Miscellaneous: Today at work I had recieved a lot of phone calls. I thought...

By Idk - United States - Wilton

Today at work I had recieved a lot of phone calls. I thought maybe it was a scammer line because I never recieve calls. Turns out my phone number was a character's same number in a TV Show. FML

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2575

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Miscellaneous

Understandable

Walk on the wild side

Dementia or hate? You decide

By theynamedmeluke - United States - Austin

Today, I found out I was adopted when my drunk dad made a terrible Star Wars joke. FML

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44232

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2848

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By patate

Today, I was yelled at and almost fired for showing up "late" to work. I was the first one here. FML

I agree, your life sucks

4715

You deserved it

317

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By Anonymous

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me for not letting her keep the 75 cents that she stole from my truck. FML

I agree, your life sucks

23148

You deserved it

50824

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By Azcrazy - United States

Today, I quit my job after two years. Now I have my crazy boss sitting out in front of my house, telling me she wants to work things out. She's been there all day. FML

I agree, your life sucks

50396

You deserved it

3992

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By mrjude

Whiner!

Today, my boss yelled at me, telling me that I can't answer the phone anymore. Not because I do a bad job, but because a co-worker whined about it being her job. People call her and complain about how rude she is and then ask to talk to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1661

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By good friend - United States - Missoula

Today, my friends and I had our Christmas party. I ended up being the only one sober, and had to drive each and every person home. There were 15 of us. FML

I agree, your life sucks

40423

You deserved it

5796

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By sheyshey0413 - United States

Today, I realized that my boyfriend will only have sex with me if I am on my stomach and not revealing my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks

46888

You deserved it

6916

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By nofriends - United States - Boise

Today, my boyfriend admitted that he wanted to throw me a surprise birthday party. The only issue was the fact I didn't have any friends to make it happen. FML

I agree, your life sucks

20997

You deserved it

1942

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By dk_2k16 - United States - Hattiesburg

Check that expiration date man, it's later than you think

Today, I went to take my permit test. I had been studying for months and was familiar with the whole book. When I sat down to take my test, I didn't recognize any of the questions. I went home and found out the book I used to study was the book my mom used to take her test in 1970. FML

I agree, your life sucks

15510

You deserved it

18743

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By Anonymous - United States

Today, I was driving along, and went to spit out my window. My window was up. This happened in heavy traffic. People saw. FML

I agree, your life sucks

20051

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51748

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By 3LLI0TT - United States

Today, I poured my heart out into what had to be my greatest set of lyrics for my band ever, at the same time my teacher was explaining chemical changes to the class. At the end of the lecture he picked up my paper, and set it on fire to demonstrate a chemical change. FML

I agree, your life sucks

40207

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33740

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By Skido - United States

Today, I was watching a documentary on The World's Fattest Man. Half way through the show the reported started talking about his girlfriend. The Fattest Man in the world has a girlfriend. I'm 21 an have never had a girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks

57399

You deserved it

9003

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By Heartbroken - Australia

Today, I have to be at work with a smile on my face, whilst sitting next to the asshole that dumped me last week. FML

I agree, your life sucks

25251

You deserved it

5593

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By lice - United States

Today, after having sex with my boyfriend I went into his shower to freshen up. Where I saw an open bottle of pubic lice shampoo. FML

I agree, your life sucks

125146

You deserved it

13961

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By Anonymous - Australia - Melbourne

Today, at my mother's open-casket funeral, my sister-in-law went to pay her respects. As she stood in front of the body, she coughed, muttering "bitch" in the process. Either nobody else noticed or nobody cared, and she went on her way, noticeably not choked up at all. FML

I agree, your life sucks

45289

You deserved it

4342

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By Sadtimes - United Kingdom

Today, my sister broke up with her boyfriend of 4 years because he hadn't "popped" the question. I've just spent the last 2 months helping him plan the perfect proposal. FML

I agree, your life sucks

51718

You deserved it

3711

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By Bellend - United Kingdom

Today, I noticed a flash car badly parking itself in a handicapped space. I hate the asshats who do this, so I went up to berate the driver. After an opening salvo of coarse language, a glint of light on his wheelchair in the back caught my eye. I then had to apologise for being a shitehawk. FML

I agree, your life sucks

6601

You deserved it

42463

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By Not Supportive

Today, it was my boyfriend's grandfather's funeral and visitation. These things make me nervous so I, not thinking, made comments that included the words killing, dying and death. I'm a rubbish support system. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1413

You deserved it

537

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By Anonymous - United States - Newtown

Today, I was at my friend's Bar Mitzvah. After he finished his long-winded speech, I sarcastically did the mockingjay sign from the Hunger Games. It took a couple of seconds before I realized how that looked, and a couple more for me to be shouted down and kicked out. FML

I agree, your life sucks

18575

You deserved it

34779

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By username - United States

Today, I was feeling a little naughty, so I put on a sexy outfit, laid down on the hood of my boyfriend's car, and waited for him to find me. When he came into the garage and saw me, he freaked out and bitched at me, because I "could have dented the chassis". FML

I agree, your life sucks

38445

You deserved it

16450

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By asuramaru

Knowledge is power

Today, at 19 years-old, I found out that kiwi birds aren’t actually extinct. FML

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538

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1172

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By crinitis - Canada - Ancaster

Today, I found out my parents only had me in an attempt to fix their relationship. It didn't work. FML

I agree, your life sucks

22976

You deserved it

1380

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By anon - United States

Today, I found out that the weird lump on my eye is benign. That would be great news but they aren't going to treat it at all. Now I look like I'm high all the time. FML

I agree, your life sucks

28542

You deserved it

2893

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By fatass - United States

Today, I had a great workout and was feeling really good about my body. Until I sat on my desk, and broke it. FML

I agree, your life sucks

39868

You deserved it

7495

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By inpain - United States

Today, I thought it would be funny to touch my girlfriend's back with my cold hands. She thought it would be funny to crush my left testicle with her knee as I was trying to fall asleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks

15248

You deserved it

40513

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By SoGoodAtLife - Canada - Toronto

Today, I gave my boss a ride home from work. I had my phone on hands-free mode, so all calls would come through on speaker. I got a call from the new job I was applying at, with my boss listening to each word. FML

I agree, your life sucks

19256

You deserved it

6583

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By Anonymous - United States - Los Angeles

Today, I had to choke back tears as my cockslap of a brother brutally mocked me for being a 25-year-old loser who's never been kissed by a girl, while at 14 he's already lost his virginity. FML

I agree, your life sucks

31069

You deserved it

4630

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By Anonymous - United States - Natrona Heights

Today, I felt manly. I spent almost the entire day peeling paint, power sanding, and applying Spackle for my grandma. Strutting with masculinity, I headed for the shower, only to let out a womanly yelp at a spider hanging at eye level around a corner. Manliness gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks

13870

You deserved it

23649

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By dr mamour - France - Paris

Today, during my first day as a medical intern in a new ward, I was performing a rectal exam. My supervisor thought it would be funny to burst into the room and scream, "Who are you?! You don't even work here, you pervert!" FML

I agree, your life sucks

53933

You deserved it

4064

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By caughtorangehanded - United States

Today, I found out my older brother put tanning lotion in the lotion I use to masturbate with. Now I have orange palms and an orange penis which won't go away for weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks

20807

You deserved it

46160

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By Anonymous - Australia - Albert Park

Today, I was stumbling down the street due to arthritic pain, when I accidentally bumped into a man. He turned and yelled, "Watch it, you clumsy, ugly bitch", to which I apologised and told him about my arthritis. He stared at me in confusion, then said, "Well, you're still ugly", and walked off. FML

I agree, your life sucks

56659

You deserved it

3918

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By Anonymous - United States - Mckinney

Today, my 5-year-old daughter said "Mommy, why doesn't anyone wanna marry you?" I've been asking myself the same question for all too many years. FML

I agree, your life sucks

20845

You deserved it

1949

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By RomanceFail - United States - Crestwood

Today, I woke up my girlfriend up with a cute kiss. She was apparently having a bad dream and headbutted me. FML

I agree, your life sucks

29968

You deserved it

3357

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By lachaisse - United States - Vinton

Today, my sisters and I pitched together nearly $500 to send my mom to the spa for Mother's Day. We put the printed sheet with her info into a little box with our card on top. When she opened it, she freaked out and started hugging my dad. Turns out he switched the cards and took all the credit. FML

I agree, your life sucks

63064

You deserved it

4111

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By ponyboy - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she suspected me of cheating. She thought I was cheating because she caught me sneaking out in the middle of the night. I was sneaking out to plan my proposal to her. FML

I agree, your life sucks

41234

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4166

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By driving me crazy

Zzzzzzzzz

Today, I had to temporarily relocate to my brother's room after mine was being repainted. Not only do I have to sleep on the floor, but I also have to put up with my brother and dog both snoring loudly. What's worse is that they alternate in snoring. Goodbye sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks

3770

You deserved it

394

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By Anonymous - Canada

Today, I wrote to the guy whom I am in love with how I feel about him. He was very calm and told me to give him some time to think it over. Later in the day, I found out he blocked my number and rejected me on facebook. But, the worse part is he then texted me saying "This is my reply". FML

I agree, your life sucks

37079

You deserved it

5012

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By Anonymous - United Kingdom - London

Today, I realised that I've been working in an all-male environment for too long when my supervisor walked into the canteen visibly scratching his balls, and this seemed like a completely normal occurrence. FML

I agree, your life sucks

23262

You deserved it

2876

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By Anonymous - 14/2/2021 00:30

Backstabbing

Today, I was chilling with my best friend and suddenly I got a text from my ex saying he wanted me back. My best friend saw the text and said, "Don't go back with him, you deserve better." I wanted to go back with him but I didn't. Later, I saw them hanging out and turns out they're dating. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1136

You deserved it

107

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By Purple-jacket

Today, I graduated with a CS degree and a certification in networking, only to make $12/hr. Guess some trade jobs are worthless now. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1785

You deserved it

312

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Top comments

By RichardPencil | 30

#7736815 - Wednesday 12 December 2018 15:42

867-5309!!!

By Lil Mouse Isa | 27

#7733858 - Thursday 6 December 2018 16:51

Time to get in contact with some people and let them know they used a real person's phone number.

COMMENTS

By Lil Mouse Isa | 27

#7733858 - Thursday 6 December 2018 16:51

Time to get in contact with some people and let them know they used a real person's phone number.

By interesting33 | 36

#7734738 - Saturday 8 December 2018 12:47

I always wondered if they used fake numbers for that

Ishvah | 15

#7736787 - Wednesday 12 December 2018 14:32

Usually they do. 555-0100 to 555-0199 are reserved for fiction.

RichardPencil | 30

#7736818 - Wednesday 12 December 2018 15:44

Yes. You’ll notice a lot of TV show phone numbers are 555-xxxx. There is no 555 exchange.

By BurnInDemonFire | 30

#7734814 - Saturday 8 December 2018 18:02

And that's the end of that chapter.

By RichardPencil | 30

#7736815 - Wednesday 12 December 2018 15:42

867-5309!!!

Glowworm56 | 25

#7736859 - Wednesday 12 December 2018 17:22

Damn you, Tommy Tutone!

raven_of_azarath | 33

#7737050 - Thursday 13 December 2018 3:58

My mom told me that when that song came out, a girl named Jenny actually had that number.

By Xavyeah | 74

#7736827 - Wednesday 12 December 2018 16:01

"i before e, except after c"...
Even I, a French man, knows this.
You've got to listen to the Jackson 5 a bit more, dude.

EmikoShiriyuki | 26

#7736995 - Wednesday 12 December 2018 23:30

There's more words that don't follow that rule than actually do. 923 words break the rule, only 44 follow it.

By alien236 | 8

#7736852 - Wednesday 12 December 2018 17:09

Why are Earthlings so stupid? What do they think is going to happen when they call this number other than making its owner's life miserable? Sheesh.

weaboo | 12

#7736974 - Wednesday 12 December 2018 22:38

Usually they don’t have an owner people just check because sometimes they actually get a hotline for calls like these for some reason

By IHateMyLife4566585765866 | 4

#7736940 - Wednesday 12 December 2018 20:50

just change your Number and you're good

By chosha_fml | 25

#7737011 - Thursday 13 December 2018 0:45

How old is the show? Because shows can’t do that nowadays. That’s why TV and movie phone number start with 555.

By thefmlman2011 | 35

#7737012 - Thursday 13 December 2018 0:50

At least your popular?

By ciph3r | 9

#7737344 - Thursday 13 December 2018 20:05

Jenny?? Is that you??