It&#039;s National Nurses Day! Here Are 15 FMLs About Nurses.

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Today, I'm so deprived of female attention that I got a hard-on when a nurse told me I have beautiful veins. FML

2. Yeesh.

By i fuckin love habaneros - 22/7/2016 19:19 - United States - Charlottesville

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Today, I was volunteering at a local hospital. I was eagerly introducing myself to all the nurses, as I would be working with them all summer. It wasn't until I got home that I discovered the giant piece of lettuce stuck in my front teeth. So much for first impressions. FML

3. At least they won't forget you!

By nothing_nobody - 23/6/2016 01:31

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Today, I took my AP US History exam. For some reason, my school let the school nurse proctor the exam. She read the instructions for the wrong test and told us to seal up our tests, despite having another section left in that book. She wouldn't listen to us when we tried to tell her. FML

4. Aren't they supposed to be smart?

By soccerswim20 - 19/5/2016 00:46 - United States - Coatesville

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Today, while working for a hospital security company, I had to assist in restraining a male patient while the nurses put a catheter in him. All I will say is that it looked like a worm trying to swallow a straw. FML

5. Annnnd, thank you for that visual.

By Shock - 21/3/2016 20:12 - United States - Littleton

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Today, I donated blood for the first time. It wasn't until I passed out on the ice during hockey practice that I remembered the nurse warning me not to do any type of exercise. FML

6. Listen to your nurses, people.

By ktm1313 - 26/1/2016 21:38 - United States - Cleveland

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Today, I was at work and a lady came in with a cake - I work as a nurse in a pediatrics ward. While we were eating the cake, she told us she used her breast milk instead of normal milk. Now all of us nurses have to be tested. FML

7. But WHY?

By bunyipp - 23/9/2017 04:00 - Australia - Macquarie Park

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Today, working as a CNA, my nurse convinced me that in order to collect a stool sample, you had to have the patient take a dump in your hand. I only found out he was kidding after I collected the sample. FML

8. Seems like your fault for believing that.

By poop hands - 20/12/2016 03:50 - United States - Salt Lake City

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Today, is my first day as a student nurse. It was also the first day I learnt I was allergic to latex gloves. FML

9. Time to consider a new career.

By curiousminx - 6/12/2016 02:32 - Australia - Morningside

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Today, during my shift as a vet nurse, I picked up a gorgeous cat for cuddles, only to discover it was covered with pee. And now I am too. I still have 4 hours of my shift. FML

10. Kitty nurse is officially job goals.

By Anonymous - 19/10/2016 10:54 - Australia - Brisbane

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Today, I'm officially a week overdue. I went to the hospital, thinking I was in labor since I was in so much pain. Turns out it was just gas. The nurse couldn't hold back her look of pity as she told me this. FML

11. GET THIS BABY OUT OF ME.

By herestowaiting - 30/8/2016 20:56 - United States - Detroit

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Today, a nurse berated me for not being able to lift my leg myself so she could put a cast on. My leg is broken in two places. FML

12. It seems like there may be something preventing you from being successful here.

By cerulean - 10/10/2017 01:30

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Today, at the doctor's, I dropped my pants and the attractive nurse assured me it was the biggest one she had ever seen. Unfortunately, she wasn't referring to my penis, she was, in fact referring to the huge haemorrhoid hanging out of my asshole. FML

13. What a let down.

By mind your own business - 5/10/2017 06:00 - United Kingdom - Leeds

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Today, on the way to class, I got distracted while watching some ducks and walked face- first into a concrete pole. I ended up with a black eye and three stitches. Even the nurse laughed. FML

14. But were the ducks cute?

By duckyou - 2/4/2018 01:30

What the Duck?

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Today, I was suspended for "selling drugs on campus". I was trying to give the school nurse approved medication for my severe epilepsy. I'm suspended for 3 weeks and have to go to a drug seminar. FML

15. Stop selling drugs, kids.

By why - 20/1/2018 15:00

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