Today, I was in the shower and had shampoo in my hair. Some went... - FML

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By cydia123 - 06/03/2019 13:17

Today, I was in the shower and had shampoo in my hair. Some went in my eyes so I couldn’t see. I suddenly had the urge to pee so I let it all out. It wasn’t until I got out and dried my face that I realised how terrible my aim was. I’d peed outside the tub and all over the floor. I’m pissed. FML

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vote type 1 18

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Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

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Today, I was told by my best friend and roommate of 7 years that I’m a selfish asshole. Why? I won’t get over the fact that she’s dating my ex, who I was with for 10 years and had 3 kids with. We broke up because he proposed, and then cheated while she was in the house 3 days later. FML

agreeclassic 1 324

vote type 1 227

Today, I bombed a job interview after preparing overnight for it. It was literally my only opportunity to survive during this era of layoffs and hiring freezes, but I totally fudged it. I fucked it so hard that I can't feel my genitals. FML

agreeclassic 810

vote type 1 260

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agreeclassic 47 636

vote type 1 14 102

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agreeclassic 892

vote type 1 139

Today, I was telling my friends a story. I added a few "embellishments" to make it more intense. One my friends piped up with, "I was with you, half of what you just said wasn't true". It's now all over Facebook and I'm known as "The Bullshitter". FML

agreeclassic 18 073

vote type 1 72 026

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agreeclassic 851

vote type 1 139