By RIPcareer - United States - Ellicott City Today, after submitting my college application, I noticed that I mistyped "math enthusiast" as "meth enthusiast". FML I agree, your life sucks 25954 You deserved it 7904 97 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By unemployed - United States Today, my boss came storming towards me, screaming just how tired she is with my constant bullshit. Already pissed off, I retorted that she's a bitch and should go lose some pounds. Turns out she was talking to her husband on her bluetooth headset. FML I agree, your life sucks 22725 You deserved it 77553 148 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By BigLove - United States - Stoneham Today, Facebook put something out that shows a video of your entire life on the website. A part of it showed your most popular status update. Mine was from when I got dumped at Christmas. FML I agree, your life sucks 52384 You deserved it 5282 79 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By ThatWasntFun - United States - Jacksonville Today, I went to have a pre-cancerous mole removed off of my nose. When the doctor numbed my nose, she didn't check to see if the anesthetic actually worked, and began hacking away at my nose, leaving me to feel every last flick of the razor. Turns out I have an immunity to that anesthetic. FML I agree, your life sucks 31387 You deserved it 2420 67 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By yoked - United States Today, while lying in bed with my wife, I asked her if she still loved me. Her reply "Sometimes". This I know is true because she instantly rolled over and farted on my leg. FML I agree, your life sucks 33090 You deserved it 4607 84 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By jackjona - United States - Sioux Falls Today, I closed the store on my own for the first time. As I was locking the front door, the key broke. Now half the key is stuck and the door is still unlocked. I have to stay until we open in the morning and I'm not getting paid for it. FML I agree, your life sucks 8897 You deserved it 1042 47 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By I don't know, son - Canada - Toronto Today, I was lying beside my 5-year-old son to help him get to sleep. He turned his head and asked, "Daddy, why do you suck so much?" FML I agree, your life sucks 49731 You deserved it 4760 109 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By grossed out - Australia - Melbourne Today, whilst in a dressing room trying on some new clothes, I experienced the sheer terror of having someone fling a pair of dirty panties over the stall wall only to make off with some stolen ones, whilst you're still standing there in shock staring at another woman's dirty underwear. FML I agree, your life sucks 13950 You deserved it 1213 57 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By jannister - Germany - Bad Blankenburg Today, my mom threw my tampons in the garbage and said that from now on, I'll be buying pads instead. Turns out she read a scare story going around by email that all the local teens are soaking their tampons in alcohol and inserting them anally to secretly get drunk. FML I agree, your life sucks 33798 You deserved it 2138 280 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By greatdriver...4 - United States Today, I tried to back out of a spot in a parking garage. I did a 12 point turn, hit the car behind me and still didn't manage to get out of the spot. Everyone was staring at me, and the attendant had to come over and move my car for me. I have to park there every day. FML I agree, your life sucks 11822 You deserved it 26615 70 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous Today, I was staying at my friend's house, which is next door. Our houses are the same layout, only mirrored, so tonight when I got out of bed in the dark I instinctively turned to my left, thinking I was entering the bathroom, and fell down the stairs. Three of my teeth are missing. FML I agree, your life sucks 3327 You deserved it 401 3 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Nalya - France Today, my boss told me that we are having a big meeting tomorrow, with lots of important people. Before leaving the room he added "Please, tomorrow, try to dress better." FML I agree, your life sucks 20784 You deserved it 6384 16 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 6/7/2020 08:02 Hold the line Today, I discovered that my work's new phone system automatically takes people off hold the very second you pick up the phone. I discovered this after picking up the phone and complaining to my workmates about the annoying customer I had on the line for a full minute, all while he listened. FML I agree, your life sucks 483 You deserved it 2289 4 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Ugh Today, I had my last assessment for my university degree in the form of an interview at 11am. Without doing this interview, I can't graduate. The interviewer was a no show. FML I agree, your life sucks 4290 You deserved it 194 6 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States Today, I was kicked in the crotch. The girl who did it thought I was her ex-boyfriend. I'm a girl. FML I agree, your life sucks 37275 You deserved it 4417 205 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By TatooFAIL - United States Today, I found out that the phrase I got tattooed on my lower back is misspelled. FML I agree, your life sucks 16245 You deserved it 67651 165 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By wmkaz - Canada - Sault Sainte Marie Today, I am six months pregnant and have been lactating. When I noticed this and pointed it out to my husband, I jokingly stated that I felt like a cow. He then replied. "Oh, you're not a cow. At most you're just a fat pig." He still has no clue why I'm upset. FML I agree, your life sucks 30042 You deserved it 4999 177 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 1/11/2020 11:01 - Slovakia - Senec Whackjobs 'R Us Today, I realised that 3/4 of my family are prone to believe conspiracies and are anti-Covid freaks. I want to keep our relationships, but every discussion ends in an argument about some conspiracy they believe. FML I agree, your life sucks 989 You deserved it 140 4 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous Today, I tripped over a kid at work. She was sitting on the floor with her legs sticking out into the walkway. Her mom caused a scene, accusing me of doing it on purpose. FML I agree, your life sucks 1713 You deserved it 90 1 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States Today, I found a surveillance camera in my room. FML I agree, your life sucks 53154 You deserved it 4085 146 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By ;_; - Canada - Burlington Today, I saw a guy in the street drawing caricatures, and I decided to pay him to do one of me. Being a caricature, I looked pretty monstrous in it. When I showed it to my mum later, she shuddered and said, "Yeah, looks just like you." FML I agree, your life sucks 37811 You deserved it 4322 46 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By hannah Today, I discovered that every time my period ends, I queef loudly and uncontrollably. I’m literally too embarrassed to see a doctor about this. FML I agree, your life sucks 1647 You deserved it 240 12 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States Today, my boyfriend and I were in bed and I asked him why he was with me. His answer was, "Well, the last girl I dated was really smart and she always made me feel dumb, so I decided to switch things up a bit. You make me feel like a genius babe." FML I agree, your life sucks 43040 You deserved it 7952 86 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By crazy_mom - United States Today, a girl I like came over to my house because I'd promised to help her prepare for a math test. My mom thought it would be funny to put a stack of porn magazines and handcuffs on the table in my room when I went to open the door. FML I agree, your life sucks 38495 You deserved it 4326 170 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States Today, my brother got his very first paycheck and blew it all on weed and a godawful tattoo, whereas I have been saving steadily for three years. Yet according to mum and dad, I'm the one who is irresponsible with money, because if I was being responsible I'd have enough for my own house by now. FML I agree, your life sucks 25315 You deserved it 1627 80 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By lxygrl - United States - Phenix City Today, I was told I have kidney stones, kidney infections, and a bladder infection and that I have to get admitted into the hospital. I let my boss know, and she replied, "But you're still coming in for your shift tonight, right?" FML I agree, your life sucks 2161 You deserved it 106 13 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By thedeadone Today, I found the phone number of my biological mother after years of searching for her, and gave her a call. I introduced myself by name and said, "I'm your daughter." There was a pause at the other end, followed by, "The one I aborted or the one I gave away?" FML I agree, your life sucks 2273 You deserved it 187 21 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - Canada Today, I told my husband I was pregnant. He laughed and said, “April Fools, right?” then left the room, still laughing like it was the dumbest thing ever. Tomorrow's April Fools day. I really am pregnant. FML I agree, your life sucks 72449 You deserved it 4266 82 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By piliseep Today, I had to sit outside with nothing but a large bottle of wine to keep me company and no way to block out the sounds of my cousins loudly having sex with my two roommates upstairs. FML I agree, your life sucks 3981 You deserved it 355 14 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By dk_2k16 - United States - Hattiesburg Today, I went to take my permit test. I had been studying for months and was familiar with the whole book. When I sat down to take my test, I didn't recognize any of the questions. I went home and found out the book I used to study was the book my mom used to take her test in 1970. FML I agree, your life sucks 15474 You deserved it 18641 72 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By UnknownKitten - United States - Elgin Today, I returned home after a long day of work. I noticed that my kitten had gotten a hold of my pin cushion, and that there were no needles left in it. My husband and I have only managed to find one, out of 16. FML I agree, your life sucks 13134 You deserved it 2013 61 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By ChangoFett - United States - Laguna Hills Today, I changed my teacher's PowerPoint picture to me making a funny face. He saw it and changed it to a picture of him, with a middle finger. FML I agree, your life sucks 20136 You deserved it 50732 66 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States Today, my school put on a musical. I was one of the leads, and in the middle of my solo, I got a huge nosebleed. A little girl in the front row screamed. FML I agree, your life sucks 33740 You deserved it 2721 53 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By momoffour - United States Today, I found out that my husband's secretary named her new baby boy after my husband. Everyone at the office thinks it's funny. My husband says it's a coincidence. FML I agree, your life sucks 34623 You deserved it 3276 119 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - France Today, I received a text message from my wife who had gone out for the evening with some girlfriends: "Have to take a friend home, she's drunk! I'll be staying at his place. Call you tomorrow morning." His? FML I agree, your life sucks 50540 You deserved it 4478 259 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By PokeTheBear - Canada Today, my coworkers decided to play a game of "Who Can Piss the Boss Off the Most". I opted not to play, but I still won. FML I agree, your life sucks 50514 You deserved it 5699 72 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Kyra.45 - United States - Troy Today, I was so sexually frustrated that I tried getting off with a banana. It was not enjoyable, for me or the banana. FML I agree, your life sucks 39063 You deserved it 32327 181 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By blegh - Switzerland Today, I reached for my beer and took a huge swallow before I realized that I had picked up my friend's tobacco spit cup. "Vomit" is not a strong enough word to describe what happened next. FML I agree, your life sucks 27746 You deserved it 6212 58 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By x - Canada Today, I spent 65 dollars in cab fare and skipped half of my grade 12 classes, including a unit test, to see my girlfriend on our two year anniversary. I arrived just in time to see her kiss her other boyfriend of over a year good bye. FML I agree, your life sucks 44612 You deserved it 9320 94 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By vey - China - Beijing Today, and for the third time this week, I found a pubic hair in my soup. I'm currently bed-ridden and can't afford to piss off my boyfriend by complaining. FML I agree, your life sucks 43660 You deserved it 5218 109 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - Australia Today, I got detention from my teacher for not handing an assignment in. It would be understandable if I hadn't handed it in a week before it was due. She won't listen to reason. FML I agree, your life sucks 25254 You deserved it 1831 60 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By keiNan_fml | 35 #6439097 - Monday 19 October 2015 11:47 are you the one who "accidentally" typed incest also. Send a private message 274 0 Reply
By StickyPickles | 33 #6439070 - Monday 19 October 2015 11:11 Proof read my friend Send a private message 225 6 Reply
By Miss_Chevious | 37 #6439065 - Monday 19 October 2015 11:06 Certainly not an English enthusiast Send a private message 171 12 Reply
Reply pooldude | 24 #6439080 - Monday 19 October 2015 11:31 it was a typo... But he should have proof read the essay... Send a private message 9 26 Reply
Reply WD_Stevens | 22 #6439135 - Monday 19 October 2015 13:27 I was hoping this would be the first comment. Hats off to you, sir. Send a private message 5 11 Reply
Reply Mpii | 11 #6439160 - Monday 19 October 2015 14:16 Proof reading the essay is what an english enthusiast would have done. Send a private message 27 1 Reply
Reply Girlshotdown1 | 21 #6439863 - Tuesday 20 October 2015 10:07 I agree #9 Revise and Edit Send a private message 0 1 Reply
By chaseafterwind82 | 29 #6439066 - Monday 19 October 2015 11:07 Hmmm, probably not the type of 'extra-curricular extra' they wanted to see... Send a private message 58 4 Reply
Reply beeferjay | 34 #6439273 - Monday 19 October 2015 17:53 meth; go big or go home Send a private message 13 1 Reply
By StickyPickles | 33 #6439070 - Monday 19 October 2015 11:11 Proof read my friend Send a private message 225 6 Reply
Reply Replyka | 17 #6439134 - Monday 19 October 2015 13:25 Before submitting preferably Send a private message 17 3 Reply
Reply Radgears47 | 23 #6439277 - Monday 19 October 2015 17:59 Proof... As in math... I like puns Send a private message 2 14 Reply
Reply LMAO__no | 15 #6439802 - Tuesday 20 October 2015 6:18 it would be better to get someone else to proof read. otherwise you might read it the way you want instead of the way it says. Send a private message 2 1 Reply
By Cads1 | 24 #6439071 - Monday 19 October 2015 11:12 School of hard knocks for you it is. Send a private message 23 4 Reply
By False_Stupidity | 41 #6439073 - Monday 19 October 2015 11:16 The best meth-od is to proof read and then get someone else to proof read too before sending anything important as its sometimes hard to see your own mistakes. Send a private message 48 3 Reply
Reply Naith | 14 #6439139 - Monday 19 October 2015 13:30 Especially when up are on meth. Send a private message 26 0 Reply
By cleydc | 9 #6439074 - Monday 19 October 2015 11:17 Maybe they have a major for that? Haha just kidding FYL OP Send a private message 7 11 Reply
By xn3x | 10 #6439076 - Monday 19 October 2015 11:20 You may be using a pseudonym, but I will always remember your name, Mr. Haizenberg. Send a private message 17 5 Reply
By Arot6 | 17 #6439079 - Monday 19 October 2015 11:27 You should be fine if you're applying for their chemistry program Send a private message 55 2 Reply
By alexis83188 | 24 #6439082 - Monday 19 October 2015 11:34 Meth: more than once Send a private message 15 2 Reply
By venomousflower | 24 #6439084 - Monday 19 October 2015 11:35 Well shit Send a private message 10 2 Reply
Today, I caught up with a good friend and he let me rant about my sexless marriage. He was really understanding and supportive. I got home and he sent... I agree, your life sucks 587 You deserved it 123 3 Comments
Today, I had the house to myself for the morning. I decided to enjoy being alone, so pulled my trusty bullet vibrator from the drawer. I was very much... I agree, your life sucks 829 You deserved it 174 8 Comments