By HSPARKS - 12/5/2020 05:00

Big baby man

Today, I woke up to my apartment in a state of total disarray. I've been asking my boyfriend to get either get a job, or clean the house. I just had a bunch of dental work taken care of. He doesn't have a job, and doesn't want to find one. I'm tired of trying to raise an already grown man. FML
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By  Rae Miller  |  10

Take it from someone who put up with that kind of shit for 11 years. He isn’t going to change. Better cut your losses now than when you are married or have kids.

By  Jaymail  |  17

You need to have a really good talk with yourself. Perhaps with a Counselor or some other trusted adult. Take a couple of days. And then ask yourself if you are better off WITH or WITHOUT him. This present Virus has us all stressed out. I understand the unemployment rate is as low as it was during the 1929 Stock Market Crash. So please don’t come down on him to hard for being unemployed until after the virus is over. There MAY NOT BE any real jobs presently out there. DO make him accountable for cleaning and doing chores. If you decide to keep him then give him some sort of an incentive once he completes each task. To let him know that you notice. And that you care.

  mekiswrite  |  21

OP shouldn't have to give him an incentive to clean a house he lives in. If he can't pay rent, he either needs to contribute in another way or find a different place to live. I do agree, however, that OP needs to consider what she is getting out of being with him.

By  mayaklast  |  12

The simple fact that you had to ask is a big red flag. He has to get his shit together on his own, for your and his sake, and making someone do things by blackmailing them with the end of the relationship doesn't seem healthy either. Considering the relationship is clearly no longer working for you, I'd say ending it is a no brainer...