Here Are The 21 Funniest Tweets Of The Week!
1. Things are looking grim.
Day 13857 without sex https://t.co/MFD4lX7LnY— HONEY COCAINE.🌺 (@prettyflaca) July 15, 2018
2. Yeah I've seen this movie that's gonna be a no from me
No thanks, I've seen the lovely bones. https://t.co/hmmxsUWCCe— ℒauryn (@LAVRHONEY) July 15, 2018
3. Rude af.
me: wow is that a mocking bird— Shen the Bird (@Shen_the_Bird) July 15, 2018
mocking bird: "WoW iS tHaT a MoCkInG bIrD" fuck you
4. Please listen to her laugh.
The girls laugh is actually a whole mood https://t.co/kd0hBR7RDl— diana (@dianaabigail_) July 15, 2018
5. RIP Vine.
I miss vine so much pic.twitter.com/HF0OpGjaHp— Ashley (@buymepizzaaa) July 15, 2018
6. TREAT. YO. SELF.
The problem with “treat yo self” is that I don’t know how to stop. I had a bad day in April and I’ve been treating myself ever since— kyle (@itsdjluigi) July 19, 2018
7. Your Darwin dollars a work
This is just natural selection. Mans was tryna fill a box with holes in it. https://t.co/IbrIaa9lfD— Dev🔌 (@Dvyn__) July 14, 2018
Brain cell 1: say have a nice day— Cam u not? (@cman525) July 17, 2018
Brain cell 2: nah say have a good one
Mouth: Haven gice done
9. Exhibit A: Why you don't shop online.
so i ordered this hoping to look like him but i really just look like a gay priest. just thought i’d share in case you’re in need of a good laugh pic.twitter.com/v1Vy6xnPkQ— joshua david™ (@joshxdavid) July 16, 2018
10. The ghostess with the mostest.
After my funeral someone hack my page and say “appreciate y’all coming out”— Ke (@that_kid_keajah) July 18, 2018
11. She really be working it
I’ve never felt more disrespected in my life. The AUDACITY. pic.twitter.com/jGSXHpHe36— kaela (@mikaela_autumn) July 15, 2018
12. This took me a few reads to get but it was worth it.
Don’t you hate it when you think you see a good parking spot but then you turn the corner and Stuart fucking little is parked there— toasted john (@johnistoasted) July 18, 2018
13. The tea.
oh absolutely not https://t.co/OJbSZHitRJ— Teen Vogue (@TeenVogue) July 16, 2018
starbucks: we’ve banned plastic straws!— gracie hoos (@cottoncandaddy) July 17, 2018
me: oh hell yes
starbucks: yeah we’ve got these cool new lids instead
me: what are they made of
starbucks: wait shit
also, if someone offers u a mozzarella stick and u turn it down, ur a narc— Beerbongs & Bentleys (@PostMalone) July 14, 2018
16. RT If you thought you expected the unexpected but then what you got was really unexpected.
r/unexpected pic.twitter.com/pXqPOiT5ul— m (@meekzthrowaway) July 15, 2018
17. Never has a button been more necessary.
That's for when ya mama pull up and you forgot to take the chicken out the freezer https://t.co/QSJ60jxN3w— Tᴡᴇɴᴛʏ ᴊᴜᴀɴ sᴀᴠᴀɢᴇ (@juannisaac) July 16, 2018
18. ...I never realized how much true this is until this moment.
how are unicorns fake but giraffes are real like what’s more believable a horse with a horn or a leopard-moose-camel with a 40 foot neck— Kyle Brownlee (@_kylebrownlee) July 14, 2018
when u carry ur pet to ur room n it walks out https://t.co/GDLi7Yta9e— zach (@actualzach) July 14, 2018
20. This is a good man.
my drunk ASS boyfriend just asked me “whos the handsomest man in the world” and i said “uh.. you?” and he goes “false its fucking Ryan Reynolds”— dylan (@dylanceeee) July 14, 2018
21. But really though.
2002:— anthony (@xforcades2) July 17, 2018
“Don’t get in the car with strangers”
“Don’t meet people from the internet”