Today, at work, I had to utter the phrase, "Sir, please stop rubbing yourself with the peas." It's exactly how it sounds. FML
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By
DocBastard
| 38
I hope you work at a grocery store. Otherwise this FML goes from kinky to truly bizarre.
By
ballettillidie
| 8
Please use the lotion instead.
COMMENTS
By
AlwayzCelly
| 13
It's better than having to say "Sir please stop rubbing yourself in pee"
Reply
Maxus1221
| 11
Barely.
Reply
iazy9
| 14
Does that mean he was rubbing the inside if his bladder? Ouch.
Reply
TheCanucklehead
| 22
Why not rub yourself with pee. I hear it's a healthy conditioner
By
ballettillidie
| 8
Please use the lotion instead.
Reply
Jake_Hale
| 7
Why? The peas is already itself a turn on. Better than 50 shades a grey I might say lol (oh my god I rhymed)
Reply
esines
| 9
The lotion on his peanis? Sounds like an average night for me
Reply
MichellinMan
| 20
It puts the lotion on the skins or it gets the hose again.
Reply
esines
| 9
Preeeecious!
Reply
niallo
| 23
You know, some people would pay more for Those peas.
Reply
Sfaizi24
| 17
#43. Deserves infinite downvotes
By
shaww
| 28
It sounds like he's masturbating with peas
Reply
doodieman
| 9
Sherlock is that you?
Reply
NoFlippinWai
| 24
Where is Watson? I always thought he was the mastermind.
By
DocBastard
| 38
I hope you work at a grocery store. Otherwise this FML goes from kinky to truly bizarre.
Reply
Snazzy_Snaz
| 17
Cleanup on aisle 3
Reply
DividableByZero
| 11
Or an old folks home. Crazy shit always happens there
Reply
thatgirlinoregon
| 21
It could have also potentially been in a restaurant.
"Sir, please refrain from using your genitals to stir your split pea soup."
"Sir, please refrain from using your genitals to stir your split pea soup."
Reply
Corgidan
| 12
At least she was able to maintain a *adorns tinted lenses* PEASful situation!
By
mpsteve137
| 15
I've always had such a problem trying to like vegetables. Now look at this guy! What a champ
Reply
Henge
| 6
true. I have always been told to eat my greens... never to play with my food though....
By
jrod9327
| 17
I am afraid to ask what kind of job you have lol. Hopefully an all natural lotion manufacture that uses peas? Maybe, probably not but oh god I dont know what to think.
Reply
yourmurderscenex
| 13
I guess a grocery store is out of the question?
Reply
NoFlippinWai
| 24
Resturant? Nursing Home? Home Nurse? Stripper?
By
everton99
| 16
Loving the OP's name though.
Reply
EmmaMK
| 34
Me too!
By
lickastick
| 27
I need more information because my mental picture is a tad disturbing.
Reply
Conn3ct
| 9
I don't think more details will make it less disturbing sadly.
By
cosicosei
| 22
Can i have your job? It seems so entertaining
Reply
zandalee
| 19
It's probably in the New Zealand Beehive. :)
By
EmmaMK
| 34
I Love your job!