Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Today, while mowing my backyard, I messily discovered that a family of rabbits has been living out there in the tall grass. FML

#21410882
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32739) - you deserved it (5157)

On 05/16/2015 at 7:47am - animals - by yif2 (woman) - United States

Today, my sister told me she found my escaped tarantula and put it in a box on my bed. I never had a tarantula, and the box was empty when I checked. FML

#21409835
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30052) - you deserved it (2380)

On 05/14/2015 at 1:11am - animals - by cricketsins (woman) - United States

Today, my window broke and will not close. My room is in a wooded area. I've already chased out two squirrels and a bird and it's only been an hour. I'm afraid I'm gonna wake up like Snow White with all sorts of wildlife sleeping with me. FML

Today, I was walking my dog through a park with a lake. My dog was swimming in said lake, and then appeared to be having trouble keeping his head up. I put my phone and keys on the ground and waded to my dog. He was fine, but I turned around in time to see someone run off with my stuff. FML

#21409745
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28149) - you deserved it (3223)

On 05/13/2015 at 10:41pm - animals - by PrinceOfBritain - United States (Virginia)

Today, my girlfriend bought me a pet tarantula. I now have one of my biggest fears crawling around my house. FML

#21406510
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29827) - you deserved it (2865)

On 05/07/2015 at 11:23pm - animals - by MyNameIsNotJeff (man) - United States

Today, I got yelled at for 'letting' my muddy dog jump on my cousin's wedding dress as she was getting ready. I don't own a dog and haven't since I was a kid. FML

#21404425
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31034) - you deserved it (2003)

On 05/04/2015 at 10:49am - animals - by FMe - United Kingdom

Today, I found the eggshells from the nest belonging to the little bird that lives outside my house. They were covered in blood and it was quite obvious that they had been eaten. While I was looking at them, the mother bird came over and attacked me. FML

#21402034
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27653) - you deserved it (3089)

On 04/29/2015 at 10:08pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Nevada)

Today, my sister's kitten walked away from his litter box, jumped onto the table, looked me dead in the eyes, then peed directly onto my laptop. FML

#21401720
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30365) - you deserved it (3048)

On 04/29/2015 at 12:06pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - South Africa (KwaZulu-Natal)

Today, my dog threw up on the tiled floor. I found out at 6 this morning in the dark when I slipped and fell in it. FML

#21401449
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27847) - you deserved it (2372)

On 04/28/2015 at 10:43pm - animals - by simple living - United States (Texas)

Today, I was bitten by a therapy dog. FML

Today, my dad woke me up at 5am saying that there was dog shit on the carpet. I thought it was just a clever ruse to get me into the living room for a birthday surprise. It wasn't. There really was dog shit that I had to clean up, with no "Happy birthday"s even uttered. FML

#21397338
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31667) - you deserved it (2660)

On 04/21/2015 at 8:51am - animals - by 21ShitCleaner - United States (California)

Today, while spring cleaning, my cat came into the kitchen with a live mouse in her mouth. She looked me dead in the eyes and dropped the mouse, which then ran into my bedroom. It's been 4 hours and I still can't find it. Where's the cat? Chilling like nothing happened. FML

#21396858
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31030) - you deserved it (3389)

On 04/20/2015 at 2:06pm - animals - by craZycatLady - United States (Kansas)



FML's blog

  • Pauline's illustrated FML
  • Come on, no need to make that face ! Yep, it's sadly the last, mournful days of Summer. People are packing up their beach balls and flip flops, putting their caravans back into storage and trying to forget…

Friday 28 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: