By Brooke - 14/08/2015 16:50 - United States - San Francisco

Today, a cute guy approached me at a nightclub. I was really excited, until he drunkenly slurred "Babe, I'd suck the farts from your asshole!" and then threw up everywhere. FML
I agree, your life sucks 25 730
You deserved it 2 332

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Top comments

Hope you got his number. He sounds like a keeper! :-/

Can't help but laugh at this. Someday you will probably look back and laugh too. As for now, FYL

Comments

At least he called you babe.

It was going so well until he told her he'd suck the farts from her asshole. Damn.

really? That line has worked dozens of times for me... must have been the puke

i really hope he^is joking because that is pretty pathetic

In the words of George Carlton, "Blow it out your ass!..."

Luckily he won't remember that...and I hope you don't have to remember it as well

She posted it on FML, pretty sure she will remember it.

I love obvious statements and push-up bras.

It's so vile he threw up just saying it!

Who doesn't love push-up bras? Best invention ever.

That's cool, too bad I don't own any..

Well, this thread is going off on a tangent.

Hope you got his number. He sounds like a keeper! :-/

Sounds like she got more than his number, fyl op.

Learn to take a compliment no matter how it is delivered.

Even if it was delivered anally?

How exactly is saying you would inhale someone's farts a compliment?

cmchappy 25

Would he hold it like a bong hit?

Well at least you can say you've never heard that pickup line before

I'm wondering if OP's admirer was Scottish - I've heard this one a couple of times. Along with "I'd eat a mile of your shite just to see where it comes from".

That's very revolting to here... why would you give that specific example?

can say I never wanted to hear that pickup line, EVER!!!

I've actually heard this one. wasn't said to me, thank god.

Maybe that's his thing

Both top comments have negative likes.

Hmmmm so does #10's funny how that happens, isn't it?

That's a great story to tell, I'm entertained and I don't even know you. As long as you didn't get any vomit on you, I'd consider that a plus.

Can't help but laugh at this. Someday you will probably look back and laugh too. As for now, FYL