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Today, my cat was in the bathroom with me. I was getting undressed to get into the shower. My cat looked at me after I'd undressed and then threw up all over the rug. FML

#287682
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (128580) - you deserved it (19247)

On 03/12/2009 at 6:08pm - animals - by Noname (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my cat got into the bathroom while I was changing my tampon. As I was throwing the applicator away, I felt a sharp pain around my vagina; I looked down to find him swatting at the tampon string. FML

Today, I went on a run with this cute guy I know. I was sweating untractively and profusely so I decided to discretly grab a leaf from a tree and wipe my face with it. A bird had done the same with his ass few minutes ago. FML

#261898
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37015) - you deserved it (26948)

On 03/10/2009 at 4:42pm - animals - by broussimousse - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I stretched out my wedding dress on my bed so it could air out before the big day tomorrow. Later I returned to my room only to find my cat on my wedding dress, it peed on it. FML

#260115
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52280) - you deserved it (14847)

On 03/10/2009 at 11:53am - animals - by Noname (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I came back to my apartment to see that my roommate had left out bread, deli meat, and cheese on the counter, and made myself a sandwich. When she came back, she informs me that she found bugs in the fridge and took out all the food she thought would be contaminated. FML

#217564
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39327) - you deserved it (13694)

On 03/05/2009 at 3:12pm - animals - by ohnolunch - United States (California)

Today, I received a card in the mail. It was from my vet's office. Written inside was "We send our sympathy during this trying time." I haven't been home in three days. I can't find my dog and my mother won't talk about it. My dog was 7. She hated that dog. FML

#216168
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62505) - you deserved it (2093)

On 03/05/2009 at 11:06am - animals - by nochance (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my roommate and I finally got fed up with this increasingly, horrible stench that has been in our apartment for a few days now. Leaving it for our other roommates to handle, we selfishly left to get yogurtland. Moments later, we both expressed that we haven't seen our cat in a while. FML

#185319
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12092) - you deserved it (47584)

On 03/02/2009 at 4:32pm - animals - by pacificbeach - United States (California)

Today, my cat was in the bathroom when I was undressing to get into the shower. I realized that he was the only male to have seen me naked in the past two months. Then he started scratching the door for me to let him out. FML

#171623
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44653) - you deserved it (7176)

On 03/01/2009 at 3:36pm - animals - by catlady (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my mother decided she wanted the family to go on a special outing for the holidays. She asked me to drive everyone when she got home from work. Later I noticed the house was empty. The whole family, including the dog, left without telling me. They took my car. FML

Today, I woke up to find that my dog was missing. I spent about an hour searching for him when my psycho ex-girlfriend texted me his photo. She'd kidnapped him. After driving over there, she shot paintballs at my car. Now I have no dog and a colorful car. FML

#128340
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (90160) - you deserved it (6224)

On 02/24/2009 at 10:21pm - animals - by sammatthews2007 (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was over at my boyfriend's house and I heard a strange sound. I laughed and said, "It sounds like a dog throwing up!" He listened for a second and said "That's my mom crying downstairs." FML

#115148
24 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10374) - you deserved it (34067)

On 02/23/2009 at 4:58pm - animals - by frenchpop1960 (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I took my dog for a walk down by the river. I was throwing sticks for him with one hand and talking on the phone with the other. Then I accidentally threw my phone in the river instead of the stick and was standing there talking to the stick while my phone sat at the bottom of the river. FML

#102926
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15211) - you deserved it (52137)

On 02/22/2009 at 9:52am - animals - by El Boz (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I realized that the beef jerky someone had left on the counter and that I'd been sneaking a few pieces of every morning had a cartoon dog holding two strips of beef jerky. I wondered why nobody else was eating it. It was beef jerky for dogs. FML

#94421
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7296) - you deserved it (42991)

On 02/21/2009 at 2:44am - animals - by Chubsley (man) - United States (Virginia)



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