The Best of the Worst #28
Hello everyone. Well, November is almost over, but it's the last Wednesday of the month, and we've decided that it'll be the day we release the monthly Best of the Worst of FML. Let's take a gander at this week's collection.
For the people who have never seen this section of FML before: we get sent lots of FMLs, each day, all day. We only publish a few due to the fact that a lot are not very good, copies of old FMLs or just not funny. Amongst those, we also get sent very weird stories, if you can call them stories. That's what we post in this column. Here we go for November's selection.
Today, I love myself. sometimes when I take showers I jump up and down! :-)
go ahead ask me how many painkillers i just took and how many more im about to take. i dare you
my funnys thing ever was went i was 2 year old i wore my dad’s shoes to nursery
My favourite dress
its 725 in the morin and my fuckin liddke couse wont get dress and im dum tired den i have this lady screaming here . Fml
Dog day afternoon
Today… infront of my whole classroom i accidently shouted “Oh my dog!” At that moment i got bitten by the spider that i got scared at and now im sitting im hospital. FML
Today I was whacking off in a sock. I felt something hard inside the sock but just whacked it harder. I will have surgery tomorrow for the small pebble in my penis hole. FML
Patrick Duffy strikes again
Today, woke up looked at my phone, saw noo messages, txted patrick ( ex bf) he hasnt respponded!! last nite was he was guna cut if i wldnt go bck wit him but he did me soo bogus idfk wat tah do!!!! he makin me wonder if he did somethin reli bad and is he still alive!!??
Some people will actually agree with this
Today, I found out my sister is gay/lesbian. As a scientists I can’t comprehend why a human could even want another that can’t procreate to, more often than not, better society. On a side note I feel cheated of a biological nephew or niece.
Effing Perverts!!! Those bastards keep passing comments while i play bball!?! WTF! No unity in my batch!?!! WTF is wrong with ppl!?! SELFISH EGOIST EFFING PPL! . I hate this new place , FML :|
Today, I was drawing a “Sexy Shrek” because my friend dared me to. My little brother came in, and, upon seeing the drawing, got a massive erection. FML.
That's it for November. We'll probably be back next month, on the last Wednesday of the month, for some more weirdness because there's plenty more in our backlog. You can probably see some yourself while they are sent in by using the "Moderate the FMLs" feature on our website/app. As usual, these all have been collected from the website right from the very beginning, so don't bother trying to send in your own weird ramblings to try and get them published in here, it won't work. We can spot the phonies. Take care!
Bonus track: The dog decides, or you do.
Today, FMLers, your call: my dog appears to prefer my daughters used maxi pads over mine. The dog is a bloodhound. I swear I am not making this up.