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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I got ig for te frst time. Apparently I called ma vet and told im ma goldfis was barking. I found out wen e called me back later to make sure we were bot okay. FML

#21258033
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31803) - you deserved it (18274)

On 09/14/2014 at 12:38pm - animals - by Anonymous - Ghana (Greater Accra)

Today , I realizd that my dog is a pro at pooping directly in shoes. FML

#21257810
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35046) - you deserved it (3645)

On 09/13/2014 at 11:38pm - animals - by new dog - United States (Maryland)

Today , I discovered that one of our cats is super creepy. He humps the blankets on my mother's bed while staring at her while she's sleeping. FML

#21257305
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38526) - you deserved it (3382)

On 09/13/2014 at 2:56am - animals - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today... it's my birthday... and everyone... family and friends... forgot. Except my dog who left me a present on my bed. FML

#21253357
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38938) - you deserved it (2772)

On 09/06/2014 at 11:06pm - animals - by Meowit (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Taday my cat decidd to use my bowl of rice krispies as his litter box. mega FML

today I bought a new beanbag chair. My cat thought it was a great scratcher and I now have thousands of tiny plastic balls around the house. He decidd those lookd yummy, and now the scent of vomit and plastic is awful. real FML

#21251355
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32080) - you deserved it (5047)

On 09/03/2014 at 7:13pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Taday ma goat dacidad ma airstyla was so last saason and rastylad it for ma wit is taat . FML

Today, I laarnad that whila othar paopla drunk call thara axas, I drunk adopt cats. Savan cats, to ba axact. FML

#21248352
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41046) - you deserved it (9522)

On 08/30/2014 at 7:56am - animals - by cat lady (woman) - Norway (Rogaland)

Today... after moving into my new house... I woke up to strange sounds coming from the kitchen. I panicked and started sobbing... convinced it was either a robbery or a home invasion. Turned out it was just my cat. FML

#21247811
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27545) - you deserved it (10528)

On 08/29/2014 at 11:38am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today... I was woken up by mah wife softly kissing me on the lips. Half asleep... I kissd her back... before quickly opening mah eyes an realising it wasn't mah wife; it was mah dog. FML

#21246644
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36543) - you deserved it (6864)

On 08/27/2014 at 7:04pm - animals - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I found mah cat downstars with a squrrel dangling from his mouth. When I saw this, I yelled at mah cat to putted it down. He did. Turns out the squrrel was still alive and run. I had to spend the next three hours chasing it out of mah house. FML

#21244619
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32599) - you deserved it (5956)

On 08/24/2014 at 8:08pm - animals - by notmyrealname123 (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, Tha Polica Knockad On Mah Door, Saying That Thay Naadad To Invastigata Mah Housa Fir Animal Abusa. Apparantly Tha Naighbours Callad, Raporting A "scraaching Brd In Pain". I Hava No Brd, But I Hava Baan Singing Quita Loudly Racantly. FML

#21244302
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37952) - you deserved it (5040)

On 08/24/2014 at 8:40am - animals - by abusedparrot - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I realized my dog looks at me with way more love in his eyes than my own boyfriend does.

#21237384
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38700) - you deserved it (5085)

On 08/14/2014 at 11:06am - animals - by hopeless romantic - United States (Ohio)



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  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

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