By twatstick - 21/08/2013 17:30 - United Kingdom - Worksop

Today, at work, I had to utter the phrase, "Sir, please stop rubbing yourself with the peas." It's exactly how it sounds. FML
I agree, your life sucks 47 747
You deserved it 3 362
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DocBastard 38
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I hope you work at a grocery store. Otherwise this FML goes from kinky to truly bizarre.

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ballettillidie 8

Please use the lotion instead.

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AlwayzCelly 13

It's better than having to say "Sir please stop rubbing yourself in pee"

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iazy9 14
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Does that mean he was rubbing the inside if his bladder? Ouch.

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TheCanucklehead 22
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Why not rub yourself with pee. I hear it's a healthy conditioner

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ballettillidie 8

Please use the lotion instead.

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Jake_Hale 7

Why? The peas is already itself a turn on. Better than 50 shades a grey I might say lol (oh my god I rhymed)

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esines 9
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The lotion on his peanis? Sounds like an average night for me

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MichellinMan 20

It puts the lotion on the skins or it gets the hose again.

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esines 9
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Preeeecious!

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niallo 23
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You know, some people would pay more for Those peas.

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Sfaizi24 17
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#43. Deserves infinite downvotes

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shaww 28

It sounds like he's masturbating with peas

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doodieman 9
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Sherlock is that you?

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NoFlippinWai 24
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Where is Watson? I always thought he was the mastermind.

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DocBastard 38
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I hope you work at a grocery store. Otherwise this FML goes from kinky to truly bizarre.

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Snazzy_Snaz 17
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Cleanup on aisle 3

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DividableByZero 11
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Or an old folks home. Crazy shit always happens there

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thatgirlinoregon 21
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It could have also potentially been in a restaurant. "Sir, please refrain from using your genitals to stir your split pea soup."

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Corgidan 12

At least she was able to maintain a *adorns tinted lenses* PEASful situation!

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mpsteve137 15
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I've always had such a problem trying to like vegetables. Now look at this guy! What a champ

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Henge 6
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true. I have always been told to eat my greens... never to play with my food though....

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jrod9327 17
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I am afraid to ask what kind of job you have lol. Hopefully an all natural lotion manufacture that uses peas? Maybe, probably not but oh god I dont know what to think.

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yourmurderscenex 13

I guess a grocery store is out of the question?

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NoFlippinWai 24
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Resturant? Nursing Home? Home Nurse? Stripper?

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everton99 16

Loving the OP's name though.

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EmmaMK 35
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Me too!

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lickastick 27
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I need more information because my mental picture is a tad disturbing.

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Conn3ct 9
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I don't think more details will make it less disturbing sadly.

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cosicosei 22
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Can i have your job? It seems so entertaining

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zandalee 19
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It's probably in the New Zealand Beehive. :)

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EmmaMK 35
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I Love your job!

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