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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, I was in a toilet cubicle, when I overheard two of my friends at the sink talking about how ugly and skinny I was. FML

#1516
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17639) - you deserved it (1537)

On 01/17/2009 at 9:55pm - misc - by Youknowwho - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I posted a question on a forum asking if my week old nipple piercing would get hooked on anything easily. People assured me that it would be fine. An hour later I had to climb over a wall to get something and in lowering myself down I forgot about it and dragged my nipple along the wall. FML

#1510
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5596) - you deserved it (20710)

On 01/17/2009 at 8:48pm - misc - by jdot747 - Canada (Newfoundland and Labrador)

Today, the guy I've had a crush on for a while called me and asked me over. I took a cab to his place and when I got there he was dressed in leather and wore a mask... It took me a 20 dollar cab fare to realize my crush is a freak. FML

#1507
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28405) - you deserved it (6156)

On 01/17/2009 at 8:38pm - intimacy - by Allenburg - United States (California)

Today, my house got egged and since it is the winter the eggs froze. They used two dozen eggs. FML

#1499
27 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17254) - you deserved it (1590)

On 01/17/2009 at 7:52pm - misc - by Noname - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got an email notification from Yahoo! Personals: "Hi, we've found 0 new matches for you". FML

#1495
18 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15411) - you deserved it (1934)

On 01/17/2009 at 7:40pm - love - by sad sack. - United States (Florida)

Today, it was my 24th birthday. I got a card from my sister reading: "Here's to another year of complete disregard for age-appropriate developmental milestones." She was right. FML

#1490
12 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9395) - you deserved it (1780)

On 01/17/2009 at 7:04pm - misc - by nothreat33 - United States (Maryland)

Today, was just like almost every for the past few months; I slept till 1pm, smoked cigarettes, jerked off, went to the store to get coffee, smoked more cigarettes, and sat in my room alone until 4am, jerking off and smoking cigarettes. FML

#1487
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9142) - you deserved it (34466)

On 01/17/2009 at 6:35pm - misc - by none - United States (New Jersey)

Today, at a party, I watched the guy I've liked for AGES come out of a bedroom with one of my gay male friends. They were in there for a while. FML

#1485
26 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19407) - you deserved it (2037)

On 01/17/2009 at 6:17pm - love - by C2 - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, me and my friend are sitting here on fmylife.com while our boyfriends are out clubbing. FML

#1483
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9814) - you deserved it (18915)

On 01/17/2009 at 5:57pm - misc - by ishweta56 - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I printed my 10 page econometrics problem set questions out on $15/100 sheet ivory resume paper that I'd accidentally left in the paper tray on my printer. It turned out to be the wrong assignment. FML

#1482
13 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5922) - you deserved it (11204)

On 01/17/2009 at 5:31pm - misc - by Nathan - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was putting a wristband on a little boy's wrist so he could swim in the waterpark. Just before I finished, he coughed all over my hands and arms. I finished and looked up at the boy just in time for us to make eye contact and for him to cough directly into my face. FML

#1471
14 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15031) - you deserved it (1632)

On 01/17/2009 at 3:57pm - kids - by kallens - United States (Minnesota)

Today, all I wanted was stress-relief sex with the guy I sleep with. Instead, I was so exhausted from my day that he thought I wasn't into it and ended up just talking to me about what we're going to do after college. Trading a booty call for a meaningful and heartfelt discussion. FML

#1468
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7817) - you deserved it (31404)

On 01/17/2009 at 3:40pm - intimacy - by Noname - United States (New Jersey)

Today, the guy I've secretly been in love with for years told me how hot my brother is. FML

#1465
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20650) - you deserved it (1921)

On 01/17/2009 at 2:49pm - love - by Shantoya - United States (Oklahoma)



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