Today, my grandfather died. The last thing he said to me was "You smell awful." I work in a fish store. FML

by Mangler / 06/22/2010 at 9:49am / Belgium (Antwerpen) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to my boyfriend's apartment to surprise him with breakfast only to find that his other girlfriend had beat me to it. FML

by k.love / 06/22/2010 at 8:59am / United States (Utah) / Love

Today, I went camping with my husband. We drove 11 hours to his favourite site before he remembered he didn't put the tent in the car. FML

by angry / 06/22/2010 at 3:47am / Australia (Queensland) / Love

Today, I found out that after working in the same office for five years, I now work with three of my husband's ex-girlfriends. FML

by lilrudegirl / 06/21/2010 at 10:12pm / Work

Today, I had to buy a wrist brace for a repetitive strain injury. I got the injury because I was knitting too much. I'm 22. FML

by GrannyAt22 / 06/21/2010 at 9:28pm / Canada (Saskatchewan) / Health

Today, I finally met the guy I've been talking to online for a year. I'd dropped 10lbs off my weight. He'd shaved 20 years off his age. FML

by keisha89 / 06/21/2010 at 8:27pm / United States / Love

Today, I went into the store where my boyfriend works. I saw him talking to a customer, his back was facing me, so I went up and smacked his butt. Turns out it wasn't him. FML

by pizzafreak18 / 06/21/2010 at 10:21am / United States (New York) / Love

Today, the Vuvuzela that my brother ordered online was delivered to our house. FML

by anonymous / 06/21/2010 at 8:21am / Kids

Today, my boyfriend moved. I found out when I went over to surprise him with take-out food and he was pulling out of the driveway. He flipped me off as he drove past. FML

by Anony Mous / 06/20/2010 at 7:37pm / United States (Michigan) / Love

Today, I learned that in my family, 'Father's Day' is more like 'Father's drunken, piss on a plant in the kitchen during breakfast, order you to scrub in between his toes with your toothbrush Day.' FML

by Sam / 06/20/2010 at 9:18am / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at work as a musician, sitting on a piano bench. Suddenly I found myself at eye-level with the piano, dumped on the floor by the broken bench, with my legs splayed out. I felt like I picked the wrong day to wear a skirt to work - but the audience members all disagreed. FML

by Anonymous / 06/20/2010 at 3:21am / United States (Ohio) / Work

Today, my future father-in-law, a respectable New England gentleman, bought me an $8,000 viola and bow for our engagement. I was so surprised that I spit a glass of wine from a 60 year old bottle all over his custom-tailored suit. He was not happy. FML

by Mr.Viola / 06/20/2010 at 2:42am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I finally got my first kiss. I was so excited, I pissed myself. FML

by PissyPants / 06/20/2010 at 1:12am / United States (California) / Love