Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Today, I found a big spider on my wall. I have arachnophobia, and I was trying to kill it with my shoe. I pulled back and hit myself in the face, causing me to fall backwards. The spider is still alive somewhere in my house. FML


I agree, your life sucks (19843) - you deserved it (12776)

On 09/19/2010 at 2:21am - animals - by jillydark6609 (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Top comments

Your shoe works for PETA.

#8 - On 09/19/2010 at 6:20am by iicaptain

See in context

Don't kill it like that...chances are it will run away as spiders are very fast....Here is the best technique, imo (my sister has arachnophobia, and many people around me have varying degrees of it so I am the "spidercatcher"):

You need : a glass (choose the size depending on the size of the spider), a postcard or thin piece of card.

Method: take the glass and gently place over the spider. Take card, slide under glass without lifting the glass too high (so mister/miss/mrs spider doesn't escape), then lift the card and the glass at the same time & then a) throw it in the garden (my sister's preferred method as she says it's not the spider's fault she is scared of it) b) throw it down the loo . However, if like me you always have a slight fear of it climbing back up - I blame the incy wincy spider song for this lol - put some strong loo product like toilet duck or bleach to make sure...and ta da! no more evil spider....

Otherwise, find yourself a handy spidercatcher person like me who is always there to deal with them & tell them the technique!!!!

Good luck!!!!

#12 - On 09/19/2010 at 6:25am by fizziwizzi

See in context




Speak your mind, but please try and be respectful.

Top of the page

You must have an FML account to comment.

Don't have an FML account yet ? Sign up to FML!

Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • OK jkjk it was FMLS April Fools
  •   Yah its know over, ive stoppd wrotting… Sorry, I'll try again. There, it's over, I can stop typing TXT language with my forehead. Yes, you probably cottened on that it was our little…

Monday 30 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: