The Best of the Worst of FML #90

Here's a selection of some of the worst, unpublishable FMLs we've received over the years. Read them and weep!

Hello everyone! It's a new month, so here's FML's monthly Best of the Worst of FML!

Even more proof that the internet is full of people who can claim that reality is stranger than fiction.

This is the July 2020 edition, which is in no way weirder than the state of the world at the moment. We need a break from reality, so for the people who've never seen this section of FML before, we get sent loads of FMLs, but we only publish a few, due to the fact that most aren't very good, and some are downright terrifying. Amongst those, we also get sent very stupid stories. Or "AAAAAAAAHHHHH?" as I like to call them. That's what we post in this feature.

Now, get ready, be prepared.
 

 

I, robot

Today this is a very important decision of my life, I met a girl and i am very much interested to talk, this is just for the quality and testing purpose. FML

 

All you need is hate

Well, just mark everything on this FML if you honestly HATE fortnite.FML

 

Stats, for some reason

so... I'm just gonna share my pc specs cpu: core 2 quad q8200 (11 year old) gpu: gt 730 (performing worse tthan it should ram: 2x2 GB (not 1 program can give me more data about it)

 

Going long

Today, I was helping my mom with these goodbye gifts that she was making. Cups, with peoples names on them. This is the third time I have fixed this because the person that is helping us print it keeps saying there is a problem. She told me Today to do it for her a last time. I deleted the old draft after she said that the edits are ok. Out of frustration I said 'wow what a waste of my time.' I was annoyed and my mom decided to blow up on me. She says how her whole life has been wasted on me, how I am a waste, things like that. Honestly its to a point where you know what, that bitch can just go fuck herself. Now she is mad at me for absolutely no reason and she has no right to be mad at me. FML

 

Anger management

Today, The majority of poster making sites not having the simple option that i'm looking for makes me wanna skullfuck the creators and slit their throats. they deserved to have their arms pulled out and be burnt alive.. FML

 

All shook up

Last night I met up with a girl she was shook when she saw my dick she made me feel some type of way when we kissed but I’m just shook that she said she was shook with my dick

 

Trufax

No matter how much you wiggle and dance the last two drops always end in your pants

 

More stats

Today, Now the Asian handicap odd is Aves -0, high return. Hosts are not favorites of this clash. However, Aves suffered 3 consecutive losses, but Belenenses kept unbeaten records in 4 games.. FML

 

Surfing

AFTER 7 YEARS OF FIGHT I WAS FINALLY GOOD BUT A WAVE CAME AND IT TAKES ME BACK WITH IT JUST ONE FUC*** DAY.FML

 

Oh no

my matey offered to log into his Spotify premium account on my phone. As I gave him my phone I felt the urge to shit. I went to the bathroom and ended up having a serious case of diarrhea and was stuck in there for a solid 20 minutes without my phone.

 

That's it for now. We'll be back in August for some more weirdness, because there's plenty more in our backlog. You can probably see some yourself while they are being sent in by using the Moderate the FMLs feature on our website/app. As usual, these all have been collected from the website right from the very beginning, so don't bother trying to send in your own weird stories to try and get them published in here, it won't work. We can spot the phonies!

Take care!

 

 

 

 

 

Bonus track - Our missing feature
  

Maybe one day

I tried AGAIN to make this app dark mode but IT DOESNT EXSIST FOR SOME REASON.

By Alan / Wednesday 8 July 2020 12:12 /
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