Almost father

birth control dumbass!

Op should've taken some of his girlfriend birth control just to be extra safe.

YDI for having sex at 15 and not using enough protection.

Birth control is easily available, no pity here for OP or his girlfriend. 15 is way too young.

I don't understand you, 13?

where I am, 15 is only a year before technically its legal to have sex with someone your own age..
and you don't know how close she is to 16...

admittedly they should have been more careful.. people have to remember condoms can break.. :/

Well, it's the US so 15 is quite illegal for having sex, and if the dad is so inclined, he can have the boy friend charged with statutory rape, which, if she is pregnant, will most certainly result in a conviction, and label OP as a sex offender for the rest of his life. The dad cleaning his guns is the LEAST of OP's worries. He should be worried about how fucked his future is about to be.

dead baby jokes might actually be appropriate for this guy...

you had sex with a 15-year-old. good going, genius.

I'm just wondering how old op is. 14? 20? same age, eh.. sex happens at that age, shoulda been more careful, idiot. couple years ooolder and you're a dumbass, no wonder daddy was pissed off.. enjoy jail!

52- gr4m4r c0rr3kktshin CaPiT41lze the b3g1nn1n of sentencez

I think 13 meant that OP's girlfriend may not be pregnant but only thinks she is...like a whole bunch of other 15 year old sex monkeys.

15 is definitely way to young to be having sex..and everyone here is right. condoms are easy to come by and not very expensive at all. OP coulda gotten a 40 pack at walmart for less than 10 bucks..it may be cheaper I can't remember. he totally deserves it.

and to #33 yes a condom can break. but from someone who has had one break while in the act..1) it is quite obvious the feeling is completely different. and 2) idk if this happens every time but for us there was a popping sound when it busted. it makes more sense to think of the condom having a hole some getting through when he came (that's why guys should always pull out..condom or no condom) that being if they used protection and from watching A LOT of 16 and pregnant..they probably didn't. not a single teen on that show said yes we used protection. they all said no.

Too many negative votes, comment buried. Show the comment

You guys need to put this into perspective though... Just imagine the horror of walking in on a guy buffing his arms, it's not pretty.

42 - He can't be charged with anything if he's a minor too. I doubt her father would let her go out with a legal adult if he's the type to clean his guns in front of her boyfriends.

I thought me friend was young! She had sex with her past boyfriends multiple times around 13.

Not saying I agree or anything, but the past generations have no idea what most teens do. Nearly every person at my school tokes, and hundreds of the people in the school have had sex, gotten BJs or other sexual things I don't even want to think about. Kids are having sex younger and younger and this is at a Catholic school. Where very few of us including myself are actually religious. I just hate to see these adults on this site not realizin their kids are doing much worse than you think.

4T OnHundR3d G000ddd F1nallllly CoRr3ct Gr4mAR

I can appreciate your heartfelt sympathy Sarababyyy94, but you need to work on your supporting statements. "...smart enough to post an FML"? Seriously?

dumd ass probably wanted to be on 16 and pregnant

actually, in certain states 15 is legal. here in Michigan, and most other states, 16 is the age of consent. while in other places, such as Hawaii, kids as young as 12 can legally have sex( weird huh?). the age of consent is the states choice 16 is just the normal age chosen. still... YDI OP. I won't be a hypocrite and say wait till marriage, but if you cant handle the possible consequence of having your balls shot off by your baby mama's father then you shouldn't be having sex.

Anybody who knows how to type and form actual sentences should be able to properly post an FML. It's not that difficult.

Actually 101, he CAN and WILL be charged, even as a minor. That's the difference between statutory rape, and rape.

not cheaper, condoms (decent ones at least) are almost 1$ a pop. They can go get it at planned parenthood though rather than having unwanted babies and spreading their diseases

101: Yes, yes he can. The law concerning statutory rape in the U.S. is bias to the female. Basically stated, it says if you have sex with a girl under 18 your a sex offender regardless of your age. However, the loophole in that is if she was over the "age of consent" which varies from state to state. Also, even if she was past the age of consent, a parent would have to consent to the relationship being sexual. I doubt "ex-military" dad would go for that. XD

#148: You're saying if a 15 y/o boy and girl both willingly have sex, then it's still statutory rape for the male?

That doesn't sound right. Talk about double standards? I'm hoping that's just in the US, as i already know you've got crazy laws...

119 - lol I was thinking the same thing. I mean how many times have we all seen a post that makes us think "holy shot how did this guy/gal even made it through life to this point? "today, I thought it would be cool to light a trash can on fire with a motorboat's engine. my fathers boat proceeded to explode, FML" like seriously.

* I'm more then half asleep and on my phone. Not going to try and grammar Nazi myself. any grammar Nazi's out there, you have my permission. Go for it.

Wait. If they're both minors, how is it statutory rape?

148, I'm assuming you don't know much about the law.... what the hell is the point of the age of consent if at any age you can still be charged with statutory rape? I'm pretty sure if both parties are under 18 and older than the age of consent it's perfectly legal and just frowned upon.

If he's 16 or older that's likely statutory rape.

It's only statutory rape if he is over 18. I assume he is since he felt the need to state her age. If they're both 15, they should have been more careful, but that's not too young to be having sex, it's only a year younger than when you can drive in America.

Wrong FML, buddy...unless you were just referencing that one...

with a minor, no less.

Keyman. everyone is so quick to pull the rape card. yes they are both minors and yes it is a federal thing. but. if the op can step up and take care of the child....the kid made a mistake. n if he admits up to it that's no reason to fuck up the kids entire life based on a mistake he knows he made

Why does everyone think that this can be a legal issue? Unless they were on different sides of the age of consent in their state, it doesn't matter. They can do what they want.

Anyway, YDI for being a dumbass, having sex when you weren't ready for kids, and/or not using contraception.

A female can be guilty of statutory rape as well as a male. If a female age 25 has consensual sex with a male under the age of consent she is guilty of statutory rape as well. Further, in most states the statutory rape laws are written to exclude punishing minors for having sex with other minors.

Jesus fucking Christ Tweetbaby, you're the one who doesn't know law. My father is an Lawyer, and so I've grown up with law in my life. And the lowest age of consent is 16 in the United States. 15 is not an age of consent in any part of the US.

212, I think the legal driving age also depends on the state... I have a friend from south Carolina I believe that got his license at 15.

DON'T worry about the firearms for now.

DO worry about your Statutory Rape conviction. Your teen ass is going to pull the entire train every night while serving that 4-7 year prison stretch. "Big Frank", "Butterbean", "Bug", "Grippo", and "Skint-back" are going to just love playing choo-choo with you boy.

THEN in 5 years you can worry about the guns, and paying child support for the next 15 years.

I bet you wishing you had kept your "wonder-weasel" behind that zipper, aren't you boy?

LOL!

thank you 235. some people are coming across dumb because they think they know everything.

the legal consent age in Oklahoma is 14/16

because your parent is a lawyer doesn't mean you know every law and loop-hole, my dear. actually, in Hawaii (I had a bit of misinformation earlier), the youngest a person can have sex is 14 and the other person they want to have sex can be no more than 5 years older than themselves. boom.

@178. It is statutory rape because the girl is under the age of consent. The Law (basically identical in all 50 states) says that if she is not at the age of consent (Canada its 16, 16-18 in the US-- it varies by State), IT DOES NOT MATTER THAT ONE OR BOTH PARTIES willingly engaged in sex.... because a person below the age of consent does not have the mental capability to make the informed, correct decision to have sex.

Hey... I know... some of you think you know, but the Law has to create an arbitrary line in the sand somewhere.

P.S. Whether one or both parties do not want to file criminal charges does not matter. Because Statutory Rape is a Criminal Violation, the State (Law Enforcement or Prosecutors) file the charges.

More like do have sex with a fifteen year old

haha lol

216 - I was just using that as a referece

Two minors (that is, two people under the age of consent) do not have to worry about statutory rape laws. Statutory rape laws are created to prevent adults from having sex with teenagers, not to prevent teens from
having sex. No matter the ages, as long as OP is not above the age of consent, statutory rape charges cannot be filed. Even if he was 18, he might still be protected, depending on the state. For example, in Texas there is an affirmative defense against statutory rape that legally protects the older party as long as the couple meets certain requirements (such as that the relationship is not incest, and that their age differential is not over a certain number).

And to whoever posted the idiotic comment that "the difference between statutory rape and rape is age," you are completely wrong. RAPE is the act of having sex with someone forcibly, STATUTORY RAPE is the act of having sex with someone consensually, but is not legally capable of making their own decisions.

It's only illegal if the guy is 18 and over and it was done without consent from the girl. The guy never posted his age so can't really tell.

correct me if I'm wrong but isn't it only statutory rape id OP is at least 18?

169, okay. "than".

and your fucked

actually 259, the age if consent is 14 in Idaho and (I believe) Hawaii. but you are correct that minors can be charged with statutory rape.

scratch that. I was using outdated info. But still, minors below the age of consent can be charged with statutory rape (varying from state to state.)

condom- $1.25
child- $6487376489403837.73

what's the point of having an age to legally have sex if nobody follows them and they know they will just get a slap on the wrist?

1) The phrase statutory rape is a term used in some legal jurisdictions to describe sexual relations that occur when one participant is below the age required to legally consent to the behavior. ...
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Statutory_rape

2) A legal term describing sexual intercourse between an adult and a minor . The adult can be found guilty of statutory rape in courts of law even if the minor was a willing partner. See the entire definition of Statutory rape
www.emedicinehealth.com/sexual_assault/glossary_em.htm

262- I live in south carolina and you cannot get your full license at 15, only your restricted. Check up on your facts.

he can be charged with statutory rape depending on how the girlfriend would testify, or the father, since she's pregnant the trial would be in favor of sending the boyfriend to jail.

NO ONE GIVES A FUCK. if you wanna have sex go screw every willing person you can find no matter what your age k. STFU

people should understand that statutory rape laws are different with every state. Where I'm from, a 15 year old can have legal sex with a 12 year old, a 17 year old can legally have sex with a 15 year old, and anyone 16 and over can legally have sex with a 16 year old. its pointless to argue about a law that no one knows the specifics on

i hope u know birthcontrol can fail. .its better having a condom on aswell. increases ur chances of no mistakes

true!

I like turtles!

Abortion, if she's fine with that kind of stuff

dude take one of his bullets instead because that is exactly what you did by being a dumbass and not being careful by using protection correctly

fagol!

15 isn't necessarily young. all my friends are having sex and they're 14-16. it's not bad as long as you love and trust the person. but op deserves it for not using enough protection.

42 - you are 100% wrong. Even though they are underage the boy will not be listed as a sex offender most places in the United States, and the boy will get the SAME punishment as the girl. They are both underage, they both broke the law.

88- Sara? 0.o

having sex doesn't make you a whore. doesn't matter how old you are as long as you love the person. you're judgmental.

I hate stupid people please look it up statutory rape is the act of an adult participating in sexual activities with a minor whether he gets jailed or not for sex without consent unless he's 18 or older it won't be for statutory rape period

agreed

seriously this is your fault. ever heard of a condom?

statutory rape pertains to both female and male involved in the sexual activity and even if both of them consent the parents can still sue . if both are under the age of consent it is rape but if one of them is over the age of consent it is statutory rape but again the parents can sue even with consent in either case

shes probably gonna be in another season of teen mom

"teen pregnancy is 100% preventable"!

The pull out is meant to work!

430- So if you had a daughter, it's ok for her to have sex at age 12 because "it doesn't matter how old you are, as long as you love the person" ???

if the OP is over 16 then the father can charge him with stashiatory rape. use protection next time.

101, I have a friend that dated an 18 year old while she was 14...

i hope you realise it's a statuary rape only when the guy is over 18 which I seriously doubt about, given that his gf's dad is an ex-military so he wouldn't allow her precious daughter to date a guy 4 (or more) years older than her. So I don't think it's a lawsuit he needs to think about rather then a real-life "16 and pregnant".

Stupid mistake tough, if you want to have sex at such a young age you should AT LEAST be extra careful. FYL

Yes, don't forget to use birth control or it'll go bad... your an example.

There is no such thing as "love" at that age, only infatuation mistaken as it. If you're friends don't understand that, then they really are too young. It is their choice as to what to do with their bodies, but they should realize that sex is not nearly as meaningful to guys as it is to girls and viceversa. In other words, in a girl's mind they'd be making love, but in a guy's mind they'd be getting laid. There are exceptions of course, but more often than not this is the case.

102: That's not entirely true. In the 15th century, girls were married aeay when they were 13 and they would have sex very early because they died really early. Times have changed since then obviously, but teens are experimenting from an earlier age than before. These things do happen. But I still thinks that you should be more careful.

Are personal guns allowed everywhere in USA? That could possibly narrow the states.

For everyone saying that he should of use a condom. Maybe he did use a condom, but it might of broke. Also, birth control isn't a sure way to not have a baby. It may reduce your chance by 80-90%, but it doesn't always work. Basically, the only ways to not have a baby while having sex is anal.

well if you aren't ready for responsibility then you should not have done the deed

It's called masturbation. Do it.

Agreed!

538- I'm not sure about everywhere but I know military or police officer automatically gives you a concealed weapons permit...alsoI know it is legal to have a gun in your house or car (must stay in one of those places thought) without a concealed weapons permit in quite a few states. Pretty much the permit just allows you to take your gun out on public..However, I know that you don't need a permit in West Virginia.

Whose to say he doesn't claim statuary rape? If they are both 15, neither can make their own decisions. She could claim it and so could he. Point of it all is that they are both dumb and should have used protection.

23- it was a previous FML

I saw that FML it was hilarious, perfect time to use it!!!!

he can still be charged

I can appreciate your attitude :)

yup i can imagine a dumb ass talking abt law & telling " my father is AN lawyer !

292, I was talking about if they were both minors. In the instance that both parties were under the age of consent, it would not be statutory rape.

LMFAO, listen boyo, I know your pain, I haven't been there but I can imagine how that may feel like. You are in ninth grade, so am I, they teach how to use condoms so do it ok? If you are a sophomore who is with a freshman, then you're just a dumbass and there is NO hope for you. key word in this article: CONDOMS... TROJAN WAR... FIRE AND ICE... ring a bell?

88, pulling out does NOT work. You can stick the tip in then out real quick and she could still get become pregnant.

should have had protection but u got 3 options keep it, make her accidentally fall on her stomach or abortion

Uhm..

Okay, first obvious response: Don't you kids use protection when having sex? Just because you're young and stupid doesn't mean you cumming inside her won't cause the ussual effects it does with other people (pregnancy).

Answer to condom breaking: I've had, in my entire life (I'm 32) not even one condom break. But that's maybe because I buy proper quality condoms. Which are also much better than the cheapest shit you get at gas stations.
(Not to mention the fact that half my girlfriends have been allergic to latex)

haha yeah. in the words of Asher Roth,"when it comes to condoms, put two on; and tomorrow night, find a new joint"

just going to put this out there because the generations have really changed and it relly doesn't surprise me that they've had sex. I'm fourteen and at least half of my friends have had sex. I know it ain't right but try and give them a little break. he's going to be going through a hard enough time dealing with his family and his girlfriends family. I'll probably get thumbed down but I just wanted to share..

maybe every 15 year old isn't like you.

its not about the age its about the maturity
i started having sex at the age of 14 and never got any of my girlfriends pregnant

she means a lot of girls think they are pregnant when they really aren't, it's just all there head.

i agree 13

actually if they are less than 4 years older but still under 18 its legal

shutup Muslim

ya think??!

we all make mistakes I lost my virginity at 15... it happens oh well. make the best of it!

on a side note... damn she's just a year too young to have her own show!! ;)

Birth control doesn't always work. I'm living proof of that.

just living life the way it needs to be. u might die young and if I did I wouldn't want people to feel bad because my life sucked ;p but ya that was a tahded move

well said

Just to let you know, yes we kids do use protection. Things do happen, I've already had two condoms break, and I was using Trojan brand condoms, which are supposed to be good. So you just never know, don't jump to conclusions because he may have been using protection.

Yaa dirty jersey!!

You're dead, OP.

gay

if he is also 15 he wouldn't be charged with shit. your a moron

Minors can, and have, been charged with sexual assault. Don't go around thinking that means dick in court. There's even a couple of 15 year olds both registered as sex offenders for having sex with each other--In their state, by law, having sex with a 15 year old is sexual assault, even if it's another 15 year old.

I hope you realize you better consult with a lawyer before making stupid comments. It varies by state, and in some states, having sex with a 15 year old is defined as either gross sexual imposition or rape. It doesn't say, "if you're over 18." Teens HAVE been jailed because they thought they knew what you think you know.

If you ain't gonna sack it, go home and whack it.

If your 15 as well as your girlfriend OP, I think you two shouldn't really be having sex. I mean you two should really wait until you two are really committed. Call me crazy but if that kid is yours, OP I wish you well in your future.

So you have to be smart to post on FML? Have you read half of the posts here?

Couldn't she be charged also? If they are both 15, then just because she's pregnant means she doesn't get charged?

He's hinting that he needs help.

Good luck op. ur gonna need it!

Yeah I had an ex with a dad like that I offered to help and he didn't ask anymore...

C00l St0ry, Tell it ag4ain. I lolololololololol'd LiKe Forr H0uRs

YDI for having sex that early... naughty naughty

looks like abortion may be an option?

Op's gf's dad is probably ex military cause he killed someone

74- Your dog looks exactly like mine did. when he was younger.

why's everyone trolling the kid at least he got some but he's going to pay for it.

I look forward to seeing them on MTV!

Should have used protection if you knew her dad is like that, or you should just always use it.

Hey OP did you want "idiot" carved on your tombstone? I can SO do that.

first of all 15 is a bit too young and if u r definately gonna do it, protection shud be the first thing on your mind.

if he wasn't smart enough to use protection, he shouldn't have banged her in the first place.

Yeah... Op totally had this coming. No sympathy for ya there mate.

I totally agree condoms should have been used it bugs me when people are like o heck no I don't want to have kids right now but they don't even try to use protection if you don't want kids you better wrap it before you tap it or take birth control and if you really don't want kids use both for extra protection even though you can still get pregnant there's a less chance

You totally Deserved it!!

yes and he's gonna die now haha

true

it's for humanity sake

15? even if you're the same age, wtf are you thinking.

Too many negative votes, comment buried. Show the comment

he was probably thinking "oh he wants to have sex." lol is teens having sex still frowned upon?

I'm 16 and I first had sex with my girlfriend when we were 15. Teens also have sexual needs and just as adults it's hard for us to resist the temptation. Teens just need to be smart enough to use birth control every time.

Well, I'm a tad late on my comment.

pulling out is not in the least bit effective.... the most simple method is to abstain from any sex, but that's more easily said than done when it comes to most people.

#177, people don't have sexual NEEDS, they have sexual desires. You can't use the "needs" thing as justification for having sex. You have sex because you want to. It's not because you need to.

i turned 18 a few months ago and i think 15 is ridiculous, all young girls are little whores these days.

#177 NEEDS?! no , it's wants. you shouldn't be having sex at such a young age when you don't know what you're doing or risking. at 16 you lack responsibility. that's why so many girls get pregnant and left because most guys don't wanna deal with it. it's a horrible experience raising a child before you have lived your life. that's why having sex so young is stupid. at least wait a year with a person you really love for sex, because that would have meaning.

138 and 177 you both look like complete jackasses. it's not cool to have sex at 15. it just makes you look like an idiot. ugh. I see these girls walking around dressed like little whores. I'm 20 and some of the things these little 13 yr olds wear are too revealing for ME! our country is fucked

Technically you don't need anything unless you want something so...

Perfect response. The fact that Junior thinks he has "needs" (versus "wants") is clear and irrefutable evidence that he does not have sufficient mental capacity to make an informed decision to have sex (except perhaps with his hand).

Until you can pay to raise a child every day until they are 18 years old, you better cock-block yourself boy.

And I do mean BOY.

All the little girls and boys see sex on tv and want to experience it. But they should wait a few years. 15 is way too young. At least wait until you are 17 people... it's not that hard. Plus you should always use protection if you aren't looking to have a child! So YDI kid...

242 Me and my girlfriend did wait for a year before having sex. I knew the risks and made sure I took precautions. Even after having sex I spent days contemplating over what I would do if my gf did become pregnant. I myself have always wanted to be a father and although I know I'm not ready, if I did have a child I am ready to do whatever I can to raise it correctly. But both of us have been raised in extremely conservative families so we decided to hold off on having sex until we were sure we would be able to handle everything that is associated with having a child. Although we have had sex a couple times since then because of our sexual DESIRES if you must bitch about it, we've been doing pretty well.

I'm just saying. Not every teen who has sex is a fuckin whore. Sex is a way to connect on a different level and in my opinion, it does make a relationship stronger if both parties know what precautions they have to take and they know what they will have to do in the event of pregnancy. I STRONGLY believe that teens should not have sex unless they are serious about their relationships.

I agree with #237. Having sex that young is pathetic. When my mom was in school there was only like 2 or 3 pregnant girls in a graduating class of 500+. There is about 15 girls their Freshman year getting pregnant at my school, and it doesn't even have 100

oh yeah, because the girl had nothing to do with it. the girl is just as much responsible as the boy! why do people think it's all the boys fault?

415 - my school actually has an entire seperate school dedicated to pregnant highschoolers ?! i mean c'mon now. kids just need to slow down and be KIDS before they rush into all of that. i dont think they realize that they have their whole life ahead of them and that having sex with 10 or 15 guys/girls by the time you're 15 or 16 is going to make you feel like shit about yourself in the future.

Seriously! There is actually a day care at my school for the children of students, and there are 7th graders (read: 12 year olds) having sex at parties, drinking, smoking, etc. And they think they're mature. Honestly, I'm ashamed to be a part of my generation.

275 - Calling us jackasses for having sex? I guess we know whos a virgin.

644 that's fine if my comment makes me look like a virgin. bc yours make you look like a disgusting pig:)

Exactly... Boys would jump at any opportunity to hav sex. Its the girls responsibility to wait. Guys just can't handle it

I'm a kid and I think 15 is way too young. As for 13? That's neither healthy or right!

Even when you're that young you want to do it, you just need to get it under control and resist

That's why you need to be careful.

avenged sevenfold is possibly the best band ever!(:

I agree!

They are pretty much amazing.

I agree !

I agree. Best band ever XD (I just wanted to add to the fan column here) lmao

exactly #7

They're right, A7X is brilliant. stop thumbing me down, now.

Avenged Sevenfold might be the worst band ever. August Burns Red is where it's at.

If you don't know how to have protected sex, you're too young to be having sex.

that is the smartest and deepest thing I've ever heard!

Simplest birth control method: FUCKING PULL OUT. HERP DERP.

theyre to young to be having sex regardless...

182, even if you pull out it will not always work.
the best birth control method is no sex at all. second best is a latex condom (that is not expired)

u don't know how old the boy is, just cause she is 15 doesn't mean he is...

If you can't pay to raise a child until they are 18, you don't "need" to have sex.

Of course, you could go on welfare, use the free clinics, and become a SLAVE to your Government for all your needs.

THIS makes sense to me, not just saying 15 in general is too young. If a couple is 15 and mature enough to get themselves condoms, get on birth control, AND use both properly, keep on bangin', bros. And tell your friends about common sense, while you're at it.

I know people who use everything possible to prevent pregnancy and they still got pregnant. all birth control is 99.9% preventable. 100% if you don't have sex! if you're too young to get a job and support yourself then don't risk having a baby. I'm sick of kids, who are still under their parents care getting a roof and financial help from their parents, getting pregnant.

though, I do have to say sometimes it's the parents' fault for not having the talk and really explaining how parenthood is hard. but talks can only go so far. you have to cross your fingers that your kids listened.

@316: So YOUR solution is that as long as you plan properly, have at it. But there is 1 FUNDAMENTAL flaw with your logic dipshit.

If you intentionally OR ignorantly violate the State Statutes governing Age of Consent/Statutory Rape, it does not make a damn bit of difference about "how" protected you are. It does NOT matter if you have a notarized Statement of Consent from her. It does not matter if you are wearing bullet proof, bomb proof gear, while inside a suit of armor, having been hermetically sealed inside a Mason jar sitting on Funk & Wagnell's porch since noon on Tuesday. You GET IT?

Now THIS is COMMON SENSE. But in YOUR case, it apparently is most UNCOMMON. And it is the reason that the above such laws are in ALL 50 States.

But there's always abortion.

445 needs to get laid.

You ought to be shot

Then so does the girl. Takes two to make a baby.

hence the law, "both the adulterer and the adultress must be put to death"..jus sayin

no no. he can't get shot. someone has to pay child support, after all.

R.I.P.

that's actually true

u jacked my comment

Clean his guns with him, having some awkward father son bonding will bring you closer.

"So, Mr. H, there's something I need to-"
"Don't forget to clean out the barrel of the gun, son."
"Right, but Mr. H..."
"Here, lemme load it up, now...good as new."
"Mr. H, it's really kindof important, you see I-"
"what is it?! spit it out, boy!"
"Igotyourdaughterpregnant!"
BOOM.
The end.