FML : Today, a cute guy approached me at a nightclub. I was really excited, until he drunkenly slurred "Babe, I'd suck the farts from your asshole!" and then...

Today, a cute guy approached me at a nightclub. I was really excited, until he drunkenly slurred "Babe, I'd suck the farts from your asshole!" and then threw up everywhere. FML

I agree, your life sucks

You deserved it

By Brooke - / Friday 14 August 2015 16:50 / United States - San Francisco

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Top comments

By swanheart | 35

#6381281 - Saturday 15 August 2015 08:32

Hope you got his number. He sounds like a keeper! :-/

By iPixelCheese | 19

#6381305 - Saturday 15 August 2015 08:38

Can't help but laugh at this. Someday you will probably look back and laugh too. As for now, FYL

Comments

By Sebastian2022 | 22

#6381267 - Saturday 15 August 2015 08:28

At least he called you babe.

MikaykayUnicorn | 36

#6381289 - Saturday 15 August 2015 08:33

It was going so well until he told her he'd suck the farts from her asshole. Damn.

slackerjoe | 22

#6381908 - Sunday 16 August 2015 12:04

really? That line has worked dozens of times for me... must have been the puke

FreakyDino98 | 13

#6382535 - Sunday 16 August 2015 03:20

i really hope he^is joking because that is pretty pathetic

incoherentrmblr | 21

#6382741 - Sunday 16 August 2015 07:29

In the words of George Carlton, "Blow it out your ass!..."

By worldclassrager | 38

#6381271 - Saturday 15 August 2015 08:30

Luckily he won't remember that...and I hope you don't have to remember it as well

iPixelCheese | 19

#6381300 - Saturday 15 August 2015 08:37

She posted it on FML, pretty sure she will remember it.

By rileyrae0000 | 23

#6381275 - Saturday 15 August 2015 08:31

That is vile

crackajak | 15

#6381386 - Saturday 15 August 2015 10:11

I love obvious statements and push-up bras.

onlychildFTW | 33

#6381419 - Saturday 15 August 2015 11:56

It's so vile he threw up just saying it!

Aimeejasmine | 15

#6381506 - Saturday 15 August 2015 03:20

Who doesn't love push-up bras? Best invention ever.

rileyrae0000 | 23

#6381604 - Saturday 15 August 2015 05:34

That's cool, too bad I don't own any..

RenoTheRhino | 29

#6381634 - Saturday 15 August 2015 06:32

Well, this thread is going off on a tangent.

By swanheart | 35

#6381281 - Saturday 15 August 2015 08:32

Hope you got his number. He sounds like a keeper! :-/

seenoevil818 | 13

#6381348 - Saturday 15 August 2015 09:33

Sounds like she got more than his number, fyl op.

By Cads1 | 24

#6381288 - Saturday 15 August 2015 08:33

Learn to take a compliment no matter how it is delivered.

ohSNAPyall | 26

#6381342 - Saturday 15 August 2015 09:24

Even if it was delivered anally?

LyricaSilvan | 29

#6381486 - Saturday 15 August 2015 02:49

How exactly is saying you would inhale someone's farts a compliment?

cmchappy | 20

#6381499 - Saturday 15 August 2015 03:10

Would he hold it like a bong hit?

By arabian22 | 25

#6381292 - Saturday 15 August 2015 08:35

Well at least you can say you've never heard that pickup line before

lysx84 | 24

#6381347 - Saturday 15 August 2015 09:33

I'm wondering if OP's admirer was Scottish - I've heard this one a couple of times. Along with "I'd eat a mile of your shite just to see where it comes from".