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Today, I thought it would be fun to tease my dog by standing above her and hitting each of her paws repeatedly. My dog thought it would be fun to jump up and bite at my chest whilst I wasn't wearing a shirt. I just spent four hours in hospital getting my nipple sewn back on. FML

#5289656
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11554) - you deserved it (80575)

On 09/16/2009 at 9:24am - animals - by nipped (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was napping with my boyfriend and his dog. The dog was making odd coughing noises, but my boyfriend refused to kick him out of the bed. A few moments later, I rolled onto my stomach, into a pile of dog vomit. FML

#5283658
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35210) - you deserved it (4191)

On 09/15/2009 at 10:43pm - animals - by Brinty (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was finishing up my art project that was due the next day. I was really tired and fell asleep on my table. Three hours later, I woke up to find my project torn to bits. I went out and saw my cat vomitting out feathers and other materials I used for my project. FML

#5270344
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32531) - you deserved it (7670)

On 09/15/2009 at 9:21am - animals - by Meow (woman) - Singapore

Today, I was taking my morning pills. There had been a lot of fruit flies in my house lately. I grabbed a cup of water beside to sink to wash the pills down. As soon as I tasted the drink, I realized it was vinegar and dish soap used to trap the flies. I washed my pills down with dead flies. FML

#5244786
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28485) - you deserved it (24720)

On 09/14/2009 at 1:07am - animals - by Maggie123 (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was looking in my laundry basket for a clean tank top to wear. As I felt around, I realized that most of my clothes were still wet after two days. After asking my mom what was wrong with the dryer, I found out that for two days my cat had been using my laundry basket as a litter box. FML

#5243722
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32005) - you deserved it (4786)

On 09/14/2009 at 12:20am - animals - by catpeecathy (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my parents told me they wouldn't be able to afford my senior portraits. That was fine with me, until I found some expensive professional photos in the mail. Of our dog. FML

#5228035
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47388) - you deserved it (2208)

On 09/13/2009 at 12:44pm - animals - by sarahpft (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was on the job as an ambulance driver, I got a call about a man who claimed he'd had a heart attack. When I got to the house, it turned out the man was fine. I did however manage to hit a dog on the way there in fear of the man dying. FML

#5207725
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37409) - you deserved it (4940)

On 09/12/2009 at 2:35pm - animals - by ambulancedriver (man) - Poland (Warszawa)

Today, I got out of the shower to find my cat staring up at me. Apparently my swinging penis looks like a cat toy to her, so she jumped up and clawed and tried to bite it. FML

#5189788
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41296) - you deserved it (6738)

On 09/11/2009 at 4:46pm - animals - by ouchh (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was putting my horse away into her pasture, when I slipped in the mud. In a haisty attempt to support myself, I grabbed the electric fence in on hand, and my horse with the other. The shock from the fence traveled through me to her, sending her running and leaving me with 2 broken teeth. FML

#5185594
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39423) - you deserved it (5970)

On 09/11/2009 at 10:48am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was sitting in my garden and having a cup of tea while watching some dragonflies. I thought the dragonflies were really pretty, so I ran towards them and tried to catch their tails like I used to when I was a kid. They were exotic wasps. Ouch. FML

#5166138
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12647) - you deserved it (44691)

On 09/10/2009 at 9:40am - animals - by Lala (woman) - Philippines (Batangas)

Today, my Grandmother was sent to the ER. My family blamed it on her being allergic to my cats, making me feel guilty. She just called me to tell me the test results informed her that she is actually allergic to the carrot cake they got her. I gave my cats away 15 minutes ago to a little girl. FML

#5148026
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41761) - you deserved it (7216)

On 09/09/2009 at 12:53pm - animals - by hwood (woman) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I yelled at my dog for waking me up growling and barking out the window. He was doing it at the person stealing my car. FML

#5146144
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10921) - you deserved it (47621)

On 09/09/2009 at 9:21am - animals - by GoodDog (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, as I was using my mom's computer, a spider crawled onto the screen. So as per my usual reaction to seeing a spider, I smashed it as fast as I could. I missed the spider, but now I have to buy my mom a new monitor. FML

#5052267
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8139) - you deserved it (40777)

On 09/05/2009 at 12:06am - animals - by spideypowers (woman) - United States (Illinois)



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