FML : Today, after an hour of crying over a guy I like, I put on some Adele and sang along. My mom quickly took notice and came to give me advice, which was...

Today, after an hour of crying over a guy I like, I put on some Adele and sang along. My mom quickly took notice and came to give me advice, which was to "get over it" because he doesn't want me, and that "masturbation beats relationships hands down." Gee, thanks mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks

You deserved it

By Anonymous - / Sunday 20 January 2013 18:22 / New Zealand - Hamilton

Love

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Top comments

By strawberrywine22 | 27

#5332571 - Monday 21 January 2013 2:02

If singing along to Adele is your way of grieving over your lost relationship, I'm with your mother. Maybe you should stick to boyfriends that require AA batteries.

By ballbearing | 10

#5332560 - Monday 21 January 2013 2:00

Your mom is right.

Comments

By Starcatch77 | 20

#5332557 - Monday 21 January 2013 1:59

Great Mom.

By ballbearing | 10

#5332560 - Monday 21 January 2013 2:00

Your mom is right.

By strawberrywine22 | 27

#5332571 - Monday 21 January 2013 2:02

If singing along to Adele is your way of grieving over your lost relationship, I'm with your mother. Maybe you should stick to boyfriends that require AA batteries.

skoob1 | 12

#5332846 - Monday 21 January 2013 5:19

Yes, because an alcoholic anonymous meeting is definitely a great place to find a keeper. At least they're trying!

spaboolly | 26

#5332853 - Monday 21 January 2013 5:24

49- If your attempts at jokes leave people thinking "What the hell is this guy talking about?" then you should probably work on your humor.

sens3sfailing | 24

#5332869 - Monday 21 January 2013 5:43

I think most people will understand the joke, being that it isnt very clever at all. it just sucks.

Quidikic | 9

#5332913 - Monday 21 January 2013 6:40

Yes, quite. Your creativity with said initialism is oh so clever.

By ScaryyMary | 14

#5332575 - Monday 21 January 2013 2:03

Your mom is ridiculous. Vibrators can't buy you presents or dinner.

ElatedEarthling | 15

#5332623 - Monday 21 January 2013 2:20

But boyfriends can't vibrate...

ScaryyMary | 14

#5332629 - Monday 21 January 2013 2:24

Solution: date a robot.

ElatedEarthling | 15

#5332636 - Monday 21 January 2013 2:26

Or someone with sex-induced epilepsy.

LilRob58 | 5

#5332873 - Monday 21 January 2013 5:45

Some of us can vibrate.....

Quidikic | 9

#5332915 - Monday 21 January 2013 6:42

53- Yeah, what if we would spend an hour in a freezer before sex?

Hint hint, ladies.

zandalee | 19

#5332950 - Monday 21 January 2013 7:32

...depends on how frozen solid the member is.

By Kal3Y | 12

#5332577 - Monday 21 January 2013 2:03

Maybe she was trying to help with some tough love? Either way, sorry OP:(

By tomhofer | 14

#5332579 - Monday 21 January 2013 2:04

We could of had it alllllllllll rolling in the deeeeeeeeeeppppp

ScaryyMary | 14

#5332591 - Monday 21 January 2013 2:06

I always wondered what that song meant...

By sarbear293 | 4

#5332583 - Monday 21 January 2013 2:04

Well, maybe she's right

By Coop817 | 19

#5332586 - Monday 21 January 2013 2:05

Nothing beats advise from the wise

Coop817 | 19

#5332805 - Monday 21 January 2013 4:43

*Advice
Wow

By theycallmekitty | 13

#5332593 - Monday 21 January 2013 2:07

Tell her you can't use your mouth on yourself.

Ohitsariel | 25

#6541556 - Sunday 21 February 2016 5:37

That's probably not something you should say to your mother....

By zandalee | 19

#5332595 - Monday 21 January 2013 2:08

Sounds like a pretty cool Mum to me.
Vibrators don't argue, never leave the loo seat up, never hog the remote, can be extremely flexible, ;) and never tell you your bum looks big. Get one!

ScaryyMary | 14

#5332605 - Monday 21 January 2013 2:11

Yeah, but you try to take one into a movie theatre with you and all of a sudden you're a pervert.

redbluegreen | 40

#5332635 - Monday 21 January 2013 2:26

Maybe we're going to the wrong theaters, Mary.

ScaryyMary | 14

#5332641 - Monday 21 January 2013 2:27

Pee Wee Herman WAS my childhood hero, after all...

zandalee | 19

#5332956 - Monday 21 January 2013 7:36

...Hey I just discovered another way to use a vibrator! Turn it on, put it between the mattress and the base - instant vibrating bed! Very soothing. Of course it does help to have a vibrator with industrial strength and durability...