San Francisco Today, my mother-in-maw informed us that she sold her house and is moving in with us so we'll "take care" of her in old age. She's in perfect health. We've only been married for 4 months. My wife can't stand her for more than 2 weeks at a time, let alone living with us. FML I agree, your life sucks 35696 You deserved it 2936 110 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
Today, I found out the hard way that my sister has an OnlyFans. Not judging sex workers, I just really wish I’d know she goes by a stage name before I... I agree, your life sucks 349 You deserved it 93 3 Comments
Today, I found out my husband was cheating on me while I was waiting in an ICU waiting room while he was getting brain surgery. FML I agree, your life sucks 556 You deserved it 29 7 Comments
