The Best of the Worst of FML #45
Hello everyone! Once again, here's FML's weekly Best of the Worst! Even more proof that the internet is full of people who can claim that reality is stranger than fiction.
For the people who've never seen this section of FML before, we get sent loads of FMLs, but we only publish a few, due to the fact that most aren't very good, and some are downright terrifying. Amongst those, we also get sent very dumbass stories. Or "dingleberries" as I like to call them. That's what we post in this feature. Now, get ready, be prepared.
Ear zits are a thing?
So I was textin my friend that my mom was popping my ear zits. I said it felt like Satan was raping my ear canal! My friend then asked me if I cried sometimes when she does it. I replied sometimes. She called me a “PussyxD” FML. -_-
Attempt to misuse our comments
who win in fight goku or superman...lol decide below in the comments
hey wtf mario you stole my fuckin star bitch wtf is not Mario party is WALUIGI PARTY now cuz imma fuk u up lol you dont just steal stars from ppl and just for that imma go into the game and poop on you...even tho nintedo games dont have poop in them
Today, I had a nightmare about a demon girl. I now take a Lego figure into the shower with me and talk to it to take my mind off the nightmare, thinking that she will appear in the bathroom. FML
so at school theirs this kid that everyone thinks is stupid hes grades are really bad like all fs any way my school does this reward ceremony at the end of the year where the 3 kids who got the highest scores on test on certain subjects get a reward he won all of them except math....................
today I found and nice way to say hi lol it was bye....FML
Christmas confuses some people
today..fml these fucking elves are real, i thought insanity was a more liable conclusion.
Mean Girls rip-off
Today, i said to some random in the mall, “if your from africa, then why are you white”. Turns out she is actually a black african who has the skin pigmentation disease that turns your skin white. I now how a broken nose and a bruised eye. FML
Not so NORMAL
today i told this really HOTT guy that i have a really big crush on him. he doesnt texts back until three days later. he said that he only dated normal people! WHAT THE FUCK IS HE TALKING ABOUT??? I AM NOT NORMAL? FML
Today I went around Egypt with my uncle, who ended up buying a book about mummification at a gift store. Later tonight, I heard him making odd sounds so I decided to check on him. He had egyptian makeup on and was masturbating to the mummies in the book. FML
That's it for now. We'll be back next week for some more weirdness because there's plenty more in our backlog. You can probably see some yourself while they are sent in by using the Moderate the FMLs feature on our website/app. As usual, these all have been collected from the website right from the very beginning, so don't bother trying to send in your own weird stories to try and get them published in here, it won't work. We can spot the phonies. Take care!
Bonus track: A new way of life :
Today is bye FML. Please bye FML.