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Boss move! Now, when normal office work restarts, no one will steal your lunch. First, they know you're a badass, and second, they're afraid of what they may find (like a human forearm you gnaw on.)

There are so many worse things that could’ve happened in that scenario lol. At least it wasn’t porn!

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Boss move! Now, when normal office work restarts, no one will steal your lunch. First, they know you're a badass, and second, they're afraid of what they may find (like a human forearm you gnaw on.)

"Today, I accidentally admitted I was the Zodiac Killer, but I'm covering my tracks by claiming I was listening to a true crimes podcast. I really have to stop drinking absinthe. FML." That's what you're really saying, isn't it?

I didn't think Ted Cruz knew of FML!

There are so many worse things that could’ve happened in that scenario lol. At least it wasn’t porn!

At least it wasn't porn?