Anonymous - 15/05/2009 22:09 Today, I spent $400 on campaign shirts for my school class elections and I lost.FML 0 1
Today, my boss fired me for "fooling around" on my phone. I was looking for supplies for a surprise party we are throwing him for his birthday, and I didn't want to do it on my work computer because he has access to our history. Also, this happened during my lunch break. FML 34 434 1 963
Today, my mom called me a “subhuman inbred.” All because I was fidgeting during church without realizing I was doing it. FML 511 128
Today, I was at a family gathering when my aunt asked me if I was seeing anyone special. In a tired and sarcastic tone, I jokingly said, “I’m actually getting married next month!” The room went silent, then some of them cheered. I had to explain I was kidding, but now they’re looking forward to a wedding I didn’t agree to. FML 144 534
Today, one of my coworkers called to remind me about the annual costume day at work this morning. I dressed as Pocahontas. There is no annual costume day. I was fired for dressing inappropriately in front of customers. FML 35 620 6 951
Today, when I tried on a pair of pants at the mall, I asked the salesperson if I could have the next size up. She informed me that there wasn't a next size up. I have to LOSE weight to fit into the biggest pair of pants the store makes. FML 18 725 38 169
Today, I mixed up my chapstick and cork grease. Now my clarinet smells like cherries, and my lips smell like a gym floor. FML 32 468 7 234