I would make an Angry Birds joke here, but that's too tired. Set up a pigsty or something.

OP should climb out the window and not participate in the blatant Apple propaganda going on

Funny how people make fun of them. Revenge of poultry!

The most pragmatic approach that can be salvaged from all this lunacy is to buy an air horn. Good luck, OP.

That was my first thought too 69. Get an air horn then go outside, stick your arm around the corner while using it full blast, then run!!!

Geese rule here in this neighborhood!!!!

This reminds me of that old film "The Birds" RIP OP

How fowl.

And I heard a song in my head say it don't matter when it's always a good time.

This is a good time?

just throw rice on the ground and then watch them explode

This is just as much an urban legend as Bigfoot, the Loch Ness Monster, and perdix being married.

Perdix got owned. Ouch.

Oh, here we go.

Hmm, they might make better guard dogs than actual dogs. HEY MITZY! You've been replaced!

Jump out your window and wing it...

Just give those geese a camera. They'll be too busy flooding my FB with "duck face" pics....

If they were ducks or teenage girls, yes. But they're geese.

They both have bills....

You could win $10,000 if got some people on video :)

Roast them with a flamethrower foie gras anyone?

No...

Yes!

Throw them some alka-seltzer tablets, problem solved.