By Cat Piss - 15/12/2013 16:58 - United States - Lavon

Today, I was woken up to the sound of my cat peeing on the pillow next to mine. When I yelled at him, he jumped over my face and off the bed. He was still peeing the entire time. FML
I agree, your life sucks 47 674
You deserved it 6 875

Same thing different taste

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That would of been a funny YouTube cat video.

CallMeMcFeelii 13

I don't see why you act as if number one's comment is tainted just because of a little mistake like that. Yes, it's not proper grammar but for Christ sake it isn't that bad. People who like to point out every single imperfection piss me off. Number 1, try to remember if "would" is in front, "have" comes next. All in all, not a big deal though.

juststephhere 23

I totally agree! That would be hilarious. And would of, would've, when you say it out loud, it sounds the same. No big deal

I'm sorry, but "would of" is a pet peeve of many people - I'm always happy to see it corrected as hopefully the offender will stop doing it :)

#43. Nope. Even though english isn't my first language I cringe everytime I see someone write 'would of'. Sorry but it makes you look dumb. In fact, it's the worst.

49, so do pedophilia and podophelia, but one is a common fetish and the other is a horrible, beyond disgusting sickness of the mind. That's why words are different, for clarity.

dreamsneverfall 8

It most definately would not have been funny! I was awoken by the sound of choking coming from my cat and opened my eyes just in time for her to vomit on my face. Cats really suck sometimes.

#15 Dogs aren't possessed by the devil tho

Have you spent much time around a husky? ;)

kristabelli 19

This ranks up there with all of the best (worst?) FMLs ever. FYL, OP. I'm not sure my cat, if I had one, would be in one piece after that.

Dogs pee more than cats (depending on size), but cat pee smells worse.

None of my cats have ever done their business outside of their litter boxes. Our dog, however, has an accident at least once a week on the carpet, despite letting her outside several times a day.

My dog has never peed anywhere but outside, and the only time he pooped in the house, he was sick. Dogs don't spite pee. My cat would get mad about something and pee on the carpet. And cat pee is rank.

Come on, cats can be great! I have 3 cats and two dogs and they're all great. Anyways cats don't pee outside of their litter boxes- usually if they do, there's a problem. Either he's stressed, territorial, the litter box is full, or he doesn't like the litter. If you take good care of the cat, though, he should never go outside of the box! (with some exceptions of cats, for example some elderly cats might not be able to get there fast enough)

To OP: there are two reasons for a cat to pee outside of its box if its an indoor cat: #1 the cat is trying to tell you its sick and you have failed to notice the other signs, or #2 you haven't cleaned out its box. Cats are extremely clean animals, they won't make a "mess" unless they have good reason. So take it to the Vet or get off your ass and clean it's box. To everyone else: Dogs are better on so many levels but this is not one of them, dogs poop and pee with reckless abandon! My girl won't go in the house unless dying, while my boy is just a mess maker from day one. however, their pee doesn't induce vomiting and can be washed out. Cat pee is horrible and never goes away. We had to replace the carpet when mine got too old to hold it.

incoherentrmblr 21

#15 & 22: What's worse than both, sloth piss. Pure evil by nature & looks...

#125 you forgot spite peeing. my kitty likes to piss on my boyfriend's clothes when she hasn't seen me for a while.

kittykat1501 31

Hahaha cat vs dog! Always sparks a conversation. I personally like both, but cannot live without a cat for too long or I will start craving a cat's attention

get a dog.Base on dog stories compared to cat stories your chances of getting a pet from hell much more likely with a cat than a dog.Dogs listen, can be trained, and cats just stink in multiple ways

all wrong kiddo, either pet can be trained failure to do so will result in situations like this regardless

I've never had a bad cat. All of mine and my family's have been incredibly affectionate and mostly well behaved. My husband didn't like cats until he met mine. Now he and the siamese are best friends.

As a cat myself, I'd like to say we are perfect. If we pee on you or your stuff, it's your fault. We are rather quiet, we don't bark, someone said we stink (must have never smelled dog) but we don't, all we ask is you pets us, fill our food bowl, and leave us alone when you know we want you to:D

My dog definately smells worse than my cats. Cats are obsessive groomers while dogs are excessive mess-makers. Either way, both cats and dogs are awesome in their own ways when raised and trained properly :) And OP, keep that litterbox clean!

My dog has always smelled better than my cat (who was an indoor cat, so he wasn't out rolling in stank). But I have a particularly fastidious border collie. He doesn't like stepping in puddles.

Usually when a pet owner has a problem, it's the owners fault. key word: usually. Cat decided not to use the litter box? You didn't clean it. Or he's stressed, maybe you forgot to feed him this morning. Or maybe you ignored the fact that he doesn't like his new litter. There are some problems that aren't the owners fault though... for example, if the cat decides that your face is his new late-night scratching post.

My cat definitely knows a few tricks. It's pretty cool. She even has the self awareness to answer me when I ask her if she's hungry. If she is she waits by her bowls and if she's not she just keeps doing what she's doing. She also knows what bedtime, bath time, stay, and brush mean. Bath time just means I'm going take a shower and she'll get up and wait in the bathroom for me. She doesn't like to be alone if I'm home. It's not a cats vs dogs thing people.

Cats can most certainly be trained, usually one that misbehaves just has an owner that doesn't train them or pay attention to their needs. My cat is trained to come when I call his name and he never gets on the kitchen counter tops because he knows he isn't allowed to. I also take him for walks in a cat harness and leash and that takes training because cats need to be trained to walk on a leash, it goes against their nature. Although cats are not for everyone they are not Satan's minions or pure evil.

tompou6 19

I think it would be the time for *cough* snip, snip

if it is a female cat that won't do much for the problem....

What? That's gonna stop the cat from pissing everywhere? Breeding, yes. Pissing? No.

dam you people suck at reading, op specified its a male and snipping stops them from spraying

streetriots 9

Perhaps you can't read. It says peeing ... Not spraying.

Hiimhaileypotter 52

#44- Male cats will only not spray if they are young enough to have never learned how to. Fixing them after they've already started spraying often doesn't stop them, as they already know what to do.

These people don't know what they're talking about. Cats will urinate to mark their territory, or if they feel threatened, and both of these are more likely to happen if the cat is not neutered.

And it isn't just about learning behavior, a lot of it is because he is ready to breed... a lot of breeding behaviors also include urine and neutering will stop or at least make these behaviors less frequent.

I'm sure that there is probably a specialist website for this **********/watersports sort of thing. Maybe called Peeing Pets of Passion or scat cat etc

Zimmington 21

You think so StrangeDude? Rule 34 exists for a reason. But it seems to me like you're hoping for a link more than anything...

bfsd42 20

10, change your profile pic please.

Just to please you? Not a problem. There its changed. Happy?

I'm curious, what was his profile picture before?

MzZombicidal 36

#86, I believe it was an almost naked picture from an odd angle. Frankly, I'm a lot happier with the change. Lol.

What did you do? Cats usually don't do stuff like that unless they have a reason. Litterbox not clean? Moved to a new place? Got a new significant other? Trash her favorite toy?

katina1236 20

I agree, I have 3 cats and they've never peed on my bed, ok well maybe once but it wasn't his fault he was sick. But they often pee on my clothes if there on the floor, or in the basket containing said dirty laundry

Cats also tend to pee in places they shouldn't if they have a uti or something else wrong. It's their way of telling us. And when they pee on something, white vinegar gets the smell out. My last cat kept getting utis until his good was changed.

Some cats are known to 'spite pee' and some are worse than others, but the litter box being clean is a key preventative. General rule with cats? You want 1 litter box per cat, plus 1 extra. Even changing brands of litter can upset a kitty, if the smell is too weird, they'll pee somewhere else. Illness can be a common cause, UTIs and struvite are caused by chronic dehydration. Cats aren't designed to eat dry food only, wild cats get most of their water from meat. So feeding canned food with a little extra water, or raw, can go a LONG way. Also: when your cat isn't dehydrated, their pee doesn't smell like ammonia as badly.

...get another cat. Yeah, my primary cat did this when we got an auxiliary cat.