Today, I was so rushed getting out of the house that I ended...

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By "Sara Fredericks" - 01/12/2019 15:20

Today, I was so rushed getting out of the house that I ended up putting deodorant on only one armpit and didn't realize until halfway through the day that it was missing.

agreeclassic 64

vote type 1 14

When Christmas Ends Badly…
Rather than debating politics with Uncle Roger for the umpteenth time, share the best Christmas FMLs to finally have a good family meal! More…

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Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Intimacy Suspicious Sex Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

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Today, my new futon mattress arrived. Upon laying it out on the frame, I realized IKEA has whack bed sizings. When I went to return the mattress for a queen, they informed me a queen mattress wouldn't be here until sometime next week. I already threw out my old crappy mattress. FML

agreeclassic 9 963

vote type 1 2 579

Today, I had to run a timed mile. I'm terrible at running. During the run, I thought I was doing a good job. That is, until the teacher told me to stop because I was three laps behind everyone else. FML

agreeclassic 29 953

vote type 1 6 247

Today, while going through my daughter’s room, I found a pair of pants with the security tag still attached. My daughter is a thief. FML

agreeclassic 1 502

vote type 1 343

Today, I was with my friends at Burger King. While we were eating, I placed my cellphone on the tray, not realising that I'd left it there until after I emptied my tray into the bin. When I got it out of the trash, it was covered in soggy, sticky garbage. FML

agreeclassic 8 830

vote type 1 39 489

Today, we had painters in the house. My 4 year-old grandson kept telling me, "Grandpa ate the painter's sandwich." While the painters were running an errand, my husband ate their sandwich, then left to go to work. I was left to explain/apologize to the painters that my husband ate their PB&J. FML

agreeclassic 447

vote type 1 115

Today, my boyfriend and I celebrated our first apartment together by having a bloodcurdling, hot, screaming lovemaking session. Once we were done, we lay happily in each other's arms when we heard the neighbour say, no louder than a whisper, "They're done just in time for for the news." FML

agreeclassic 4 384

vote type 1 2 990