A plastic surgery addict gets yet another nose job, ends up with a neverending stiffie!

Plastic surgery operations are like pistachio nuts: once you've had a few, you can't stop. This 45-year-old Serbian man found out the hard way that his addiction could have dramatic and most of all painful consequences for his knob.

No need for Viagra when you're getting a rhinoplasty!

No, rhinoplasty isn't an operation to help you transition into a rhinoceros (even though that would be pretty cool), it's getting a nosejob in layman's terms. In this case though, you could say that the patient did get a horn transplant, but not the nice, friendly kind. Neven Ciganovic, a TV reality star in his native Serbia, had gone to Iran to get another in a series of nosejobs, all the while being followed by a British TV crew from Channel 4 who was making a documentary about his life and his quest for extensive body modification. However, once back in Belgrade, he began to experience long-lasting erections.

(His "I will never forget" is most fitting, considering his experience)

No dick pics, just priapic dick

Neven told various news outlets that during his operation the doctors provoked, via the anesthetic, a rare side-effect (unless you're called Charlie Sheen) called priapism. It boils down to a blood flow that gets trapped in the penis, just like a conventional erection, but despite hearing a song by Sting or seeing an M. Night Shyamalan movie, the boner keeps on going, the blood being trapped and making the whole area painful. It can even become dangerous for the precious organ if it goes on for more than 4 hours.

Neven stayed in Belgrade hospital for 4 days, with no access to painkillers because "they don't give them to patients here" and had to stay 5 more days after an operation fixed his penis problem.

What can cause such a horn ?

Nothing to do with any wind instruments or anything being blown, it can be the result of anything that messes with your nervous system, certain medications, drugs, antidepressants and some episodes of Game of Thrones.

(When can this occur? Who knows…)

Should he be taking a break from plastic surgery?

Yes, maybe a tad. He’s undergone over a dozen interventions, three to his nose, added to which some lip, stomach and chin “enhancements”. But it's the last operation, destined to straighten out his nasal septum, which sent him into the international public eye, for better or for worse. Which was, let's face it, a goal he's been aiming for all along. 

"I look forward to a movie about myself. Channel 4 dedicated a whole episode about me. I think this is a big deal and I hope this is the start of my international career."

“Better to hate me because for what I am than to love me for what I’m not.”

This has become his motto, and frankly, when you've undergone so many procedures to change/improve yourself, we can only wonder what's left of the real person. But to each his own, and we're not going to cast the first stone. We just want him to be happy, without the permanent, painful erect penis. Nobody wants that. 

Of course, it's what's inside that matter. But have you ever seen totally convincing plastic surgery? So why go through with it? Just make do with what nature (or our parents) gave us. Be true to yourself. Or something.

Here at FML, we're all butt-ugly, otherwise we wouldn't be FML.





By Peter Priapic / Monday 11 September 2017 11:44 /
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Top comments
By  MandySkittles  |  18

Why do these articles keep transitioning to/from French? Does someone actually get paid to do this? I'll gladly do a better job and make sure I proofread before posting.

By  MandySkittles  |  18

Why do these articles keep transitioning to/from French? Does someone actually get paid to do this? I'll gladly do a better job and make sure I proofread before posting.

  samomaha  |  17

As a gay man, I have to agree with Ashamed_Sister.

By  afallingstar  |  22

He looks really creepy. Like a badly done video game character (like a Sim as someone said.) It's not at all attractive and speaks loudly of self esteem issues.